Day #6 And 6am
Posted: September 24, 2018, 9:15 AM


Posts: 6230
Joined: January 5, 2008



Congrats on 61 days wishing.. Hope you are continuing on in your recovery journey with enthusiasm , positive thoughts and an attitude of gratitude. Be proud of your accomplishments.

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Thank God for what you have. Trust God for what you need
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Posted: September 24, 2018, 11:35 PM


Posts: 67
Joined: July 25, 2018



Well hello, hello, and hello!

Wishing here just letting you know I'm continuing with my sobriety from that poison called alcohol.

I'm starting to forget about many day's it's been. July 19th was my last drink...

it's like 66-67-68 something like that. I know if i called my grandpa he'd know as he's keeping a log lol Which i find very funny and sweet of him :)

I haven't forgot about you guy's and actually thought about you guy's a couple times within the past couple day's telling myself that I haven't been on lately. I hope they don't think i fell off the wagon... lol

Welp I didn't .. Sober!

Thank you to all,

Love ,

Wishing
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Posted: September 24, 2018, 11:52 PM


Posts: 67
Joined: July 25, 2018



Idgie

WATER WATER WATER MY BEST FRIEND
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Posted: October 1, 2018, 11:24 PM


Posts: 67
Joined: July 25, 2018



I'm still doing it!

:)

Love,
Wishing
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Posted: October 2, 2018, 8:18 AM


Posts: 2246
Joined: March 23, 2006



Hey Wishing
Woohoo you are doing it one day at a time.

just got home from an AA meeting about half hour ago so doing my late night wind down. 10.30pm is late for me these days haha.

Feeling so happy and grateful to be alive.

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Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Matthew 6:27

May the Force be with you.

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should just get used to the idea....Robert Heinlein.

You can spend the next 24 hours reaching your true potential or sliding down into your own particular hell. the choice is always yours.
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Posted: October 2, 2018, 8:12 PM


Posts: 6230
Joined: January 5, 2008



Good on you Wishing! keep up the good work...JUST ONE DAY AT A TIME...

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Thank God for what you have. Trust God for what you need
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Posted: October 7, 2018, 10:50 AM


Posts: 67
Joined: July 25, 2018



Hi Guys,

I love coming back to replies from everyone it means so much to me :)

Today is day number #81 I have a few milestones coming up the 90 days/ 3 months is around the corner and the good sounding number of 100 not to far away.

I'm thankful for not waking up from alcohol withdraw and needing alcohol to do things on a daily.
I'm thankful for my family and all the support I get as it's 1 day at a time but I'm reminded daily of my accomplishments of how many day's it's been.

Side note: I know I'm not out the woods yet and it's really that much of a physical thing for me . It's more or less a mental thing for me now. It's like the thought just lingers of how much more fun things can be if drinking and how much better I'll feel.

I say SHUT UP DEVIL! With those lies.. I will not feel better as I know how I felt in that hospital bed with blood pressure at 190 /110 and a high pulse shaking s***ting blood and checking myself into a free rehab in which when i showed up it was a homeless rehab and more or less like a jail which was crazy....

Sooo no thank you. I'd rather stay in the lane that i'm in and continue cleansing my liver with water.

I'm thankful for getting back some willpower

Love,
Wishing

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Posted: October 8, 2018, 5:43 AM


Posts: 2246
Joined: March 23, 2006



You go wishing!!!!

So awesome that you have that support. I related to what you said about the lies.

I said something similar to myself a lOT in the early days. That I don't need to listen to lies anymore - especially the lies my own head was telling me!!!!

For me, ANY thought or idea or fantasy that a drink might be a good idea is simply no more or less than a TOTAL LIE. And I trade in the truth these days. Some might say the truth hurts, but I say "the truth will set you free" it certainly set me free from the slavery of the bottle.

cheers to you wishing.

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Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Matthew 6:27

May the Force be with you.

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should just get used to the idea....Robert Heinlein.

You can spend the next 24 hours reaching your true potential or sliding down into your own particular hell. the choice is always yours.
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Posted: October 8, 2018, 2:10 PM


Posts: 6230
Joined: January 5, 2008



Wishing ..Every time you post with your progress it makes me feel proud of you. I am your cyber cheerleader lol.. Good on you for continuing with recovery and being committed. You are doing AWESOME...

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Thank God for what you have. Trust God for what you need
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Posted: October 11, 2018, 1:57 AM


Posts: 67
Joined: July 25, 2018



Hi Guy's !

Thank you very much for the replies back to me . I loved them! lol @ cyber cheerleader :)

I'm just getting ready for bed and just checking in before I put on the movie La Bamba
and fall asleep.

Oh and one last thing. I was out the other night and this guy smelled like booze .
I now see what my mom meant by i smell like booze in the past.
Disgusting!

Love,
Wishing
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Posted: October 17, 2018, 9:29 AM


Posts: 67
Joined: July 25, 2018



90 days !!!
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Overfifty55
Posted: October 17, 2018, 6:35 PM







Woo hoo 90 days is fantastic!! Congratulations 🎉🎊
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Posted: October 18, 2018, 7:12 AM


Posts: 6230
Joined: January 5, 2008



Congratulations Wishing! Can you tell us how your life has changed in those 90 days? You are doing awesome! proud of you . keep up the good work...

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Thank God for what you have. Trust God for what you need
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Posted: October 19, 2018, 5:39 PM


Posts: 67
Joined: July 25, 2018



Thanks everyone!

How my life has changed in the past 90 days?

Well... Let's see.. My overall demeanor has changed. I believe I've become pleasurable to be around ( So I'm told ). It feels good not having those horrible pains for alcohol. I use to get sharp pains in my heart and panic attacks have been at a minimum as before they'd occur multiple times a day where i felt like i was going to die. I don't wake up in the middle of the night gasping for air and running for a drink to calm me down quick. I have my day's and nights straight ( for the most part ) and not up all night drinking large amounts of alcohol being loud and obnoxious to only wake up and do it all over again. I feel as if my body has been hydrated as before it was depleted of water. 90 days thought.. 92 to be exact... I have to say i feel pretty good and proud of myself. I know every day can be nerve racking but i think about how better off i am now versus how i used to feel before those 90 days.

I'd like to thank all of you for checking in on me and being there for me.
It actually plays a major role in my sobriety knowing I have this right here and you guy's who have my back. I don't want to let myself down, my family, my health , or any of you guy's down. I want to continue feeling decent versus feeling like death ( Literally ) .

I hope you all have a wonderful day and night!

Love,
Wishing ;)
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Posted: October 21, 2018, 7:27 PM


Posts: 6230
Joined: January 5, 2008



Awesome stuff Wishing. This board was a God send and a life saver to me when I first went in recovery. I know and can understand how you feel when you come here and find support. There are many who were here back then who played a big part in my recovery. It is not as active now as it was back then with the coming of Facebook and other sites it has dwindled down to a slow pace but I still come here and I always will for as long as it is up and running. It is like a nesting place for me, ...the place where I learned to fly..For those who show up here I like to bring HOPE to those who are looking and to give back some of what was given to me. My advice, never compare yourself to another because you will either be looking up or looking down and you need to focus straight ahead. Find what works for you and work it and never give up on yourself and the life that was given to you for you are worth it.There is life after addiction and I think you are beginning to find that out for yourself. :) hooray from your cyber cheerleader lol

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Thank God for what you have. Trust God for what you need
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Karraster
Posted: October 23, 2018, 1:52 AM







So happy for you Wishing! Wow, reading this thread has been very uplifting and I relate to it. There is soooooo much to be grateful for each and every day... not being in a cloud of confusion, not waking up with dread or guilt for what transpired the day before, and being the kind of person a body can count on....the list keeps growing.

I loose track, but I think it's been around 5 years or so for me. I'm not much for dates or records, but I do remember very well coming here and the support I got from these lovely peeps. Pirate especially, and I'll always be so grateful. She made crystal clear to me that I can not ever take sobriety for granted, and I'm just one drink away from being right back where I was, so I don't dabble with it not a sip. My story may not be typical, I got down on my knees and asked the LORD to take away my desire, and BAM just like that, He did. It was still scary tho, being so unsure about what kind of life I could have without drink, almost like my life was over no more fun. Wondering if I would ever stop thinking about it all, all my waking moments. Plus the fact I had sunk so low, lots of relationships to rebuild, and I came close to loosing my a** on a business endeavor, had to turn that around, almost lost my husband...it was bad.

I did AA meetings for a while. I think the key is being honest with yourself, if you need face to face meetings you better go. Or like me I just talked to people I knew. Keep check of your thoughts. One morning, about a week or two in I awoke one morning and a voice inside my head said "are you really an alcoholic?" To this day I think that was the devil.

Oh and the smoking...I quit about a year and a half ago, wanna share about that. I came across a person named Joel, his motto NTAP. Never take another puff. So simple it sounds crazy, but the more I thought about it, the more sense it made. I've quit about 4 times in my life, all lasted about a year but I always made the mistake of taking just one puff. duh, that's all it took, and why I know not to take a sip either. I can honestly say I am so glad I do not drink or smoke I am free.

Remember, just keep coming back.




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Posted: October 27, 2018, 4:33 PM


Posts: 67
Joined: July 25, 2018



Thank you so much everyone for writing back to me :)


100 DAY'S TODAY!!!!

Love,

Wishing
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Posted: October 29, 2018, 12:00 PM


Posts: 6230
Joined: January 5, 2008



AWESOME! 100 DAYS IS GREAT! Keep on keeping on and spreading the hope and inspiration that will help encourage others . This week if you feel up to it take on a little project of some kind that you can do to help someone in need. It may be something as simple as helping someone take groceries to their car, visiting a shut in, bake a cake for someone or clean out a closet to give clothing to someone who needs it or food to a food bank. Take a look around and see who can use your help, kindness and smile... Hope you will have an awesome day and a wonderful sober week ahead....:)

This post has been edited by pirate on October 29, 2018, 12:00 PM

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Thank God for what you have. Trust God for what you need
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Posted: November 1, 2018, 4:12 AM


Posts: 67
Joined: July 25, 2018



Hi Everyone,

Its 3 am right now can't really fall back asleep. I'm a bit emotional right now thinking back how far I've came ( 105 days ) . Last night ( Halloween ) I was out with my mother for some dinner and there was a bar there and I just seen everyone sitting back enjoying drinks and pouring the beer on ice in a glass stein. I honestly missed it for a second as I zoned out at them and looking at every single one of them thinking myself they are having fun on Halloween. I would always drink on Halloween and have fun. Them the bartender asked me yes sir can i help you? I said WATER please. I don't know why it triggered me like that as I know I don't want it to be apart of my life. I guess this is just some of the hurdles in the obstacle course of sobriety.

I guess I'm just a bit lonely and depressed and alcohol would put a bandage on that feeling. But now that I think about it this original post 6 days 6 am I was much more depressed, emotional, sick, lonely, on the verge of death. I thank God for the strength he's given me to overcome the temptation and I thank him for the reminder of me being those people at the bar ( Not judging ) that would be at the bar stool drinking in excess and coming home stopping at the liquor store to buy hard liquor and more beers just to keep the party going. Then waking up in the morning hurting and doing it all again.

Thank you all for listening and I apologize if I don't respond to your posts as I do read them.

Lots of love,
Wishing
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Posted: November 1, 2018, 9:12 AM


Posts: 6230
Joined: January 5, 2008



Hi Wishing ..What you experienced is very normal for a recovering alcoholic. I have 8 plus years and there are still times when the thought of drinking will pop in my head and sometimes it is triggered by seeing others drinking and having a good time. Sometimes it happens if there is a situation that is stressful or worrisome. BUT just because a thought pops in our head does not mean that we have to act on it. These are the times when we have to work our recovery a little more forceful . I am an alcoholic and I will always be an alcoholic , recovery doesn't change that fact as there is no cure for my disease . It can however be put in remission by working a strong recovery program combined with support and a willingness to share thoughts and urges as you just did. You will be fine, just don't dwell on the drinking thoughts and do your readings, work your program and always get outside of self by doing something to help another who can use your help. Another wee bit of unasked advice...NEVER forget your last drunk and where it took you.. You have yourself an awesome day! and be proud of your accomplishments!

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Thank God for what you have. Trust God for what you need
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