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Posts: 6374
Joined: January 5, 2008
Posted: May 3, 2012, 9:41 AM
Hi. Lately this board has been really slow.. I know there must be some of you out there who are new to recovery or thinking about recovery and in need of support and are popping in to the board from time to time .please consider posting and together we can build a network of support.. There was a time when this board had a lot of members and we all helped each other through some very difficult times and developed friendships and a good recovery support system. So if there is anyone out there who feel that you might need some understanding and support and looking for a way to recover.. take the leap and post.. you got nothing to lose and a whole lot to gain .............wishing you all a great day and sending you encouragement , strength and HOPE
-------------------- Thank God for what you have. Trust God for what you need | ||
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Posted: May 3, 2012, 12:15 PM
Hey there...thank you for trying to reach out to people....your rt...and I am trying to get a support system in place...I did have 13 yrs soberity once...but that was 10 yrs ago...and 3 treatment centre's...3 sponcer's...a whole handhul of desire chips...1 month chips...and not too many 3 month chips...but i do have a 1 yrs...5 yrs and 10 yrs chip from the past...hoping to get those back!
This is a start...but I did go to detox last night...I had 3 beers yesterday...I am staying in a shelter...I lost lots of stuff thru my addiction...2 kids...my wife...home...cars...licience...bank account...credit cards...friends...family...NO PITY PARTY...LOL I know I have the skill to get some of that back...but my trigger is money...and the taste of beer...thanks for listening | ||
Posts: 577
Joined: February 25, 2009
Posted: May 3, 2012, 12:40 PM
Hi dyingtrying! Welcome to our little corner of the internet!
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Posts: 9248
Joined: December 1, 2005
Posted: May 3, 2012, 12:42 PM
Welcome Trying,
Glad you took that first step, and walked through the fear & posted here. Alcohol is cunning, baffling & powerful and patient. I hope you stick around. Find a meeting today and listen. I found when I hit that bottom where I was so sick & tired of being sick & tired, beat to that point of reasonableness, I walked back into the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous and in doing so, I took a really great suggestion (I didn't realize it at the time) which was that I had no opinions and I was there to listen & learn. Keep coming back. The best thing about recovery is you never have to do it alone. Glad to meet you~ Stacey -------------------- Happiness is not in the bottom of a pill bottle. It's inside you. | ||
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Posts: 6374
Joined: January 5, 2008
Posted: May 3, 2012, 4:24 PM
Hi dyingtrying . welcome to the board. It's amazing isn't it? how this disease robs and always there waiting to take no matter the length of sobriety we've previously had.. I had 19 months of sobriety at one point, went back out on a few binges . I went to reab . a member of AA and now am sober for 20 months...I live in a remote area where AA is not available so most of my recovery is done through the internet and telephone with occasional trips into town for meetings. I am glad you posted and I hope you keep coming back.. Please don't let yesterdays regrets steal tomorrows promises....... Today think of one thing you are grateful for......hugs
-------------------- Thank God for what you have. Trust God for what you need | ||
Posts: 430
Joined: May 5, 2012
Posted: May 5, 2012, 1:45 PM
Hi Pirate, I've been doing a lot of reading today and felt compelled to actually respond to your post. (as I sit here sipping on Merlot). I have always been a loner. I guess my eyes are beginning to open as I see I am not fooling my family and friends anymore. Probably, besides being depressed, fear is my biggest thing. A major eyeopener was my daughter's painful lecture to me. Boy, did she let me have it, and in the most kind, but firm and loving way. She doesn't want her son to be around me if I continue to drink, and she is tired of all the drama that is called my life. I am tired of it too. I know it will be hard. I don't know if I can do it. Frankly, I am scared shi*****.
My husband doesn't know what the problem is, as he can drink responsibly. I don't want to die this way, but I don't know where to begin. I believe in God. For some reason I am affraid to ask Him for help. I am lost. | ||
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Posts: 6374
Joined: January 5, 2008
Posted: May 6, 2012, 5:58 PM
Hi Karraster thank you for posting.. welcome to the board and I am glad you are here.. keep posting and although things are slow on here at the present time it will pick up I am sure.. I pop by every day and so do many others...Our drinking affects not only us but our families as well. even when we don't think it do... I have been there so I have some understanding of how you feel.. Sometimes what we think of as our worst day is in reality our best.. keep coming back... you are among friends ..............
-------------------- Thank God for what you have. Trust God for what you need | ||
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Posts: 430
Joined: May 5, 2012
Posted: October 30, 2012, 12:16 AM
Pirate it's been almost 6 months ago you spoke to me in your "Are you in need of support?" post. There are no words to convey how my life has transformed since I took your advise, or how grateful I am to you for passing on that message. The 12 steps work, I'm living proof, and I've never been so grateful for each new dawn, as I am today. I thought the post that "hooked" me, might bear repeating, in case someone out there is in need of support. One thing I will add, it still tickles me to think of how scared I was to go to my first AA meeting. I mean I laugh out loud.
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Posts: 338
Joined: April 4, 2011
Posted: October 30, 2012, 9:28 PM
Karraster; I remember when you posted about your first meeting. No need to be scared .I remember my first,I sat on the couch in back, hoping I was the invisible man.It was and still is called Happy Hour.both of us are happy now. Today A.A is 2nd only to God on my gratitude list.
If any one is in need of support, don't be afraid of A.A. And keep coming back.Better yet don't leave! Love and hugs. I'm Larry and I Am an alcoholic. Despite what my head says. -------------------- drink? I dont need no stinkin drink | ||
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Posts: 430
Joined: May 5, 2012
Posted: October 30, 2012, 11:29 PM
I had a massive anxiety attack just looking up the locations and scedules of AA meetings. The one most convient to me at that time for location and time said it was a closed meeting. I breathed a sigh of relief because I thought that meant only members could go, so that left me out. Boy, I was jumping for joy, I'd had a reprieve! Within an hour's time that little voice accusing me of being chicken got so annoying I went online again to make sure that closed meeting meant what I thought it meant. I was mistaken, it just meant alcoholics only. Here came the mother of all anxiety attacks, but I went anyway an hour early to boot. There was an old-timer sitting on the bench outside and we talked until meeting time, also it gave me a chance to meet everybody one at a time as they arrived. "There is nothing to fear but fear itself" described my first AA meeting to a tee. I felt foolish for having been scared prior to going, kinda like being chained to the railroad tracks and the train is comming and I'm scared of the people loosening my bonds to set me free.
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Posts: 9248
Joined: December 1, 2005
Posted: October 31, 2012, 11:12 AM
I remember that fear when I decided to go back to AA. See, I had already been a part of AA when my Dad got sober, I was about 11-12 years old, hung out at their functions, remember all the happy faces & laughter. Then when the drinking took me to that black space, I walked back in, shaking & detoxing from alcohol only for my head to assure me I was cured from the alcoholism after about 6 months (I never got a sponsor, never worked the steps, hit a meeting every once in a great while) as the obsession had been lifted. Then I picked up xanax to help me with my anxiety, throw in some Vicoden on top of that for my "bad" back and the topper, Fioricet for my tension "headaches". So, about 5 years after I quit drinking & AA, I had become a full blown junkie, popping so many pills that it was only through the grace of God that I lived. -------------------- Happiness is not in the bottom of a pill bottle. It's inside you. | ||
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Posted: November 9, 2012, 6:56 PM
I am in need of help, I can go thru 100 t3s in 2 or 3 days, also 100 Valium & clonazapam the same, I have health problems which includes pain, I have very bad panic attacks& anxiety. I'm ready 4 help but scared, terrified of going thru detox HELP PLEASE, I have hep c 2 , I'm killing myself....If I run out I feel like I'm going to have a seizure
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Posts: 4174
Joined: July 18, 2006
Posted: November 9, 2012, 10:10 PM
Check the prescription pills forum, Caroline. You may find more common experiences. If you simply want someone to talk to, send an email to: sgramling @ hotmail.com and I will find someone for you to speak to.
-------------------- Faith is not belief without proof, but trust without reservation. | ||
Posts: 1906
Joined: October 23, 2011
Posted: November 9, 2012, 10:58 PM
What Stacey said ...... +1
Caroline, please call your local NA/AA number in the phone book. Many there have been where you are. All the best. Bob R -------------------- Serenity Prayer God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference. Free copy of AA's Big Book on-line: http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/alcoh...olics-anonymous Free copy of NA's Big Book on-line: Copy & Paste coastalcarolinaarea.org/literature/books/b_t.pdf AA's HOW IT WORKS: Copy & paste www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-10_howitworks.pdf NA's HOW IT WORKS: http://www.na.org/admin/include/spa...0it%20Works.pdf ---------------------------------------------------------------- --- driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity. ---there are those too who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest. ... I need AA more than it needs me. --- I fight recovery tooth and nail.... I'm not used to being sane, it just doesn't seem natural. ...... According to the great spiritual teachers, ignorance does not result from what we don’t know; ignorance results from what we think we do know. ---Some think that 2+2=5 and believe it. Some know that 2+2=4 and can't stand it. --- I didn't have a very happy childhood but I sure am having a long one ! ---Dry since 1989 working daily on getting/staying SOBER. ---If you want to drink, that's your business ...If you want to quit, that's AA's business. ... Tell me, I'll forget; ... Show me, I'll remember; ... Engage me, I'll understand. ---Most problems are psychological. Most solutions are spiritual . "If we try to change our ego with the help of our ego, we only have a better-disguised ego." --Richard Rohr WWBWD (What Would Bill W. Do) | ||
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Posted: November 19, 2012, 2:18 PM
hi, i'm sorta desperatley searchin for a way to stop getting high. or someone i can at least talk to. i stay at home by myself all day and count down the hours for my roommate to come home so i wont be alone and thinking about dope. don't know anyone who doesn't use, i need to make friends with clean people.
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Posts: 9248
Joined: December 1, 2005
Posted: November 19, 2012, 2:44 PM
Hi Pattyann,
Welcome. What's your drug of choice? I'm Stacey, a recovering alcoholic & addict, I used and abused anything that would take me out of my uncomfortableness. You're amongst friends here, care to share some more of your story? There is a place where people are seeking recovery rather than the high. Here's the links to find them close to where you are, there are literally millions of people who have been where you are and are now living life, clean & sober and enjoying it. http://www.aa.org/ http://www.na.org Keep coming back. We're here to help. xoxo Stacey -------------------- Happiness is not in the bottom of a pill bottle. It's inside you. | ||
Posts: 45
Joined: September 28, 2012
Posted: November 20, 2012, 6:59 PM
I just feel invisible where ever I go
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Posts: 577
Joined: February 25, 2009
Posted: November 21, 2012, 1:52 PM
Hey Sqibb. I understand. I still feel that way sometimes. And what's funny is that I'm all about isolating myself and not talking to people when I'm feeling low, but at the same time feeling horrible and worthless because I feel like no one is noticing me and how awesome I am! :D
It's that classic alcoholic dichotomy of self-doubt and lack of humility butting heads. Although I'm not great at actually putting it into action, it never fails if I get outside myself (translate: "get OVER myself!) and talk to somebody, I immediately feel better. It's even better if I get off the couch, put on pants and go out in the world to be WITH people who love me like my family or friends! I fail at this many times, but at least I've gotten where I've been honest with enough people in my life that lots of times they'll see what I'm doing and drag me out. It helps that I've made several friends at church who are also alcoholics/addicts. We see right through one another. | ||
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Posts: 45
Joined: September 28, 2012
Posted: November 21, 2012, 7:11 PM
Thanks Yogi
Its just been a tough couple of week with self doubt, you are right. I often feel I live life behind a glass wall and see others living and I am observing. I will get over this feeling I know and preferable sober. Thanks again for your kind words of concern. Mark | ||
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Posted: November 29, 2012, 11:49 AM
hi am very frightened for the first time in 10yrs. had 10 yrs now cant get more than a few days. alot has happened and heavy prices have been paid. i get scared as i see no way out and have to much pressure and reliance on me. i have failed and am sick once again.
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