Let Me Fall All By Myself ...
Posted: June 17, 2015, 10:48 AM

Posts: 1059
Joined: August 11, 2012

Posted: July 24, 2015, 4:35 PM

Posts: 1
Joined: July 24, 2015

My daughter is 26. She has been addicted to cocaine and adderall. She has gone to rehab but never completed a total course. She has a masters degree and she is bipolar and has disordered eating. Currently she is living with my husband and I. She has been clean for several months. She quit her job (too stressful and not a good fit) yesterday. She used last night and is now back home. We have said that she can't live in our home and use. I'm terrified to throw her out. She is on many medications for bipolar disorder and they are working. If she doesn't take her medications appropriately she will spin out of control. It is not so easy to say let her find her bottom because in her case most likely her bottom will be fatal. We are so tired of all of it but also terrified to throw her out. I don't think I could live with her death.
Posted: July 29, 2015, 6:02 PM

Posts: 51
Joined: February 14, 2015

thank you for the encouragement that there is hope if the addict wants it.

this is so true this is what my son has said to me many times, ( I take drugs to function, both mentally and physically) I've tried to tell him there is a better way but you have to asked for it. They he denies he is using or he will joke around or right mom I smoke crack today.

This is my second day of walking away from my son. I had to. He is in a really bad place. He used a bad needle and he has already had 5 surgeries they weren't sure they were going to save his arm.

He keeps going back to the hospital saying he is so much pain to get pain meds or morphine.
Eventually the hospital will stop believing his 'pain' threshold and give him aspirin. That's when I fear that he will do something stupid to get drugs. My biggest fear is that he will hurt someone or kill someone else child to get drugs. Or hurt an elderly person.
I pray to god, my mother or any other angel in heaven to help him see the light and get help
thank you for sharing your story it helps me keep my distant from my son
Posted: August 17, 2015, 2:11 PM

Posts: 7
Joined: August 17, 2015

Thank u so much for the wisdom that have been spoken I finally got a view of what an addict faces and how he feels when it comes to his mother enabling him. I have searched the Internet for some type of wisdom thank god I found it. Now I'll know how I can help my son I realize that my love is actually killing him I get it now. Thanks again you might have saved my sons life And mine
Posted: October 25, 2015, 3:43 PM

Posts: 1
Joined: October 25, 2015

OMG!! I was really struggling with even telling my son that he had to leave if he does not agree to go into a drug recovery program, until I read this poem. Awesome!!! I will read it ad often ad I need it or when I get the notion to tell my son that he can continue to live at our home knowing he need help with his addiction.
Posted: November 12, 2015, 1:00 PM

Posts: 6
Joined: November 12, 2015

I dont know what brought me to this today. Utter heartbrokenness for my son I'm sure!ME reaching for SOMETHING to hold on too. BUT i truely feel this was intended for me to read and let it soak in, I pray that this is right! I pray that its correct wisdom for us out here dealing with loved ones with addiction.
Posted: December 27, 2015, 5:47 AM

Posts: 1
Joined: December 27, 2015

.... and what if he dies
Posted: December 27, 2015, 4:38 PM

Posts: 150
Joined: July 31, 2015

elliemae, an addict faces death every time he puts that needle in his arm, or pops that pill in his mouth and it doesn't matter whether he's living in cushy surroundings or under a bridge. It's a chance they willingly take every time they use.

This post has been edited by themom on December 27, 2015, 4:39 PM
Posted: December 29, 2015, 7:56 PM

Posts: 22
Joined: November 26, 2015

Thank you so much for posting this. I have read and re read this many times and it answers many questions. Gives me hope and gave me permission to let go without feeling so much guilt. My our prayers be answered and our children, partners and loved ones be returned to us if not in the here in now but later when all will be at peace.
Posted: April 22, 2016, 12:02 PM

Posts: 3
Joined: April 22, 2016

That's where I am at. I am having the hardest time letting him fall. He calls and I come running. I take him to detox, he signs himself out in 3 days. Says he's good. Then he takes from us again. He takes cash, electronic items, tools, etc. He's done this many times. AND I STILL HELP HIM! Why? My family is so upset with me. I always think something really bad is going to happen to him. Find him dead somewhere. I know I need to let go. I need the strength. How does a mother let her child fall.
Posted: April 22, 2016, 4:05 PM

Posts: 96
Joined: November 13, 2015

thank you for posting that.
Posted: May 1, 2016, 2:06 PM

Posts: 37
Joined: May 1, 2016

I'm showing your post to my husband, passion. He needs to read it. Thanks so much!
Posted: September 10, 2016, 12:34 PM

Posts: 2616
Joined: January 4, 2008

Posted: September 10, 2016, 12:42 PM

Posts: 1906
Joined: October 23, 2011

And after you hit bottom http://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-10..._howitworks.pdf

It's there in most every village, town and city. It works ! It's FREE !

I wish everyone the best.

Bob R

Serenity Prayer
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.

Free copy of AA's Big Book on-line: http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/alcoh...olics-anonymous

Free copy of NA's Big Book on-line:
Copy & Paste coastalcarolinaarea.org/literature/books/b_t.pdf

Copy & paste www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-10_howitworks.pdf



--- driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity.

---there are those too who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest.

... I need AA more than it needs me.

--- I fight recovery tooth and nail....
I'm not used to being sane, it just doesn't seem natural.

...... According to the great spiritual teachers, ignorance does not result from what we don’t know; ignorance results from what we think we do know.

---Some think that 2+2=5 and believe it.
Some know that 2+2=4 and can't stand it.

--- I didn't have a very happy childhood
but I sure am having a long one !

---Dry since 1989
working daily on getting/staying SOBER.

---If you want to drink, that's your business
...If you want to quit, that's AA's business.

... Tell me, I'll forget;
... Show me, I'll remember;
... Engage me, I'll understand.

---Most problems are psychological.
Most solutions are spiritual .

"If we try to change our ego with the help of our ego, we only have a better-disguised ego."
--Richard Rohr

WWBWD (What Would Bill W. Do)
Posted: November 20, 2016, 4:40 AM

Posts: 2
Joined: November 20, 2016

wonderfully written
Posted: December 11, 2016, 2:38 AM

Posts: 1
Joined: December 11, 2016

It's not the same for everyone. What about those you let have their rock bottom and that was it? I'd rather a million years of enabling than this devastating loss.
Posted: December 11, 2016, 12:40 PM

Posts: 2616
Joined: January 4, 2008

How do you know anyone's rock bottom? Your perception of what rock bottom is...may not be someone else's....??
Posted: December 11, 2016, 8:28 PM

Posts: 521
Joined: August 28, 2016

Con--absolutely! My son should have hit what I perceived as rock bottom 20 yrs. ago, but his is at a totally different level!

He isn't me and I am not him! We battle different beasts!



Posted: January 1, 2017, 6:55 PM

Posts: 5
Joined: December 26, 2016

FANTASTIC. Your words completely blow me away. They say everything I wanted to convey the people I have long since drank away. But my head was far too befuddled and jumbled
17 yrs sober now, and you just cannot turn the clock back. Yet if I could, I would plagiarise every word. THANK YOU.
Posted: January 22, 2017, 4:22 AM

Posts: 5
Joined: January 16, 2017

thank you for posting - you have no idea what it means to me to read this - I am going out of my mind right now - I want to scream - help - someone please help - and then I saw your words - and they comforted me. I never ever believed it would happen to one of my children - and even now he's an adult but he is my baby - and it's so hard to know what to do. Thank you.
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