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Message Board > Marijuana > 2 Days Sober After 5 Years

Posted by: Margret October 14, 2015, 10:08 PM
Hey! I don't speak English as my first language so I hope you can understand me. I think it's great that people can write their story's here because it really helps reading what other people, who are going through the same thing, has shared.

I'm 24 years old and started smoking weed around 20. At first it was only the weekends, then it was only the evenings but then it was before, during, and after work everyday. I started to use it because I can NEVER sleep and suffer from anxiety. This was the only thing that worked for me. I would never have gotten as far as I am today without weed. But it's illegal, expensive and it's hard to hide it all from my family. That's why I want to change.

It's been 26 hours since my last joint. I haven't been eating or sleeping and the night sweats are arriving. I'm so lonely all the time, and i'm just sitting around doing nothing because I can't. I can't concentrate, nothing can catch my attention, -i'm just numb and sad. I can't get any support from my friends and family because they don't know about the situation and i'm not going to tell them. They have never noticed that i'm stoned. I go to a University and can't even do my work there when I'm not smoking. I can't go to AA meeting (I don't think we have MA where I live) because I live in a so small country somebody would know me and things would get out. I don't care if the person is a addict themselves, I still don't want them to know that I am.

I'm sorry, maybe this message board isn't for posts like this one, but I just had to let it out.
I hope you all will find peace and destroy the addiction. We are stronger!

Posted by: Sammy72 December 19, 2015, 3:12 AM
I KNOW exactly how you feel!! and since weed is becoming "ok" to smoke, its harder not to justify. I am 43, i smoked from 16-20 and had no problem quitting for some reason (quality change maybe) now i've been smoking for 8 years until 3 days ago. I tried in the summer and cut my usage down to almost nothing but before i knew it i was using heavily again. I felt almost suicidal when i quit like no one understood how horrible it was, it really bothers me when people say its not addictive because it is!!! i am walking proof, it is NOT mind over matter, if that was the case we wouldn't be getting the physical effects we do. I don't know if i will be much help but a few things i've learnt....if u were to smoke right now, you WILL regret it and wont enjoy the high, instead you will be kicking yourself for doing me. Second is to get rid of EVERYTHING!!! delete numbers where u can get it, tell people who u got it from NOT to enable you and say no if u ask. If you don't have the temptation it is easier. The feelings you have are VERY normal and i can SO relate and thinking smoking again will take it away, won't. It's something you have to pat yourself on the back for everyday you go without it. It builds your confidence, as well as makes you realize you can do it. Do you have any anti anxiety meds to temporarily take in the meantime to help? that helps me when i feel i can't take it. I remember sitting in a field during the summer feeling so low i didn't want to live anymore, and all that from weed! quitting weed shouldn't make you not want to live anymore, but it does and no one tells you that when you start! it's all fun and games until you do what we both did and can't control our intake. I WISH i could be an occassional smoker, but it's simply not possible for me. I'm not sure what else to say because your emotions will take over anything i've said, honestly as everyday passes, it's another day closer to be drug free.