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Posted: January 31, 2017, 2:45 PM
Hello my son is addict to heroine and so am I. Do you think that I have the right to parent him, because we both share the same addiction. I dont want him to go down that path but at the same time, i dont want to give up heroine. What should i do.
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Posts: 529
Joined: October 15, 2016
Posted: January 31, 2017, 2:59 PM
ohh i dont know really, i dont have kids so wouldnt advise on parenting but looking fro where i stand saying nothing, doing nothing is no answer.. he needs reminder that he could have "normal" life life without when is my next hit life..Is it only you 2 living together or?
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Posts: 2616
Joined: January 4, 2008
Posted: January 31, 2017, 4:49 PM
Sounds like that train already left the station... he's addicted to heroin...not sure how you think he would want to stop...none of us usually do... what's to say...we use...we get in clean time. ..we try to stay off ...or we don't. ..parenting ? ...junkies don't as a rule do as well in that department. ..but wtf do I know...maybe your a functional addict and a great parent ....guess he's like any other heroin addict ...it's up to him ? Anyone ever change your mind about wanting to use ?
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Posted: January 31, 2017, 11:34 PM
bonnie5, yes heroine killed his father
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Posts: 529
Joined: October 15, 2016
Posted: February 2, 2017, 9:11 AM
i am sorry for your loss! I have to say considering its you 2 only living together i cant see how your child an get clean and stay that way if you are using around him., its almost impossible, then another thing is did he want clean life ...
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Posts: 271
Joined: June 27, 2015
Posted: February 8, 2017, 1:56 PM
Hello mom, I'm BabyLove. I too am a heroin addict and so is my mom. We use together. I've been using for six years and my madre, she's been for 28' years. Well, Ima try to help you with your question as best as I can. But I'm in my 30's now. And before I started using heroin. I was always on something else . My mom was never there for me. Sometimes it would be three months until I got to see her for a few hours. But as a teenager and in my twenties she would sometimes try to put her foot down and .tell me to do the things she wanted me to do, and that meant not going out with friends or just doing other things that I had been use to doing for so long. I never listened. I didn't think she had a right to parent me when she couldn't before. I honestly think she only tried to do it because she wanted to see how much authority she had on my life. Which was hardly any. That caused us a great deal of fighting, arguments and I mean the occasional fist fights. I didn't and actually still don't think she has the right to give me advice or tell me what to do and expect me to follow her say so. Because I really don't respect her as I would if she was never drug addicted. I don't even like to waste my time hearing her advice and when she questions me as to where, or what, why or when -I never tell her anything because if I tell her my business then I guess it gives her the thought as she's able to talk about the subject anytime she feels and expects me to tell her anything she wants to know about. Which is bull doodoo.! I think if she were to get sober and slowly try to come into my life as a parent then that would be different and I would give her the respect she is welcomed to have but until then she won't get that from me. Now I would only believe if God forbid I'm still like this when my two kids are older then I can only expect the same treatment from them as well. My mother and I live together now but I still don't respect her as I should if she was sober. I wish we both were because then we could finally have a real mother and daughter relationship. Now, every argument, every time we laugh, every conversation to be exact and the bond we finally got now since I've became a addict six years ago is always and only about the dope. Sad. And As I always say, "completely and utterly sad",.!!!!!. Good luck. Hope you find your sobriety.! Anything else I'm here for you !
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Posted: February 8, 2017, 4:06 PM
I'd say you need to decide what's important to you. Heroin or your son. I think the only chance you have to help him is to lead by example. Of course you don't want to give up heroin but nobody ever does. You can't possibly expect him to quit if you won't. Even if you do quit it's no guarantee he will. He's got his own demons to fight at this point. Losing a parent is a hard thing to overcome. Especially if the way you've dealt with it to this point is drugs. There is still hope. Get yourself clean and show him it can be done. At least at that point you will be in a far better frame of mind for helping him. It's very hard to tell your children not to do what you have done. If you can't show him you love him more than the H then why should he love himself more than H? I'm sure you love him and I know it's not that simple. That s*** takes over your mind so completely it overrides any love for anything. I know and understand that all too well. I'm not far clean myself and some days I'm hanging by a thread but what keeps me going is my daughters face in my mind. It's her voice in my head saying mommy where's daddy? Why haven't I heard from him in months? I'll be damned if she's gonna wonder that her whole life. It's never too late to show them you care.
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Posted: February 10, 2017, 1:11 AM
Welcome johnnyrock...keep fighting the good fight. ..
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Posts: 86
Joined: April 16, 2014
Posted: February 10, 2017, 12:10 PM
Hey, I'm so emotional and can't take this kind of situation. It's really pathetic and really really bad message that your kid is addicted. Please go to a rehab centre asap and treat your kid.
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Posts: 271
Joined: June 27, 2015
Posted: March 23, 2017, 9:38 AM
Hey AWalton. That's pretty harsh of you to say to someone who's trying to reach out for help, advice and or support. And plus there's a lot of other parents on here, mom's and dads who's kids are having trouble battling substance abuse. You should be ashamed of yourself. If you have no clue what good support is that you could offer someone then just keep quiet and only read. No one wants to hear you be judgemental. !
-------------------- IT ONLY GETS WORSE BEFORE IT GETS BETTER.! | ||
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Joined: October 15, 2016
Posted: March 23, 2017, 7:19 PM
I second that Babylove!... couldn't agree more
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Joined: January 4, 2008
Posted: March 24, 2017, 1:03 PM
Dude...babylove is right....if you can't stand the fire here get out of the kitchen. ...
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