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Message Board > Other Addictions > Im A 29 Year Old Prostitute.


Posted by: Guest_Danielsmomma March 5, 2004, 3:43 PM
i havent looked yet but i am hoping someone else in here has or had this problem of mine..first off, i am a MAJOR CRACKHEAD. that is why i turned to prostitution...i cant stand doing what i do for money but it is definetely an addiction...even if i wasnt smoking crack, prostitution is a very easy thing to get hookedon..anyone else know what im talking about? although i only do oral...i know that bad things can still happen and i can still get a disease...i really just am looking for someone who is in the same situatiopn as i am...someone who knows what im talking about..the easy money addiction..its not easy to stop..i mean i meet with someone and within 10 minutes, ive got a pocketful; of cash....how do i get away from this?

Posted by: Dr.jekell & Mr.Hyde March 5, 2004, 3:59 PM
It takes a lot of courage to express yourself. I tip my hat off to you. Prostitution and crack addiction go hand in hand when the fianances dry out and everbody turns there back to you. It's not easy braking out of that cycle '' the easy money and the quick hit '' First of all you should rid your problem of addiction that leads to your prostitution. And prostitution altoghter when you have cleaned up. There are many services in Canada that can help you... But your first step should be to detox for several days, then check yourself into a rehab center, once that cycle is completed look into a goverment assistance programe that can help you survive daily while you search for employment. If you are not already employed, which I assume your not at this point.
Good Luck and don't give up....

'' Keep me posted ''
Dr.Jekell

Posted by: matron March 12, 2004, 10:16 AM
the only person that can help you is yourself doll

Posted by: hollyhooker May 3, 2004, 10:09 AM
*post removed by moderator

Posted by: JM May 3, 2004, 12:38 PM
Danielle's Momma,


Prostitution is illegal. And, so is crack cocaine. I'd suggest getting rehab for your drug problem. And if you don't stop now, you could be dead soon. And if you get caught with crack, or prostituting, it's going to make it 10 times more worse for you. It's going to be 10 times harder to get a job, since it's hard for people with a record to get a job. That's really something to think about. Also, Diseases are another concern. You'll find life so much more enjoyable and easier, once you are clean from crack cocaine, and done prostituing.

Posted by: Gordon May 3, 2004, 9:52 PM
*post removed by moderator

Posted by: LostSoul May 3, 2004, 9:59 PM
I don't think she needs anyone to put her down if she took the time to admit her problem and reach out for help.

Go to rehab. Take it one day at a time after that...

Some want you to fail, many hope you succeed!

Good luck and God Bless you!

Posted by: uniqueness1970 June 25, 2004, 4:24 PM
hi. I know that dmitting your problems was difficult. I am an ex prostitute. and a recovering crack addict. First of all know one thing..if you really only do oral(i doubt) then know thatif you keep using you will eventually lower what is acceptable to you. Youwill do things you never dreamed of.and be so ashames and it lends to the viscious cycle. You will continue to use to deal with the choices you are making....if you do not die. During my active addiction i watched girls die from overdose, lungs collapsing and heart exploding from bad dope. I was in Jacksonville during the early 90's and there was a serial rapist who only targeted prostitutes. i read in paper about my friends bieng found torured and dead inthe woods. I have been beaten, shot, gang raped and i am one of the lucky ones. Sweetie, statistically we do not make it..so fight...like you are fighting for your life...because you are..i am here if you need me.
AND TO HOLLYHOOKER you are aliar...to yourself...you do not like the pleaseure. you are seeking your validation and self worth through the acceptance and desire that men show you. You have low self esteem and want to be loved and accepted more than annything and yyou are doing whatever it takes to feel love..if just momentarily. Shame on you for trying to encourage negative behavior when this girl is asking for help.
tammi

Posted by: habitstv August 10, 2004, 6:58 PM
Your story is so sad. I hope you can get yourself out of the cycle/ Easy money is really never eay in the end.

I am working on a show about addiction. would you be interrested in telling us t your story and explaining to others how easy it is to fall into a trap and how hard it is to get out.

Bless you.
. Please contact us at 818 728 6609 or habitstv@aardvarkpost.com

Posted by: Danielsmomma September 2, 2004, 9:02 PM
to habitstv...you can e mail me at manicmess@hotmail.com...lostsoul, thank you fopr caring...im doing much better..3 weeks clean as of yesterday!

Posted by: heroin girl September 6, 2004, 5:34 PM
Danielle'smomma

Careful, do not allow yourself to be exploited by some whose intentions are less than honorable.

Best of luck,

Heroin Girl

Posted by: Danielsmomma November 30, 2004, 12:27 PM
havent been over here in awhile...i have 11 days clean from crack and prostitution...it feels great...i dont know exactly what hollyhooker had said because it said the post was removed so i am guessing it was something negative...feels good to be starting to get my life back together...thanks to all, who posted on my topic..good luck to you ....Unique, thanks for your post as well...you are right when you say the majority of US dont make it...glad to get out of that while i can...thanks for caring..lottsa love/

Posted by: monsterkitty December 3, 2004, 5:09 PM
Im just a lurker on this board. I usually post on the prescription drug board. I read your story and I think you are a very strong person to have quit. No-one aspires to be a prostitute and no-one aspires to be hooked on drugs of any kind. Im glad to know that you have been clean for a while. I know its hard. I have a current addiction to Xanax. Good luck to you and have a happy holiday.

Anna

Posted by: Danielsmomma December 6, 2004, 11:55 AM
lottsa love and hope going your way anna.stay strong and thank you for your post...danielsmomma

Posted by: Ryan December 21, 2004, 4:54 AM
I am in the same place as you. 28, been a prostitute for 5 years. various addictions I can control for a while then they come back. Meth and alcohol are big ones. The money is too hard to leave. I have tried other jobs, but I end up back hooking again and doing porn videos. I know it's bad, and I still do it, I cannot escape it. I can't get a good job becuase I dropped out of college and have no real work experience. I know how you feel, "the Golden handcuffs" as someone said.

Posted by: hollywooddark Star December 21, 2004, 5:23 AM
I wanted to say to, to the people who say, just stop, just get a job. Like it is that easy. When you have rent and bills due and need money to eat. Like many I have bought nice things to compensate for the loss of my soul. A nice car with car payments and a beautiful condo, wonderful products, and clothes, Health insurance and other things, so that my life appears nice. But when people say just get a job, get out of it, those are the ones who really don't get it. When you haven't had a job in 5 years, and no work refernces, you can't just "get a job". So you go out looking for one for a week or two, busting your a** getting your fake resume done professionally, getting conservative nice suits, looking the part. People are impressed at first, but without any real job experience they never call. Even though I run my own six figure business, and do it professionally and well, I can't even get a job selling cell phones, because you can't prove it. All the VIP important clients I have that run studios and large businesses in Hollyuwood, when I asked them for help, I got the "I'll see what I can do" story. Just a w**** to them, even though they told you you were more. If you saw me in the grocery store, you would think I was a young professional, ivy league grad. I come from a respected family, went to a few years at a good college, I have a natural charisma and am told how classy and gentlemanly I am. But it's all a shell. My image looks great. Good looking, good honest person, no criminal record, very high FICO score. excellent credit, regular friends, nice new european luxury car, beautiful condo, perfect skin and teeth. But I am a prostitute who cannot escape. Waiting tables I get treated worse then I ever have being a high class hooker. I escape with binges in private with meth, GHB, and other easily obtained escapes. No ones knows. I am tired of the double life. I envy my friends with real jobs, and they don't get it. I am on high levels of anti-depressants, and love Xanax because I can cope then. When people say how much better I am than this, and how I'm not the type of person who would be doing this I laugh inside. There are all types, trashy to classy, from rich and poor families. Caught in the cycle. People think they could tell, but you can't. We are your friends, neighbors, relatives, the guy who holds a door for you, the guy you wish your sons would be like. Because the image is good, but the reality is hell. What will I do soon? I can't do this for much longer. Most of us, are just too nice of people, and can't do a jopb that takes advantage of people, but we are willing to hurt ourselves. And unless you have been it, and in it, you'll never get it. My hope now, is to finsih school, or find a man to get married to and be a housewife/man. But the harsh reality is, the one that you cry to sleep over many times, is that everyone wants to sleep with you, but no one wants a relationship with a w****. No matter how god of a person you are, you get treated like damaged goods. The quality men want other quality men. I guess I would too. I know I would be a great husband if someone beautiful and nice would save me. I can have sex with the hottest men in LA., and do. But they never stick around, they can never deal with my life and what I do. So I listen to the music ...."and in your darkest hour, did you ever hear me sing"... good soulful music and my dog are the only things that keep me going. And I'm not the only one.

Posted by: Danielle December 26, 2004, 5:44 PM
I've never been a prostitute, but I CAN relate...

I've worked as a dancer for 12 years (in the business for 13). I am 32 yrs old. I am a junior in college with a 3.5 average, an IQ in the top .5% of the nation, am married to a man who makes over $60,000 a year.....

I am also addicted to pain pills, bipolar, and addicted to the "quick money"..... I live in a beautiful home and drive a $40,000 car, but live from one bill to another. I have no extra money for anything when I don't dance.....

I hate the way dancing makes me feel.... I used to think it was empowering, I used to love the way men threw themselves at me... But as I get older (and wiser) and see them throwing themselves at EVERY SINGLE GIRL THERE, from the Barbie Dolls to the trashy ones, I realize that they could have cared less about ME.....

I'm trying to quit, but in many ways it's harder than drugs..... I just got done working an Internship for a successful company and made only $8.50 an hour - that's about $250 a week.... I can make that- $1000 a night dancing..... How do you get out of this kind of lifestyle??????????????

Good luck with this...... You are on the right track with realizing you want a better life... You are in my prayers...

Posted by: Joel January 1, 2005, 1:05 PM
Prostitution is a lifestyle of low self esteem, no self respect, and crack cocaine allows one to forget about how you have thrown away your life. One feeds off of the other. When you can justify selling your soul, and a lifestyle of crack and prostitution is doing just that. My ex girlfriend is an escort(prostitute) and crack addict. She gave up her kid, me and a pretty easy life to live in a fantasy world which will eventually come crashing down on her. As the looks fade, and the money dwindles, age takes over, you will be replaced by younger women, you will have no pension, no social security, nothing. The risks involved with prostitution and crack are huge. The game, as it is called, wont allow you to win. The odds are stacked against you from the git go. You don't have any love in your life, because you don't know how to love yourself. You are going now where fast. Think about being 40 and still doing this........50.......who will want you?

Posted by: mommyof2angels May 10, 2005, 2:23 PM
I have almost gotten into dancing, I had friends who were and they kept asking me to come work with them, I talked to the manager twice but I kept backing out because I am devoted to my husband and knew this would hurt him. I have done most drugs, had sex with many, a very destructive behavior. I have heard this line so many times and rolled my eyes and went back to doing my same destructive life but when my husband threatend to leave me I stopped and took a good look at my life. I have done alot to destroy it. I am slowly but surely letting go of things that I feel are not good for me. Nobody is perfect and everyone will fight addictions in different ways. The only clear thing to me is getting a close personal relationship with god. I enjoy life alot more. Yes its like a rollercoaster and I fight some things and others I dont. I believe as long as I have my faith and pray I can do it. I always was focused on how can I look better, and worried about what I was doing wrong and how I could help eveyone else but that is being assuming and it never works. I just screwed myself. The more you give yourself to god, the more you will understand about how temporary life is and how all this crap is worthless and will do nothing for you. I have also turned to working out and kickboxing and its fun. I always wanted to do that but made excuses why I couldnt.

Posted by: bumpnbad May 10, 2005, 5:24 PM
Bless you all! but for the grace of God there go I...I offer up prayers for your hard life and pray that one day you can escape from the lifestyle. I'm no prize either, i am an iv coke user and have given sex for drugs, so I'm really not much different than you.

I pray that y'all find the answers that you seek, the peace in your life and the freedom from your addictions.

Posted by: scubablt May 26, 2005, 7:44 PM
cc

Posted by: brit June 8, 2005, 6:16 PM
Hey Daniellesmoma,
I was sad for you when I read your post. I am tracking this site
because I am truly interested in your recovery.
Congratulations for coming off of the crack and stopping prostitution.
You should be very proud of yourself.
I have no background knowledge in crack or prostitution, I am studying to be
an addictions councillor.
I come to this site so that I can get real life knowledge from people
like you. I love to follow recoveries!. It makes me proud to be part of yours.
I hope that is okay with you.
Take good care of yourself, because you are worth it.
Karen

Posted by: Lee June 9, 2005, 7:14 PM
Dear Danielle, the Prostitute,

I hope all is going well with you and you are sticking to your rehab and new life. I hope the pressure of needing 'Quick and EZ" cash has not forced you back onto the street corners and sleazy hotel bedrooms for that EZ money. How about it dear lady, are you staying clean.... off the Crack and off the Beds? I pray so.

Please post again soon and let us all know so we will know how to help you, OK? We really do care. By the way, how long did you prostitute yourself out to the scummy men who sinfully took advangtage of you? I blame them more than you -- if they did not leave their wives at home with the kids, go out slumming and cruising in their expensive cars as 'Johns' looking for cheap, EZ, fun, exciting, hot, quick sex and perverse sexual acts, you would not have to battle the temptation being played out every night on the streets of America. What battle? The battle to provide the "Johns" with the physical-sexual-service they desire so badly. Right?

Sweetie, you are actually a victim when it comes to the prostitution.... I feel strongly about that statement! Why? Well, it is simply a matter of the 'ole economic rule and principle called the: 'The law of supply and demand." Isn't that right or correct? Don't you agree with me? Think about this: If the demand was not there from the sinful Johns, then you would not have to give up yourself, your virginity, body, etc., as part of or as a "piece of" the supply that helps feed the demand. So, you have my sympathy... truly you do. I blame the nasty old Johns for taking advantage of you and the other ladies of the night who walk the street providing the supply for the demand.

Keep the Faith, hang in there, and keep fighting to overcome the addiction to both Crack and Prostitution. Please post soon to let us know how it is going.

Lee

Posted by: elsie July 24, 2005, 3:14 PM
I have been down the same road you have. I am addicted to crack and about half the money I would spend on it would be from prostitution. The rest would be money I would steal. But with prostituting it feels like an easy fix. Low on cash, just find a guy, make him feel special for a while and then have money. But your better then that and you shouldn't have to give up your dignity for this drug. You should seek help for the crack addiction and realize that you are better then that.

Posted by: heidi July 25, 2005, 1:58 PM
Hope things are going well for yu!

H,

Posted by: jesusking August 3, 2005, 7:06 PM
I feel compelled to answer this post because I was also a dancer for 7 years. During that time I was a drug addicted fiend. Everything from Coke to Crystal. I will not lie and say I didn't have a fabulous time in some of my exploits but there were horrible times, disgusting times and scary times. I also escorted and ran my own service in Sacramento but I got so addicted to meth, I left and ran away to a worst fate in New Orleans. I lost my daughter during that time period and I did lots of things I never thought I would ever do. The next 2 years were sadness and pure joy...I can't explain it...it just was. After that was a struggle for my sanity. I finally cleaned up for the most part. Jesus helped me through even though I did relapse more than once. Jesus brought me a wellness business, a great guy and a new baby. I am now clean and am loving my new life. I still think about my old life and miss it at times but I know there are better things waiting for me. Jesus heals if you let him and my new family and my new business keeps me busy and happy. I miss the fast money and even my job because I was really good at what I did...and even enjoyed it. I love to dance and being nude wasn't a turn-off for me but the drugs were always there tempting me and I couldn't say no. The drugs were apart of my "Sunshine" persona so I had to leave. I am happy now with my new life and thank God I am not dead. My 13 year old daughter is happy with me and wouldn't trade any of it for anthing inthe world. I am free.

Dawn from San Jose, Ca

http://www.themomteam.com/cgi-bin/mom.cgi?id=Da377467&action=show

melapower@aol.com

Posted by: Julie September 25, 2005, 9:08 AM
During my active Crack addiction i also become addicted to prostitution, initially i was afraid then i felt empowered by the control i had over my punters, the quick way to earn a pocketful of drug money.
I started off just doing oral, then within weeks was doing pretty much whatever was required in the beginning always using a condom to not even caring about that as long as i got paid. in fact it was a service i charged extra for.
I prostituted for just over 2 years during that time i got raped,beat,robbed,tied up and held hostage i was attacked with mace and a punter also pulled a knife on me once. I was arrested for loitering and common prostitution 86 times.
Then i got a boyfriend/pimp who abused me worse than anyone else, i was controlled by fear and my addiction my self esteem hit bottom and i was actually starting to enjoy the attention i was getting from the punters, sometimes i even gave oral in return for small amounts of money so that i could buy food after days of bingeing on crack.
I havnt used crack or prostituted myself in a little over 14 months now, and for me prostitution is a trigger of my using, when i first got clean i became obsessed that every man knew i was a hooker which was complete rubbish now and then a car will still pull in the kerb as i walk along the road sometimes i long to jump in, but that would be throwing my life away, my using was centered around the sex industry if i wasnt doing punters i was having sex with my bf or other prostitutes this fuelled the guilt and shame that gave me the excuse to use again and again.
My sponsor was really wonderful when i shared with her that a part of me missed it, i felt so ashamed that i actually thought i liked it, enjoyed it but as i looked a little deeper i realised that it was just my disease trying to break my defenses so that i would use.
By a miracle from God not only am i alive and clean today i am also free of any disease i was convinced i was HIV or that some other disease was eating me up through my sexual activity. I am more grateful to be alive than i can express in words, of all the girls i worked the street with i am the only one who made it back, i pray for them and sometimes i cry for them late at night when i know that they are out there suffering and that i am powerless to do anything other than carry my message and hope that it may help to change one life.
Thanks for letting me share

Posted by: jackofhartzz September 25, 2005, 9:47 AM
I never used the services of a prositute but thru the years of heroin addiction,I saw plenty of you out there.
That is one of the most dangerous ways to make a few dollars I,ve ever seen. The maniacs who jump in and out of your lifes can remain faceless and namless. They have all kinds of issues that lead from sick behavoir to severe violence
Find a group and look to get out of that life as soon as you can- if you have an ounce of self-esteem left, summon it up!!

get it together-good luck!!!
jack

Posted by: transformation November 5, 2005, 4:58 PM
Hi there,my names Rita,i'm a 38 year old transexual hooker from london,i'm also a drug addict addicted to injecting heroin and crack into my groin cos all my veins are mashed up.I make loads of money by selling my A... to politicians and judges and top people in society.I'm so ashamed of what i do but i just cant seem to stop.It's tearing me up inside,i,m HIV positive and i,ve had sex with all these people.What the hell am i gonna do,we're all gonna die.What the F... am i gonna do?

Posted by: brit November 5, 2005, 8:48 PM
Hey Rita, well you have done the first big step, admitting that you have a problem. I think that you should post on the Heroin board, in my experience they are the most compassionate and caring people you will find.
Please come and tell your story over there, you will get more help than you could ever imagine, through all the ups and down they will be there for you.
Take care.
Karen

Posted by: Bob3022 February 15, 2006, 10:23 PM
Hello. How RU doing these days? Please post soon and let us know how you are, OK? We care for you and we are pulling for you to make it.

Bob

Posted by: Manic maniac February 23, 2018, 11:55 AM
Danielsmomma now 43 years old and still on and off the crack. I stopped prostituting have a good job and my own place. Cut back alot but still struggle daily

Posted by: Abigalmay June 5, 2018, 9:00 PM
If it wasn't for the drug addiction, Id say keep hooking until you save about 10,000, fix your credit, and then get a legit job. However, with the drugs, it's much harder because that's your money going out the window. When people say "just get a real job", it makes me want to say to them "just get a real education" because they obviously cannot do math! Most people cannot afford even a small, one bedroom apartment on 10 dollars an hour, yet alone healthcare, bills, and food unless they have a partner working or get help from family members or the gov. I wish the USA would grow a brain and get healthcare for all, and raise the minimum wage to at least 15 an hour. Then we wouldn't be facing these problems.