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Posted: October 11, 2014, 11:33 AM
Lily
I try and pass on whatever info I think might help. I have gone back and forth with the moral argument or smoking pot for most of the 30 years I've smoked it. It is a moral argument for me because everything about pot healthwise , spiritually, and mentally is supposed to be bad...but pots not all bad - there's the problem. So then it becomes about controlling use - but can use be controlled by and 'addict'? So then we have to know what defines an 'addict' and see if that really applies to our evaluation of self. Personalities affect how people respond to addiction as well....this is a complicated topic. People quit....and begin to take drugs for all sorts of reasons. Each person has to really look inward to get these answers. What works for one doesnt always work for another , so by sharing failures and successes with others we help others while helping ourself. So keep writing | ||
Posts: 1906
Joined: October 23, 2011
Posted: October 11, 2014, 11:38 AM
If you want to smoke that's your business..
If you want to quit that's NA's business. I wish you the best. Bob -------------------- Serenity Prayer God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference. Free copy of AA's Big Book on-line: http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/alcoh...olics-anonymous Free copy of NA's Big Book on-line: Copy & Paste coastalcarolinaarea.org/literature/books/b_t.pdf AA's HOW IT WORKS: Copy & paste www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-10_howitworks.pdf NA's HOW IT WORKS: http://www.na.org/admin/include/spa...0it%20Works.pdf ---------------------------------------------------------------- --- driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity. ---there are those too who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest. ... I need AA more than it needs me. --- I fight recovery tooth and nail.... I'm not used to being sane, it just doesn't seem natural. ...... According to the great spiritual teachers, ignorance does not result from what we don’t know; ignorance results from what we think we do know. ---Some think that 2+2=5 and believe it. Some know that 2+2=4 and can't stand it. --- I didn't have a very happy childhood but I sure am having a long one ! ---Dry since 1989 working daily on getting/staying SOBER. ---If you want to drink, that's your business ...If you want to quit, that's AA's business. ... Tell me, I'll forget; ... Show me, I'll remember; ... Engage me, I'll understand. ---Most problems are psychological. Most solutions are spiritual . "If we try to change our ego with the help of our ego, we only have a better-disguised ego." --Richard Rohr WWBWD (What Would Bill W. Do) | ||
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Posted: October 13, 2014, 3:25 PM
I have also dealt with this issue for over 20 years, nearly daily. I have tried to quit many times with no luck. I made it 8 months once. Still everyday even after those months i felt so lost and confused in my own brain. Like living with a stranger. Others say im a nice person when i dont smoke, but everyday was a struggle. I smoke again and still have issues with my anger but unless i am high i just want to die and take the world with me. Just so confused. I also tried na but i just wanted to smoke even more after all the stress of our conversations.
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Posts: 1906
Joined: October 23, 2011
Posted: October 13, 2014, 8:48 PM
I believe you quit just before the miracle happened.
I strongly suggest you give NA another try. I wish you the best. Bob R -------------------- Serenity Prayer God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference. Free copy of AA's Big Book on-line: http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/alcoh...olics-anonymous Free copy of NA's Big Book on-line: Copy & Paste coastalcarolinaarea.org/literature/books/b_t.pdf AA's HOW IT WORKS: Copy & paste www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-10_howitworks.pdf NA's HOW IT WORKS: http://www.na.org/admin/include/spa...0it%20Works.pdf ---------------------------------------------------------------- --- driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity. ---there are those too who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest. ... I need AA more than it needs me. --- I fight recovery tooth and nail.... I'm not used to being sane, it just doesn't seem natural. ...... According to the great spiritual teachers, ignorance does not result from what we don’t know; ignorance results from what we think we do know. ---Some think that 2+2=5 and believe it. Some know that 2+2=4 and can't stand it. --- I didn't have a very happy childhood but I sure am having a long one ! ---Dry since 1989 working daily on getting/staying SOBER. ---If you want to drink, that's your business ...If you want to quit, that's AA's business. ... Tell me, I'll forget; ... Show me, I'll remember; ... Engage me, I'll understand. ---Most problems are psychological. Most solutions are spiritual . "If we try to change our ego with the help of our ego, we only have a better-disguised ego." --Richard Rohr WWBWD (What Would Bill W. Do) | ||
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Posted: October 14, 2014, 12:03 PM
stuck
I have experienced most of what you describe. I used to be a closet smoker , no one in my family knew when I would smoke. Most the time I didnt smoke - usually sober at least 8 full months a year. But when they knew I was smoking - it got stressful. They saw it as their mission to make me quit completely....but they treated me like a typical out of control addict. They didnt know of my off and on relationship with pot that I have had over the years - to them , pot was heroin. I once went 10 years without pot. I was 'clean', but I dont know that I was happy. It was during this time that I experienced some of the worst years of my life.....I faced losing everything and wasnt even on drugs at the time. But when sober, I seemed to obsess about my situation and attempt to figure out a solution. Doesnt sound bad, but I would keep myself up at night with worry trying to figure out my life....I was miserble. The solution of others....force narcotic,brain-chemistry changing, addictive anti depressants on me - drugs I would likely have to take the rest of my life...you know - to be 'normal'. After 10 days of THEIR drugs of choice, a parkinson's like shaking of the right hand and an extremely low libido caused me to flush everything I had down the toilet. I'm a naturalist - I dont want any man-made medicine in my body if I can help it. I dont take antibiotics, no more vacinnations, and I take NO pills whatsoever. I have found that if wanted to put myself in a different state of mind - pot was the way to do it. My problem then becomes smoking in moderation. Can this be done? Everyone says the same thing....you cant smoke a little because you are an addict....feel bad - take a pill. I think marijuana can be used to treat anxiety/depression. It's the excessive smoking that causes us all problems. It seems to make sobriety harder when I know I can never smoke again. It makes me miss it more because of the finality. But when I quit for long periods - and then smoke? I like this pattern....but I need to warn people that this is something I have developed over 30 years. I know what works and doesnt work for myself. I'm not suggesting others do the same. I am simply writing about my perspective on this problem and offering another solution to dealing with addiction. It's all about control and self discipline....If you have these attributes, you can explore these methods. But if you are a one toke equals months of hard core use type....just stay away from smoking completely. Dont even try and control it - just say NO. | ||
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Posts: 1906
Joined: October 23, 2011
Posted: October 14, 2014, 4:31 PM
Untreated addiction is a progressive disease.
It is a 5% using/drinking problem and a 95% thinking problem. All the best. Bob R -------------------- Serenity Prayer God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference. Free copy of AA's Big Book on-line: http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/alcoh...olics-anonymous Free copy of NA's Big Book on-line: Copy & Paste coastalcarolinaarea.org/literature/books/b_t.pdf AA's HOW IT WORKS: Copy & paste www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-10_howitworks.pdf NA's HOW IT WORKS: http://www.na.org/admin/include/spa...0it%20Works.pdf ---------------------------------------------------------------- --- driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity. ---there are those too who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest. ... I need AA more than it needs me. --- I fight recovery tooth and nail.... I'm not used to being sane, it just doesn't seem natural. ...... According to the great spiritual teachers, ignorance does not result from what we don’t know; ignorance results from what we think we do know. ---Some think that 2+2=5 and believe it. Some know that 2+2=4 and can't stand it. --- I didn't have a very happy childhood but I sure am having a long one ! ---Dry since 1989 working daily on getting/staying SOBER. ---If you want to drink, that's your business ...If you want to quit, that's AA's business. ... Tell me, I'll forget; ... Show me, I'll remember; ... Engage me, I'll understand. ---Most problems are psychological. Most solutions are spiritual . "If we try to change our ego with the help of our ego, we only have a better-disguised ego." --Richard Rohr WWBWD (What Would Bill W. Do) | ||
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Posted: October 25, 2014, 4:18 PM
DAC
Hi thanks for that reply. Haven't been on here for a while and it feels good to pop in and see that I've gotten a reply in an interesting discussion. I have to agree to what you said, what works for one doesn't always work for the other. That is why I always say when I give my advice to my friends to try and see for themselves. You can only help and warn people as far as they allow you. I haven't smoked a joint in wow I can't remember I think it's been close to 4 weeks now and haven't craved it one bit. It doesn't bother me much and I got a full bag of weed tucked away for when I am in the mood. My biggest problem is that when I cut myself entirely off from the stuff that I tend to get addicted too, when I get the slightest taste I go all out and loose total control. So this time around I know that it is there but I'm not in the mood for it and I do not need it. You are also right each must sit and look deep into themselves when it comes to addictions. I really do like talking to you about this topic. How are you doing lately? Feel free to drop me a mail if you like. I'm definitely going to keep on writing especially on my diary blog, the last couple of weeks has been hectic and juggling everything has been quite a challenge that I am succeeding in. x | ||
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Posted: October 27, 2014, 1:39 PM
Lily
You seem to have a pattern similiar to my own. I have no problem quitting for a few weeks, even months with little temptation. But when I give in and smoke I am very excessive in how I go about it. It's like I understand that there is a short window to smoke , so I dont want to go a second without it. I binge. My way of dealing with this tendency is to try and allow it once or twice a month and then go back to no smoking at all. I realize this isn't really quitting, but it is a far cry from the all day every day smoking I used to do. This is playing with fire though. If something bad happens in life I could end up smoking more if I dont put it completely away. If I only smoke once per month for an extended time, then maybe this wouldnt be an issue though. Putting it away 'forever' is only something I can do if I think it is completely bad with no positives. But the reality is there will be times in the future where it would be ok to smoke on a special occassion. If I could make the once a month thing be a 'once a year' thing, I dont know that I would consider this a bad approach at all. Until then, I write about what I read and experience. I read today that the THC stored in your fat cells can be slowly released over time and this can increase your craving for marijuana. The article suggested 2-3 months where this could affect withdrawals. A recurring theme in a lot of what I read says that it is hard to quit if you dont do anything positive to help recover. Simple things like drink lots of water, excercise , do yoga or other breathing excercises (important for recovering smokers), and improve diet by eating fruit and more salads. If you neglect the positives, it is very easy to slip back to smoking because you have no progress to give up. And the number of days, or how long its been since smoking last is progress that we dont like to give up. This is the hardest thing about when I do break down and smoke occassionally. I know I have to start back at day 1, and day 1 isnt much progress - so why not smoke another day or so? But I dont smoke day after day...not easy, but I am trying to limit my future smoking as much as I can. | ||
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Posted: October 29, 2014, 4:11 PM
Hi DAC
Yeah I see what you mean. It is best to limit the space in between smoking. I use to smoke just to get my creative flow going but the last few weeks it all came flowing without any need to smoke. When I craved to draw but couldn't come up with anything great I would end up smoking a joint just so that I can draw. It really did annoy me a lot. You are also right about focusing on the positive things, it has helped me so much for the last few months. My whole attitude has changed since I stopped taking the pills. I was brought up with the saying that if you crave or want a chocolate then get yourself one but know its not necessary to go over board and take it too far. Now I know that is probably not a good saying on here but weed has always been like chocolates for me. I have had quite a few bad days and extremely stressful days since I've stopped with the pills as well as the weed. Not once did I crave to roll a joint, I did however wanted to go and get pain pills but I ended up focusing on the positive things and kept myself busy. I'm probably going to keep up with not smoking as those times I smoked only to relax and sleep it ended up annoying me and I didn't enjoy it. I use to like smoking on the odd occasions and not constantly. But one thing though I would rather smoke before I drink. I can't stand the person I become when I am drank and never want to be that person again. x | ||
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Posted: December 7, 2014, 2:37 PM
Hi:
I know you wrote this a few years ago but it was so good to read that people can get their lives back! I so wish you could talk to my boyfriend. Weed is ruining our relationship because it brings his anger out and he cant think rationally anymore. He wont listen to me and thinks I am trying to tell him how to run his life. I just want him to get better! He's barely talking to me right now and I know it has a lot to do with weed.. It hurts so much!!! I am a mess now too1 So sad!!! | ||
Posts: 674
Joined: August 17, 2014
Posted: December 7, 2014, 2:52 PM
Hi sue, that is the curse of addiction, it causes so much pain for everyone, the addict, those that love them, family and freinds, it cuts through all relationships like a plague - the unfortunate part is that quite often the addict does not realise the pain they are causing others, or chose not to see- when a person is using drugs/alcohol, no matter what it is they are addicted to- it will come first- before everyone and everything else in their lives, that is the unfortunate reality Sue- i cant offer you an easy solution, only your boyfreind can decide when he is ready to quit-
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Posted: December 7, 2014, 11:44 PM
Hi:
Thank you for responding. It makes me understand a bit better. I wish I could talk to him about this and he would discuss it with me but I have tried and he just gets defensive and says I don't understand. I know he has issues from his childhood and has told me about it recently. I thought he might go for counselling but it doesn't look like it now. I think I will go for myself though.... I have to do something. I pray all the time for help which does help me but as you said only he can stop if he wants and at this point he does not want to. He has told me that he is a poor excuse of man but he does nothing to improve himself. It is just heartbreaking. He has so much potential but it is wasted! He blames me for everything. But I know that is just not true. It still hurts though. I will pray again tonight and ask for more help in getting through this. | ||
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Posts: 1906
Joined: October 23, 2011
Posted: December 8, 2014, 10:59 AM
Hello Sue:
Help getting through is important but direction is even better. Please look up Al-Anon and/or Nar-Anon in your telephone book or on-line. At those meetings you will meet lots of people just like you and you will have a direction for recovery. All the best. Bob R -------------------- Serenity Prayer God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference. Free copy of AA's Big Book on-line: http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/alcoh...olics-anonymous Free copy of NA's Big Book on-line: Copy & Paste coastalcarolinaarea.org/literature/books/b_t.pdf AA's HOW IT WORKS: Copy & paste www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-10_howitworks.pdf NA's HOW IT WORKS: http://www.na.org/admin/include/spa...0it%20Works.pdf ---------------------------------------------------------------- --- driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity. ---there are those too who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest. ... I need AA more than it needs me. --- I fight recovery tooth and nail.... I'm not used to being sane, it just doesn't seem natural. ...... According to the great spiritual teachers, ignorance does not result from what we don’t know; ignorance results from what we think we do know. ---Some think that 2+2=5 and believe it. Some know that 2+2=4 and can't stand it. --- I didn't have a very happy childhood but I sure am having a long one ! ---Dry since 1989 working daily on getting/staying SOBER. ---If you want to drink, that's your business ...If you want to quit, that's AA's business. ... Tell me, I'll forget; ... Show me, I'll remember; ... Engage me, I'll understand. ---Most problems are psychological. Most solutions are spiritual . "If we try to change our ego with the help of our ego, we only have a better-disguised ego." --Richard Rohr WWBWD (What Would Bill W. Do) | ||
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Posts: 674
Joined: August 17, 2014
Posted: December 8, 2014, 4:45 PM
hi Sue , at the end of the day you are not responsible for him- i know you probably dont want to hear this but you cannot change this guy- you have to look out for yourself and what is best for you- if and when he comes to his senses and reaches out for help, well and good- but for now you must take care of you first- do what is right for you- all the best Sue
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Posted: January 30, 2015, 8:29 PM
I think I am starting to see what you mean. Don't listen to the addicts telling you it isn't the pot, they're just trying to justify their own habits. I've been smoking daily for the last 2 years. Like there wasn't a waking moment were I wasn't high. But anyway recently I've lost my job and I already had pretty bad anxiety which was probably made worse by smoking cause now its turning into a depression. and I'm quitting cigarettes finally but I've been smoking a lot less weed and the slightest things set me off now. Like I'm scared I might hurt my dogs or someone, but I never have. Just yelled and scared my dogs which I feel disgusted by when the wave of blind rage subsides. Its the worst. And I hope its just the weed and now my body and mind will adjust so I can be happy again.
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Posted: February 8, 2015, 8:46 PM
the Pot of Yesterday was natural . the Pot that is floating around has been in a lot of parts adulterated to more potency ! not the same stuff !! this I have found in MOST cases makes a RAGING A-HOLE lunatic out of the smoker !! ..(WHEN THEY CANNOT GET THE STUFF !! ) smoking the STUFF is YOUR business .... BEING a RAGING A HOLE is EVERYBODY`s business !!
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Posted: February 22, 2015, 4:51 PM
My Son is so angry from the weed I almost killeed myself cause I have no escape from him. He claims its not the weed but his Father n my Sister were the same way and when they quit their anger literally stopped.
My Son is Going to either hurt himself or someone else REALLY SOON and I have called doctor n police and no one will help me cause he hasnt done anything yet! THEY claim if he "says" he is not a danger to himself or anyone then they cant do anything but no sooner than they leave he is threatening suicide or that he is gonna kick someones a**..I am at a complete loss what to do anymore he broke all my kitchen cabinets all my doors in the house and holes in walls and like 5 tablets n bunch of phones. The list goes on but the worst is he verbally n mentaly abuses me really bad. I walk on eggshells constantly and im scared to death of him. He has raised his fist n items at me but never actually hit me but the verbal abusr is bad enough. I seriously cannot live like this anymore but see no escape from it. Not a soul will help me im willing to let ANYONE HELP ME at this point. I wish someone would scream at him n show him how it feels to be so scared. My Dad always said Lifes not Fair n man is he right. Any suggestions are GREATLY appreciated! thanks This post has been edited by moderator on February 24, 2015, 9:51 AM | ||
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Posted: March 2, 2015, 2:46 AM
if you smoke for a long time and then you decide to quit, it takes one week for you to feel anger,the the more time you don't smoke the better you start to feel, it's just that 1 or 2 weeks since your last joint when you feel angry and aggressive
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Posts: 16
Joined: March 6, 2015
Posted: March 6, 2015, 4:53 AM
It really depends on the person.
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Posted: March 18, 2015, 9:11 PM
I am 56 years old. I have smoked pot since I was 14. Never really stopped for any length of time. I am a chronic everyday user. I drove semi's for 26 years, and yes I smoked while driving. Never had an accident, and was considered the top driver of the company I worked for the last 12 years. Pot has held me back, and cost me more than one job. the financial end of it has kept me poor. I want to quit, but every time I run out I am so filled with hate and anger, that it drives me nuts. My advice. Quit now! after reading some of these stories, I think I will try again to quit. I have to now for at least the next 2 weeks since I am out and do not have the money to get some right now. It sucks and I'm bummed, but maybe this time I'll really give it up.
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