Exhausted Husband
Spent
Posted: July 24, 2020, 2:27 PM







First time posting and not even sure where or how to begin. My wife developed a drinking problem 7 years ago now. It has had highs and lows, moments of sobriety, but mostly times of being withdrawn into her own world of self medicating with alcohol.
I am at a point where after more conversations that I can remember, I am absolutely spent. I am exhausted.
With two children in the house I have always maintained a vigilance in trying to shield them hoping they wouldn't be exposed and learn of her condition. Both are in their teen years and fully aware of her condition.
I am out of energy and mostly out of any hope this will ever change. Alone for many years now, I am empty with the exception of my kids who I continue to worry over that this will in some way effect them long term.
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Posted: July 24, 2020, 8:31 PM


Posts: 6284
Joined: January 5, 2008



Hi . If you go to stepchat.com there are people there in al anon who will give you support . There are also al anon meetings there. You cannot make your wife give up the drink as much as you would like to because that has to be her decision . You can however protect yourself by seeking support for you and your family. I wish you all the best . Hope you will come back here and let us know how you are doing...

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Thank God for what you have. Trust God for what you need
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Posted: July 27, 2020, 8:48 AM


Posts: 19856
Joined: October 17, 2003



Spent,

We are moving your post to the Families/Partners of Addicts board, where there are others who can relate to what you are going through.

- The Moderators
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Posted: July 29, 2020, 8:51 PM


Posts: 173
Joined: November 10, 2019



Spent welcome and it is good you are reaching out for support. Yes, sadly, your wife's addiction is affecting your children and you. Addiction is like a parasite, it destroys its host (your wife) then creeps out and starts to destroy the family. The best thing you can do is be totally honest with yourself and your children. It will likely reassure them what they are witnessing and thinking is indeed true.

Does your wife acknowledge her alcohol addiction? Does she want to get help? If not, you can expect more of the same for you and your children. It important to get help for you and your children. Its important to learn what you will and won't tolerate in your life and your children's life. I hope your wife will choose detox, treatment, and recovery. Otherwise, she may lose you and your children. I wish you all the best.

This post has been edited by Sallyana on July 29, 2020, 11:35 PM
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