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Posts: 3076
Joined: January 11, 2006
Posted: April 21, 2011, 12:02 PM
Well, Here I am. don't feel much stronger. Waves of depression are odd very strong. And then when they are over I am fine. Crazy s***. Today is not that bad. Not that good, but not that bad. I am scheduled to meet with the sponsor tonight. We are goign for a walk, I hope it doesn't rain. Its' been pretty rainy here. So anyways...hanging in there.
-------------------- My success story Beliefs have the power to create and the power to destroy. Human beings have the awesome ability to take any experience of their lives and create a meaning that disempowers them or one that can literally save their lives. - Anthony Robbins Sometimes I lay awake at night and wonder where I've gone wrong. Then a little voice inside my head says, "This is going to take more than one night." "Ring the bells that still can ring. Forget your perfect offering. There is a crack in everything. That's how the light gets in." -Leonard Cohen  | ||
Posts: 9248
Joined: December 1, 2005
Posted: April 21, 2011, 2:03 PM
I loved that movie, 28 days. Remember, Sandra Bullock, the drunk, pill-head? She so reminded me of myself, smuggling pills into rehab, that woulda been me.........
Now, back to you. 28 days is huge, you're a couple days away from the big 30~! You're over the hump, it's all pretty much mental, the physical should be done now. We are goign for a walk, I hope it doesn't rain. Rain or shine, go. And be open, share from your heart. Listen to her suggestions. And, of course, I want to hear all about how it went. Last night, a sponsee & i spent quite a bit of time together and what I realized is there is a special bond, one that I don't have with any other human beings besides my sponsor. It truly is a blessing to have women whom you've bared your soul too, that you can trust, that you respect, in our lives. It's a spiritual experience for me. I am so grateful today that I am an alcoholic and have been graced with this journey I am on for as I walk & seek, I am rewarded more & more on a daily basis, blessed beyond measure. Enjoy your day, Jane. It's all what we make of it. Smooches, Stacey -------------------- Happiness is not in the bottom of a pill bottle. It's inside you. | ||
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Posts: 3076
Joined: January 11, 2006
Posted: April 21, 2011, 2:38 PM
LOL! Huh...that show. I was thinking that same thing as I posted it. I wonder where I could rent that show tonight. That would be perfect. BTW the mental is the scarey part. I am one very MENTAL individual. My thinking can get me in more trouble than anything. Me and The committee have some long days and nights. I will stick to it if my sponsor will. I aint afraid of no rain. :) I will let you know how it goes. (everyone) :)
-------------------- My success story Beliefs have the power to create and the power to destroy. Human beings have the awesome ability to take any experience of their lives and create a meaning that disempowers them or one that can literally save their lives. - Anthony Robbins Sometimes I lay awake at night and wonder where I've gone wrong. Then a little voice inside my head says, "This is going to take more than one night." "Ring the bells that still can ring. Forget your perfect offering. There is a crack in everything. That's how the light gets in." -Leonard Cohen | ||
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Posts: 3076
Joined: January 11, 2006
Posted: February 25, 2020, 12:25 PM
28 days. I love reading these old posts what great flashback.. I was always willing to do the next right thing. I feel like I am back at square one. I guess that can be ok. Just for today I willing to do the next inidcated thing. I am supposed to meet with my new temp sponsor or maybe she is just a sponsor now. I can't quite commit. I dont know if its her or if its me. I was listening to myself tell a sponsee who had asked about a sponsee she had and it was if I was saying the words to myself. That there is something to the synchonicity and being led to a certain person. It may not be forever but you may have something they need or something to learn. When I said it, I may have just got myself to a place where I am a little more invested. Anyways we are working step two. I have to get through my brain she is not my old sponsor. She is new. She doesnt have clear direction and i dont know if she has ever sponsored before. She has a ton of sobriety I met her first when I was in jail and she worked in the on unit treatment center. I think that treatment saved my life. So anyways whatever. . . It not super comfortable and I am not sure that I feel that just talked to my sponsor feeling when I am done. I miss that feeling. I will give it some time. I keep praying and doing whats in front of me. May end up putting me where I need to be. I am also headed to a conference this weekend with my best running friend. She is also in AA. Looking forward to that. I also smoked with her so hopefully that wont enter the picture. 28 days is something. Its no a ton but its a dang good start. Grateful to have some days behind me.
Much Love & Respect, Jane -------------------- My success story Beliefs have the power to create and the power to destroy. Human beings have the awesome ability to take any experience of their lives and create a meaning that disempowers them or one that can literally save their lives. - Anthony Robbins Sometimes I lay awake at night and wonder where I've gone wrong. Then a little voice inside my head says, "This is going to take more than one night." "Ring the bells that still can ring. Forget your perfect offering. There is a crack in everything. That's how the light gets in." -Leonard Cohen | ||
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