< prev  post replypost new topic
Let Me Fall All By Myself ...


Posts: 1
Joined: January 26, 2017


Posted: January 26, 2017, 12:54 PM
Thank you! This helped me to see this in a different light.

I discovered this site by looking for some advice as I am very new to parenting a child with drug addiction. After reading - I know I am an enabler. Between this letter and some other post on this site, and reading todays message in Jesus is Calling. I realize that our hope is not in problem solving but to looking at the promise of an eternity of a problem free life in heaven. We can not seek perfection in this fallen world, God does not promise us a problem free life. He says, "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

It is possible to enjoy God and glorify Him in the midst of adverse circumstances. In fact, His light shines most brightly through believers who trust Him in the darkest of times.
This is by far the darkest time in my life, assumably the darkest time in my daughters. Letting go and letting God - HARD - but necessary.


Posts: 2616
Joined: January 4, 2008


Posted: February 6, 2017, 4:04 AM
Bump


Posts: 529
Joined: October 15, 2016


Posted: February 21, 2017, 10:05 AM
bump


Posts: 3
Joined: February 24, 2017


Posted: February 26, 2017, 12:51 AM
"Let me fall by myself"...what a powerful post..... I found this yesterday on this wonderful website.... I read it many times and cried.... what a powerful message... to the author, thank you so much for finally giving us insight to how addicts really feel and need....

I went to the VA Hospital today to pick up my 37 year old son from a 4 day detox (he has been in and out of rehab / detox for the past 20 years)...he checked himself out and said he was ready to really change...I told him after supporting him financially, paying all of his bills, catching him up and trying to help I had read "Let me fall by myself" and realized I had been enabling him and because I love him, I am not going to do it anymore.... He told me he knew I had been enabling him and yes, he needed to fall by himself, I was shocked... He has never asked me for anything, he never had to... I always gave him everything every time because I thought I was doing everything in my power to help him, little did I know I only made him worse and cost him valuable time to really "hit the bottom".... I am so relieved that we both understand what "enabling" means....

He is a father of two and a very smart man... he has all of the potential and ability to do anything he wants with his life... I pray that this is the time that he is going to follow through with the most important thing he can do in his life by letting go and let God.....I give him to God and have moved out of the way.....

I have read the many different situations and can feel your broken hearts and helplessness, I am one of you....we have to remember, "we didn't cause it", "we can't control it" and "we can't fix it"... our only hope is "just let go and let God"!


Posts: 640
Joined: April 4, 2016


Posted: March 17, 2017, 8:26 AM
Bump

--------------------

I forgot to read the fine print, when i signed up to be your Mom. I thought it would be smiles & hugs and quite a lot of fun.

I didn’t see the part about addiction, mental illness, pain, hopelessness or despair. I didn’t know life could be so flipping unfair.

But I now see something in the fine print that I didn’t see before. It also says to survive your addiction, I must love me more.


In Loving Memory of my angel, J. #forever21 #ihateaddiction #foreverloved


Posts: 1
Joined: March 21, 2017


Posted: March 21, 2017, 8:59 AM
Wow....absolutely beautiful writing. Wow....WOW Im kinda speechless.....or post-less if you will. Its about me. I mean.....im certain all of us addicts feel this way to a degree at some point or another but its how Ive felt since it became clear to me that I was an addict. I love it..LOVE IT> Keep writing. Thanks YOU


Posts: 1764
Joined: June 27, 2016


Posted: March 21, 2017, 7:48 PM
You dont know how strong you are, until Strong is all you've got. peace. bless you.


Posts: 1764
Joined: June 27, 2016


Posted: May 4, 2017, 6:54 PM
bump


Posts: 640
Joined: April 4, 2016


Posted: July 7, 2017, 11:17 PM
Bump

--------------------

I forgot to read the fine print, when i signed up to be your Mom. I thought it would be smiles & hugs and quite a lot of fun.

I didn’t see the part about addiction, mental illness, pain, hopelessness or despair. I didn’t know life could be so flipping unfair.

But I now see something in the fine print that I didn’t see before. It also says to survive your addiction, I must love me more.


In Loving Memory of my angel, J. #forever21 #ihateaddiction #foreverloved


Posts: 3
Joined: August 5, 2017


Posted: August 5, 2017, 3:00 AM
Well said! I am trying my best to do just that for my 23 yo. AD. *Deep breathe*

--------------------
With kindest wishes,

Joy in Eugene, OR


Posts: 640
Joined: April 4, 2016


Posted: December 21, 2017, 6:56 AM
Excellent words

--------------------

I forgot to read the fine print, when i signed up to be your Mom. I thought it would be smiles & hugs and quite a lot of fun.

I didn’t see the part about addiction, mental illness, pain, hopelessness or despair. I didn’t know life could be so flipping unfair.

But I now see something in the fine print that I didn’t see before. It also says to survive your addiction, I must love me more.


In Loving Memory of my angel, J. #forever21 #ihateaddiction #foreverloved


Posts: 640
Joined: April 4, 2016


Posted: March 14, 2018, 8:23 PM
BUMP

--------------------

I forgot to read the fine print, when i signed up to be your Mom. I thought it would be smiles & hugs and quite a lot of fun.

I didn’t see the part about addiction, mental illness, pain, hopelessness or despair. I didn’t know life could be so flipping unfair.

But I now see something in the fine print that I didn’t see before. It also says to survive your addiction, I must love me more.


In Loving Memory of my angel, J. #forever21 #ihateaddiction #foreverloved


Posts: 1
Joined: April 26, 2018


Posted: April 26, 2018, 8:46 PM
I just read this post and am about to end my enabling behaviour towards my adult son. Tomorrow he will be leaving our home and most likely be out on the streets. Your post just reconfirmed that this is the right thing to do. Thank you for sharing


Posts: 5
Joined: March 16, 2020


Posted: March 16, 2020, 10:30 PM
With that in my heart i will read before my next attempt too end it again ,everyone who carries the weight of addiction. One-day someday anyday . Pull me out of this pit its so deep ???


Posts: 52
Joined: May 13, 2007


Posted: August 22, 2020, 2:56 AM
Bump


Posts: 52
Joined: May 13, 2007


Posted: October 16, 2022, 10:03 PM
I remember reading this for the first time when my son was 19 and a heroin addict. He has recovered, relapsed, recovered and relapsed again. He is 36 and relapsed again. He stopped IV heroin and is snorting his suboxone, smoking pot nonstop and using iv cocaine now. His wife and 2 baby boys left him last week. Tomorrow, I go evict him from my town home. They lived there over 3 years and never paid rent. Couldn't evict my grandbabies, but his wife finally got tired. And, I guess his a** got cushioned.
post replypost new topic