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Message Board > Families / Partners of Addicts > Always Come Back Here

Posted by: momg November 3, 2020, 4:44 PM
So last few years 37 year old son in and out of jail, he was a heroin user, now he is a whacked out paranoid, delusional meth user. Year after year

Posted by: mtnmom November 3, 2020, 5:15 PM
Welcome Momg, I'm so sorry you are here, but welcome to the crazy train our kids insist on pulling us into! This is a great group to vent, chat, share problems & ideas & to have moral support in an anonymous forum where NO ONE will judge you or your son. We have and are walking in your shoes. Feel free to share anything

Posted by: momg November 3, 2020, 5:22 PM
Thank you it’s been years here off and on. Just sucks the life out of you

Posted by: NyToFlorida November 3, 2020, 8:30 PM
after many years thinking and hoping and wishing that my son's recovery is just around the corner, I am still waiting and hoping that something will trigger him to stay in recovery. It does suck the life out of life.

Posted by: Wednesday November 4, 2020, 1:07 AM
Welcome momg. Glad you found your way here. The people on here are really supportive. Your not alone in feeling drained all the time. I have my good days and bad for sure. My daughters keep me getting out of bed each day. They motivate me to not give in to the depression. They are the one good thing in my life right now. My son has relapsed recently and my girls are showing sighns of depression and stressed from the most recent down turn in their brothers addiction. It's such a multitude of emotions. Happy he has completed treatment,happy to see him again and then the great sadness when he relapsed. I prepared myself for the possibility but I think the girls really had their hopes up. My oldest is getting rashes on her face. Can't figure it out. Allergies? Then I thought maybe from the stress she has been under. My youngest has admitted to having PTSD symptoms. They have both agreed to counselling.thankfully . The never ending stress and the always ongoing situations takes its toll. Having to dig up strength when you may not have any . It's all relatable. I hope you find strength and comfort here when you need it.🐝.

Posted by: NyToFlorida November 4, 2020, 9:53 AM
Wednesday, you have reminded me that each year my son has gone to a rehab or program and has stayed in recovery for one to 5 months at a time. Though I am disappointed, that life is not picture perfect, I can only hope he is learning something each time he goes. This year he has checked himself into detox about 3 times.

My husband and I used to ‘problem solve’ everything until we got to the point where there was nothing we hadn’t tried.

Posted by: Wednesday November 4, 2020, 2:43 PM
Nytoflorida I do believe that they do learn each time they are in treatment.their heads are cleared from the drugs and its when they go back to it that they lose their mind again. But I also worry that these drugs they are taking are not what they used to be, They are not just one substance. It's a bunch of crap that should not be in the human body. These chemicals I worry will do permanent damage to their brains and when they stop taking them are they going to be the same.? I know here in canada the drug supply is completely contaminated with other substances like fentinal. You cannot get straight heroine ,straight meth,there is not one drug that is clean of other substances. So the info I read about drugs is not actually the truth because they don't know what is in the drugs so how can we expect to know the long term side effects or permanent damage scares me to think of this. I get really upset that this epidemic of drug induced human beings are just ignored by our government. This is a health crisis that will effect millions of people not just the addicts but everyone in society. Not only does my addict son need medical help but now I need it,my daughters need it. And the government continues to ignore this health crisis. I can only hope and pray our loved ones come out of this at all. Is your son in detox now? If so that is good news. It's that brief moment of clarity when they are not on drugs that we can see the real them and gain some hope. Know you are a good parent and you are doing your best. 🐝 We are all just doing our best.

Posted by: NyToFlorida November 5, 2020, 11:44 PM
Drug addiction hurts every part of existence. It really is overwhelming. families, people, relationships. Financially, drug abuse bankrupts individuals and families. We kept helping our son for years, eventually I saw that it didn’t matter how much or how little we helped. His addiction didn’t change. We got to the point where we were suffering, our finances, our health. We had to stop.

I know you all know this but I want to point out that drug addiction directly and indirectly hurts everyone, even if they do not have an addict in their family. They drive up insurance rates because of car accidents and doctor and hospital visits, rehab stays, detox, lab tests, dental work.
The amount of stealing from families, neighbors, each other, businesses, and services where they use up professional people’s time as they are trying to manipulate something. Injuring others by accident or on purpose. Filling up jails and court houses. Stealing from their jobs costing time and expenses from employers adding unnecessary drama to employers when they create chaos or don’t show up

My son ended up in jail for 4 months in 2019. He went to a recovery place for 2 months, then went to a shelter in nyc. The shelter helped him apply for Medicaid, food stamps, he might have been able to take a vocational class but COVID hit and the schools closed. He was on a list for housing. He was working part time for a recovery center. Then COVID hit and the recovery center became a food bank.

I know my son has had all opportunities to stay in recovery, all he has to do is show up and follow through. I think he does not want to be sober. I think he does not put 100% effort into recovery. Or getting out of homelessness.

Posted by: axor001 November 13, 2020, 11:28 PM
Welcome momg.