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Posts: 1059
Joined: August 11, 2012
Posted: January 9, 2015, 2:34 PM
Na will save your life if you commit to recovery and work a good program. Find a meeting and make some friends. Good luck.
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Posts: 22
Joined: January 2, 2015
Posted: January 9, 2015, 7:07 PM
Im feeling pretty good on day 10-11.
The only thing is I'm having bad blurry vision.....I looked it up and it sounds like it is common for withdrawal. I hope it goes away soon! Its driving me nuts!! | ||
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Posted: January 10, 2015, 12:30 AM
Hey I'm doing better than I thought. Thanks for ur concern. I went to my first na meeting out here near Denver n I felt a natural high after the meeting. The people were so nice n so about recovery n welcomed me with open arms. I've been taking detox meds to help the pain. Haven't used heroin since wed afternoon. I believe I can do this. I need to kick opiates once n for all. So nice to hear from u. Hope ur doing well n staying strong. I think we're going to be ok 😊
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Posted: January 10, 2015, 10:43 PM
Hey Help22. How r u doing? Staying strong I hope. Well I'm on day 3 now. I feel better physically but I can't sleep. Any advice for insomnia? It's making my days/nights drag on forever. Anyway, just wanted to check in with u. Hope ur doing well.
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Posts: 22
Joined: January 2, 2015
Posted: January 11, 2015, 10:51 AM
Hey Will,
I'm doing great! Thank you for checking in. I'm glad to hear you are doing better too! I've been taking a supplement called solus at night to help with the sleep. Give that a shot. I also have a xanax rx that I don't like too much but it will help me sleep too. It is very short acting so I have used it a few times when I couldn't wind down. I'm still having blurred vision. That is probably the worst thing.....thought it was the benzo's at first then I read up that it is really common in withdrawal. Keep strong my friend you can do it! My craving for meds have been zero........you will get there too! I know you can do it! | ||
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Posted: January 11, 2015, 1:35 PM
Hey Help22, thanks for the advice on solus. I'm going to give that a try. I wish I had an Rx for Xanax. No dr will give me a script for any kind of narcotic with my history as a drug addict. But I know that'd help me sleep for sure. Im so glad to hear ur doing well n staying off the opiates. I'm feeling better but it seems everytime I get clean it seems to bring on other ailments. Now I'm having a bad toothache. Never bothered me before cuz the opiates took care of the pain. So now I have to get to a dentist asap. What a nuisance. Anyway, I'm staying strong. Been working on my resume hoping to find a job I can stick with. My employment history isn't too great cuz my addiction kept me from keeping jobs. As long as I'm clean tho I think I'll make a better employee. Thanks for replying. So nice to have a friend on this site I can talk to. I look forward to hearing from u again. Remember to keep it simple, n take it one day at a time 😊
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Posts: 22
Joined: January 2, 2015
Posted: January 11, 2015, 11:07 PM
Hey Will,
Glad to hear your doing alright. My blurred vision has been crazy. I'm thinking of picking up some reading glasses til it passes. I'm heading out for the week for a work meeting and only have access to my cell phone so hopefully I can reach out that way. Keep up the good work my friend it sounds like you are doing great! Take Care, If I don't have a chance to catch up this week I'll get online as soon as I return! Stay strong! | ||
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Posted: January 11, 2015, 11:30 PM
Hey, Help22, thanks for responding. Good luck at ur work meeting. If u need to, u can reach this site on ur phone. Otherwise I look forward to hearing from u when u get back. That's crazy about ur blurred vision. U would think it'd pass by now. Hope it goes away soon. I'm doing all right. Just can't sleep but I'm going to try the solus tonite n hopefully it'll work. Take care, my friend. Stay strong. 😊
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Posted: January 14, 2015, 10:22 PM
Help22, where r u? Miss talking to u. s*** hit the fan last nite. I really screwed up. Please write when u can. Thanks.
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Posts: 90
Joined: December 3, 2014
Posted: January 15, 2015, 9:24 PM
Willowsky, you can talk to me if you need?
Mike | ||
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Posts: 22
Joined: January 2, 2015
Posted: January 17, 2015, 2:51 PM
Hey Will,
I hope this message finds you doing well. I apologize for not being able to reach out this week. We had meetings from 7am-10pm with about 40 minutes worth of breaks in between........long a** week. Please let me know if I can help in any way. I read that you might have had something go on while I was gone. I hope all is well. By the way, I still have the damn blurry vision....I actually picked up a set of reading glasses while at my meeting from the hotel lobby. I'm really ready for this to go away! Please check in when you can Will. By the way I'm almost 3 weeks from my last dose of hyrdocodone and at this stage I have ZERO want for it my friend! You can kick it my friend! I've started to read the book "American Sniper" and it is bad-a**! I could only aspire to have the physical but most importantly the mental strength some of our military has. I suggest you read it if you can! It has helped me focus on mental strength! Bottom line: If you think you can do it, you can do it! I'm here for ya bud, 22 | ||
Posts: 1906
Joined: October 23, 2011
Posted: January 17, 2015, 3:19 PM
I always thought I could drink/drug and get away with it.
The deadliest 3 words in an alcoholics vocabulary is "I was thinking" All the best. Bob R -------------------- Serenity Prayer God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference. Free copy of AA's Big Book on-line: http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/alcoh...olics-anonymous Free copy of NA's Big Book on-line: Copy & Paste coastalcarolinaarea.org/literature/books/b_t.pdf AA's HOW IT WORKS: Copy & paste www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-10_howitworks.pdf NA's HOW IT WORKS: http://www.na.org/admin/include/spa...0it%20Works.pdf ---------------------------------------------------------------- --- driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity. ---there are those too who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest. ... I need AA more than it needs me. --- I fight recovery tooth and nail.... I'm not used to being sane, it just doesn't seem natural. ...... According to the great spiritual teachers, ignorance does not result from what we don’t know; ignorance results from what we think we do know. ---Some think that 2+2=5 and believe it. Some know that 2+2=4 and can't stand it. --- I didn't have a very happy childhood but I sure am having a long one ! ---Dry since 1989 working daily on getting/staying SOBER. ---If you want to drink, that's your business ...If you want to quit, that's AA's business. ... Tell me, I'll forget; ... Show me, I'll remember; ... Engage me, I'll understand. ---Most problems are psychological. Most solutions are spiritual . "If we try to change our ego with the help of our ego, we only have a better-disguised ego." --Richard Rohr WWBWD (What Would Bill W. Do) | ||
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Posts: 22
Joined: January 2, 2015
Posted: January 17, 2015, 7:30 PM
Papa Bear,
I'm not sure I understand your statement? Please clarify! Thanks, 22 | ||
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Posts: 1906
Joined: October 23, 2011
Posted: January 17, 2015, 9:44 PM
You said: "Bottom line: If you think you can do it, you can do it!"
I’m just saying that just because "I think I can do it" I can do it is not legit. If every addict/alcoholic could 'wish" or "think" our way out of this mess there would be no need for AA/NA. All the best. Bob R -------------------- Serenity Prayer God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference. Free copy of AA's Big Book on-line: http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/alcoh...olics-anonymous Free copy of NA's Big Book on-line: Copy & Paste coastalcarolinaarea.org/literature/books/b_t.pdf AA's HOW IT WORKS: Copy & paste www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-10_howitworks.pdf NA's HOW IT WORKS: http://www.na.org/admin/include/spa...0it%20Works.pdf ---------------------------------------------------------------- --- driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity. ---there are those too who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest. ... I need AA more than it needs me. --- I fight recovery tooth and nail.... I'm not used to being sane, it just doesn't seem natural. ...... According to the great spiritual teachers, ignorance does not result from what we don’t know; ignorance results from what we think we do know. ---Some think that 2+2=5 and believe it. Some know that 2+2=4 and can't stand it. --- I didn't have a very happy childhood but I sure am having a long one ! ---Dry since 1989 working daily on getting/staying SOBER. ---If you want to drink, that's your business ...If you want to quit, that's AA's business. ... Tell me, I'll forget; ... Show me, I'll remember; ... Engage me, I'll understand. ---Most problems are psychological. Most solutions are spiritual . "If we try to change our ego with the help of our ego, we only have a better-disguised ego." --Richard Rohr WWBWD (What Would Bill W. Do) | ||
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Posted: January 18, 2015, 7:43 PM
Hey help 22. Glad ur back. Sounds like u had a long week. I f'ed up a few times. Can't seem to get it together. I'm staying with my dad, n last mon he left to go to my brothers house n watch the Ohio State game, since we're all from OH. well I stumbled across some of his percocets n I took them. I ate 2, shot 1, then held onto 2. I never thought he'd notice cuz he doesn't like narcotics. Well the next night he found out n I've never seen him more angry. He trashed my room looking for illegal stuff, screaming at me. It was a crazy side to him. He kept calling me a drug addict, n a liar, n that I'll never change or get my daughter back. I lost custody of her due to a dirty hair follicle test. Anyway, I've been in CO for one week n I've all ready screwed up. Then I did something even crazier. I had a friend of mine back home send me some drugs! Wtf! Crack n heroin. So I did that fri. Then last nite I went to watch my bro's band play, prob had about 10 shots, I was wasted. Pot is legal here so I hit the joint a few times. I've been going to NA n AA meetings but I think I'm going for the wrong reasons. I think im trying to find someone as weak as I am so I can find out where I can get some heroin. I guess I'm gonna fake it til I make it. There's a lot of long term recovery here. People r so damn happy it pisses me off. I'm not happy. Im f'ing angry. I don't even know what to do anymore.
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Posts: 1906
Joined: October 23, 2011
Posted: January 18, 2015, 7:55 PM
If you want what we have you will have to do what we did.
All the best. Bob -------------------- Serenity Prayer God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference. Free copy of AA's Big Book on-line: http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/alcoh...olics-anonymous Free copy of NA's Big Book on-line: Copy & Paste coastalcarolinaarea.org/literature/books/b_t.pdf AA's HOW IT WORKS: Copy & paste www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-10_howitworks.pdf NA's HOW IT WORKS: http://www.na.org/admin/include/spa...0it%20Works.pdf ---------------------------------------------------------------- --- driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity. ---there are those too who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest. ... I need AA more than it needs me. --- I fight recovery tooth and nail.... I'm not used to being sane, it just doesn't seem natural. ...... According to the great spiritual teachers, ignorance does not result from what we don’t know; ignorance results from what we think we do know. ---Some think that 2+2=5 and believe it. Some know that 2+2=4 and can't stand it. --- I didn't have a very happy childhood but I sure am having a long one ! ---Dry since 1989 working daily on getting/staying SOBER. ---If you want to drink, that's your business ...If you want to quit, that's AA's business. ... Tell me, I'll forget; ... Show me, I'll remember; ... Engage me, I'll understand. ---Most problems are psychological. Most solutions are spiritual . "If we try to change our ego with the help of our ego, we only have a better-disguised ego." --Richard Rohr WWBWD (What Would Bill W. Do) | ||
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Posts: 22
Joined: January 2, 2015
Posted: January 19, 2015, 10:28 PM
Hey Will,
It sounds like you have slipped a little. My situation I believe is a little different than yours. I was taking the hydrocodone for low back pain and I started to take more because I was building a tolerance. I got tired of the way it made me feel.....so I decided to quit. I hope I didn't offend anyone by saying if you put your mind to it you can do it. I am currently at the 3 week mark and don't have a need for the medication anymore.....I think my situation was more physical than mental as I have stayed mentally strong and just decided to pitch it. Respectfully, I hope my story helps you my friend. If you want to kick it confide in a friend that will hold you accountable. I hear going to meetings is really helpful too. I am here for you man. Just try and take it one day at a time. You owe it to yourself! Be well | ||
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Posted: January 23, 2015, 3:34 PM
I could not agree more with the whole if you put your mnd to it you can go it. At least when it comes to my abuse of oxys. I'm on my second "cold turkey" attemp. In May of 2014, mentally I had enough of the constant cycle of abuse. I tried to research remedies which would ease the withdrawal process. Yes, somethings were helpful but it was hell. I had abused oxys for over a year and the few days following my last "sniff" were hard BUT I was mentally prepared to stop. I also went on vivitrol which I guess helped me stay clean untill I felt I was clean enough to skip my appointment. After 6 months I relapsed, the whole one won't hurt. It went from few a week to few a day. ONE IS TOO MANY AND A THOUSAND IS NOT ENOUGH. It got out of hand so I decided to attemp to quit again. First day was all about My bones aching and some hot/gold sweats. Day two was about the same as day one. I'm on my third day and experienced some stiffness when I woke up but I feel fine.. Yes I said fine. I can not explain how happy I am that the second time around the withdrawal is not as extreme as the first time. For everyone thinking about taking the step into recovery I would recommend to stock up on bananas, Imodium, vitamin B6, sleeping pills/Xanax, massages and hot baths felt heavenly. You are stronger than your demons. You have the power to gain back the control over you life. You can and you will do this.
This post has been edited by Mink on January 23, 2015, 3:37 PM | ||
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Posted: January 23, 2015, 3:49 PM
The first time I decided to stop using oxys it was simply because I had enough. Over the year of my abuse my tolerance became too expensive to feed. I would wake up in the morning aching and I needed my fix in order to be "normal". My abuse was no longer about getting high but about the fear of withdrawing. I loved to sniff oxys and my abuse was all about the "drip" followed by a smoke. It was a habit so expensive that I was either going to quit or switch to heroin. Thankfully I took the first option. I would wake up telling myself that I hate the monster I became and I need to stop. The pain had such a strong grip on me that I just couldn't do it. One day I just woke up and told myself that is it. I was done with this evil cycle of being an addict. Sadly I relapsed 6 months later but hey I'm trying again. Please all remember. Failure is the act of not trying so as long as you are doing something you are being successful.
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Posted: January 23, 2015, 3:56 PM
Help22 & Mink, Congratulations on your success. I believe your strength and determination were a huge part of this. I hope you both have a good support system. People here are helpful. Live for today clean and stay strong.
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