| post new topic |
Posts: 1
Joined: February 13, 2009
Posted: February 13, 2009, 9:05 PM
I used drugs recreationally like most of the young guys do and stopped using after college.
I had a very organized life as a professional and business owner for more than 15 years. One night I decided to go to a club with some friends and had a few beers. When the bar closed I felt like having a few more beers and I invited a young man I met at the bar to my place. We were having a very nice dialogue about finances and businesses which was very interesting. Between beer and beer the young man pulled out from his pocket a small bag with tiny rock like things inside. When I realized it was Crack I was terrified at first. I have tried many drugs when I was younger but not Crack. The young man smoked some of it in front of me and asked me if I wanted to give it a try and I said yes without knowing what I was getting into. When I tried Crack it unleashed a monster within me. We spent that whole night smoking it until we finished his supply wish was considerable. Since that very first hit I became obsessed with the drug. I spent aproximately $50,000 during the first 3-4 months of my new addiction. My Crack dependency lasted for several years, years of pure hell. My family tried to help and sent me to a very expensive 12 step rehab and then relapsed. They took me to another rehab and relapsed again and kept repeating the same cycle over and over again. I sold most of my furniture and electric appliances, prescription pills to get money, also robbed my family a few times too. I did terrible things in order to have my fix of Crack. I was in very bad shape, my skin tone was gray, I lost 60 pounds. I felt like if I was going to die anytime. Thanks to my Higher Power one day my brother called me up and told me about a rehab that has a totally new approach for addictions and that they had a written version of their treatment available. So I got the book and got continuous treatment with a Psychiatrist and Pshychologist both specialized in addiction. After that I had one more short relapse and that was it. I am done with drugs, they disgust me. With the help of the book reinforced by my therapists, I found out what was the underlying cause of my addiction. Once I truly realized that, the cravings diminished until completely gone. I found out that the reason for my addictive behavior relied a lot on my low self esteem and feelings of powerlessness. Crack made me feel very powerful and self confident. Now I have learned not to rely on external things to feel confident and powerful. With major changes in my way of thinking I regained all the self confidence that once I gave away. I have been clean and sober for a long while and share a beautiful life with my parents. I want to give them back all the unconditional love and support they gave me when I was in need. I am also studying Psychology focused on Addiction to be able to help other addicts and their relatives. | ||
|
| post new topic |