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Why Do I Feel This Way?!?!
smile_tooken






Posted: January 7, 2008, 6:26 PM
okay so ill have 6 months on friday. :D im really excited but i still feel like i havent hit a bottom. im 16. ive been in the program of NA for 2 years. i feel like i should get this but why does my bottom seem so little? i mean it was to the point where i was using in the back of my class to do schoolwork and things such as that. and then you got them people with their bottom as their kids were born in jail and blah blah blah. so on right?! i dont know. i think im f***ed up in the head. well, every addict does. XD not funny. okay. so then i got this feeling where everything... i dont know. is falling together but then it goes to s***. whats up with that? and another thing. i was 14 when i was put into rehab and i look at the people i was in treatment and most of them are loaded but some are also really good and kept staying clean. what happens is that i c*** a resentment and hate them. yeah i talk and hang out with them but man does it mess with my head. i dont know whats going on. my clean date is july 11 2007. i hope i can stay clean cuz i know i can. ive gone to 7 months and 3 weeks. i can do a full year. and i can keep that year. ive seen it happen. thanks for letting me blab my lips. can someone help me out with all of this???


i do have a sponser and work steps and i call her everyday. im on my 6th step. background info right there.
Bea






Posted: October 12, 2008, 8:28 PM
Hello Smile. I hope that the day has been wonderful. I had a friend who I called Smile. He drowned in a rip tide almost two years ago. I hope you do not mind my posting a note for you.- Betty


Posts: 8683
Joined: April 24, 2007


Posted: October 13, 2008, 6:16 PM
Good for you for your clean time. You maybe feel this way because you're 16 =) and 16 year olds feel all kinds of ways. Let next year take care of itself, work on today...just today. String enough todays together and you've got a month...then...who knows...

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You will not change what you are willing to tolerate.

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Posts: 18
Joined: March 3, 2005


Posted: October 13, 2008, 10:08 PM
I have not been to this site in a year, but I felt a need a few days ago, been looking around and reading posts here and there. I am a Grandma to an addict, and also a Mom to a addict that is able to control at the present time. I was needing to find some sucess stories, and did, but no one has replied to them, or at least most of them. You are 16 and have your whole life ahead of you. Hang on to your sobriety! You have done great. You are saving yourself and family and future family from lots of pain and ruin. The heartache you and your family could go through is indescribable. Smile, hang on!! I did notice that Mom and more responded to you today also. I read her last post on families of addicts, and was touched, I will be checking on her too, she is in alot of pain, as I am . Good luck to you.
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