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Posted: April 27, 2020, 9:29 PM
Hi, My son is having a psychotic break because of meth. And I dont know where to go to get help. My husband and I are retired living off our savings, and my son has no insurance. He is not violent, but is completely delusional. He has been taking his room apart and every computer device he has taken apart because he believes he is being watched and listen to. He pulled up his carpet because something was moving under it, took his guitars apart because hethought they were bugged, etc. Does anyone know where I should start to try to get help?
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Posts: 341
Joined: December 23, 2018
Posted: April 27, 2020, 10:31 PM
How old is your son? Maybe start with your local county medical center or behavioral health. Sounds like he is a danger to himself & definitely to you & your husband. You may have to call 911 & tell them he is a meth addict & is in a drug induced psychosis, damaging your house & property. They will take him in for 72 hour observation (at least that is what would happen in CA where I used to live) He should be able to get behavioral health & drug addiction help thru the affordable healthcare act.
Hallucinations & psychosis are side effects of meth addiction. Maybe call a local Narcotics Ann. chapter & seek help & guidance from them. You have every right to be afraid, your son's hallucinations are VERY real to him, paranoia, uncontrolled behavior. He needs help now. BUT, that said you will have to set some very hard, firm rules for your home. You can lead a horse to water, but that doesn't mean he can or will choose to get sober. He can move into a rehab or be hospitalized but he can choose to leave too. You must set your bottom line - he must complete treatment before he can move back in. Good luck, it is a horrible road your son is taking you down. He is not able to make decisions right now. I wish you the best. Please don't be afraid to come back on this chat & let us know how things are going or not going. We will always be here to listen, offer unemotional advice & try to give you moral support. We are all walking in your shoes, some of us are just starting & some of us have been on this road for years. All of our addicted kids are works in progress & it doesn't end. They will always be an addict, but there are successes & major milestones. | ||
Posts: 384
Joined: October 25, 2016
Posted: April 28, 2020, 12:03 PM
I have gone through this with my son. It is very scary. I see the time you posted was last night so I think so you have probably done something already. There are several options. You can drive him to any hospital or a psych emergency room if he will cooperate. I wouldn’t do this again myself it is too dangerous having them in the car while you are driving. You can call the police or sheriff’s office and ask for their mental health department. They have officers trained to deal with this kind of thing. You can call 911 and tell them what’s happening. Explain to the officers because you don’t want them to misunderstand the situation. They may still have to subdue him and an ambulance sedate him. It’s not fun to watch but sometimes necessary. Sometimes they run. Take his car keys. They will drive crazy until all the tires are flat or they wreck the car. Either police or neighborhood hospital will probably commit him to a psychiatric hospital because he is a danger to himself and others. Suggest strongly that they do this. They will keep him probably minimum of 3 days. That is the best place for him. Don’t sign to be responsible for the hospital bill if he is an adult. Have emergency numbers ready for the next time. Local MHMR has an emergency number. Find out your local options. You can’t talk him down at home. He will not listen to reason. Once this happens, their brains get a short circuit somehow and it is more likely to happen over and over if he keeps using.
This post has been edited by BugginMe on April 28, 2020, 12:30 PM -------------------- BUGS | ||
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Posted: April 28, 2020, 1:06 PM
Thanks for the replies, it makes me feel less alone. I haven't done anything yet, I'm kinda frozen. He is soo paranoid and he trusts me, so I dont want to break his trust. My sister went thru this with her son, but he was violent, so the police finally took him away. So far my son is not a harm to us, he is just scared. The police wouldn't do anything for my sister until she could prove her son was violent. My son is 30. I wrote the post want out. Been going thru this for 10 years, but it use to be heroin, now its meth. It was easier to kick him out when it was heroin because he wasnt out of his mind. We are still shelter in place here so I dont want to send him out. I have reached out to a friend who works with charities for drug addicts and the homeless. Hopefully she mite tell me who can help. He will not go anywhere willingly, because of course there is nothing wrong with him in his mind. Thanks for the support I just needed some ideas and people who have been thru this.
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Posts: 1764
Joined: June 27, 2016
Posted: April 28, 2020, 10:07 PM
https://www.addictioncampuses.com/me...meth/psychosis/
All calls free and confidential. (888) 816-8415 Meth-induced psychosis occurs during both intoxication and withdrawal and may cause delusions, hallucinations, paranoia, and violent behavior. Meth Psychosis Treatment Individuals experiencing meth psychosis in need of treatment for addiction may need specialized behavioral healthcare services prior to enrolling in a rehab program. Antipsychotics, medications for anxiety, and medications for insomnia may be used as part of treatment for psychosis. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) has been shown to be beneficial for both meth psychosis and dependence. Once a person has stabilized, treatment can focus on addiction. Individuals with a co-occurring mental health disorder, or a mental illness that occurs with addiction, such as schizophrenia, may be better served in an inpatient or residential treatment program. A dual diagnosis treatment program integrates care for both the mental health and substance use disorders, so that a person has the greatest chance for a stable and long-lasting recovery. Contact Addiction Campuses now for more info on meth abuse, addiction, and treatment options. | ||
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Posts: 1764
Joined: June 27, 2016
Posted: April 28, 2020, 10:22 PM
So Sorry to hear what you are going thru. It is a very lonely and frightening situation.
I went thru this very briefly with my son. it was a few years ago and he was not a violent person. I brought him to my therapist at a recovery center, where I thought they would talk him into going to the hospital, but they didn't. It was a very surreal experience. I had not experienced that before, was by myself with him. he was just a little out of it and did not know that he was saying things that were a little off. I did not bring him to the hospital. It was hard to explain. one of the healthcare workers he spoke to concluded that it was 'complicated' and sent us on our way.... very strange. I think no one wanted to tell us to go to the hospital. maybe he was not bad enough to admit him. he was not a behavioral problem. the episode when away by the next day. There was one other time a few years ago he was living in florida. He told me a story that he went to the beach to meet people but they were not there. he was alone, and then he saw that the SWAT team was all around him..... luckily he called a friend who talked him thru it … as he was running to his apartment, he thought the SWAT team was in all the cars, and moving in on him. He still says it was true. Luckily these were the only two experiences. my son was not a meth addict and both of those times he said he was trying to quit pills and heroin. so idk what did it. | ||
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Posts: 1764
Joined: June 27, 2016
Posted: April 28, 2020, 10:49 PM
I think the best advice would be for you to get your son to a hospital any way you can.
I think they can give anti-psycotic medication. It is best for him to be in a hospital situation. for himself and for you. It is possible he could stay for a week and if the hospital has a detox and rehab, maybe he can be convinced to stay there. At that point, you can declare that he can not live at home, it is too stressful. The hospital may be able to find a rehab/recovery center or half way house for him to go to. He needs to understand that he is 30 yrs old and should be independent and talking care of himself. My son turned 30 last year. Had been at a rehab for a few weeks or months each year for the past 4-5 years. Clean for a few months, active addiction for about a year, then recovery, repeat. He has now been clean for close to a year. although it was harder to get him to go to the hospital last year. he only stayed for about 3 weeks. It was different, not a good experience like the previous year. then he was in jail for a few months, then a rehab center, then a shelter, now a homeless hotel waiting for more help from social services. he is working. and goes to a recovery center where I think he got help navigating social services and the shelter system. he is living a few hours away from us, in a city, no car. He finally uses public transportation. I hope your son can get to that point too. I can honestly say over the course of a year of being sober (or close to sober - he might be going to a dr for medication - or maybe not - idk), my son improves just a little each month. I wouldn't even count the first 6 months. He has made the most progress in the last 3 months. The months before January were still kind of dark. it takes a long time to make progress once they begin to want to be clean/sober. It took us (mom and dad) the whole past year to mentally and physically get back to normal. I hope things go well for you. Keep us updated. This post has been edited by NyToFlorida on April 28, 2020, 10:54 PM | ||
Posts: 209
Joined: November 10, 2019
Posted: April 29, 2020, 9:09 PM
Great posts and information for you longevity. As far as finances go, the emergency room has to admit you even if you don't have insurance...so, that may be the route to get him in the hospital however I understand he's likely not go and he thinks he's fine. Its very difficult when someone is psychotic because they are unpredictable and he has delusions and paranoia. Just be careful because you may become part of his delusion or paranoia and possibly could become dangerous. If that happens, protect yourself and call 911 and make sure you mention mental health so they send the right people who understand and have been trained in mental health issues. So sorry for your situation and your son, very heartbreaking.
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Posts: 341
Joined: December 23, 2018
Posted: April 29, 2020, 9:39 PM
Longevity, don't hesitate to come on here & vent. All 4 of us who have commented so far are parents of adult addicts. Meth is HORRIBLE! You can't "fix" him or cure him. He really does need medical & psychiatric help as soon as possible. Good luck Momma & come back & just talk. If does help.
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Posts: 1764
Joined: June 27, 2016
Posted: May 1, 2020, 12:31 PM
Hello longevity - one more thing I was thinking about....
You are in a tough situation because your son trusts you and you don't want to betray his trust. But he also trusts you to make the right decisions for him when he is not able to. When he comes out of this, will he want to know that you let him wander around in a psycotic state or that you tried to get him professional help. I also do understand that professional help can back fire - so you might be unsure of starting something that might go awry. He may be very angry initially, but later on in life, when he is thinking clearly, he will understand that you did the right thing, and it is he who is doing the wrong things that are making you make the difficult decisions you need to make. If he is not under professional medical care at this time, please consider calling a friend or relative he trusts to convince him to go to the hospital. Set up the paper work before he gets there. Maybe there is someone on staff you can arrange for your son to talk to. and then admit him. It is true about insurance. They will set him up with Medicaid ins when they admit him. (this is how I felt when my son was going thru the mild psycotic episode it only lasted about 24 hours. If it had lasted any longer, or had been alarming, I would have brought him to the hospital. In my case it was the first time and he had not been to the hospital before. I was new at this type of parenting. It turned out, I was able to convince him to go to the hospital rehab a few weeks after this. My son was angry a year ago, when we kicked him out, and when he was in jail and we would not let him come home to our house. He hung up on us, and said a few minor sarcastic things. Time has gone by, he found shelter one way or another, found a recovery center, works part time there. over the past year, when I have said something like "I'm sorry we had to do this, or sorry everything happened this way, he has said, "you don't need to be sorry, It's not your fault") This post has been edited by NyToFlorida on May 1, 2020, 12:33 PM | ||
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Posted: May 2, 2020, 1:33 PM
Thanks everyone for your support. I'm still going thru this, he is smart enough to pretend with other people he is ok. He only comes undone with us. I'm placing calls and checking on resources. What is killing me is my husband and I wanted to put the house up for sale and move out of state to be with our daughter. But I'm exhausted, he keeps tearing up the house and I feel I need to once again put my life on hold for him. He is in no state to take care of himself, and I resent him for it. Then I feel guilty. I'm so conflicted, angry and sad. I feel trapped. Am I a bad mother if I leave him alone and go to another state, he will be homeless and unstable, what kind of mother does that? But I want a life, we are in our sixties. I'm so tired.
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Posts: 209
Joined: November 10, 2019
Posted: May 2, 2020, 5:31 PM
Longevity I personally think you have to do what is best for you. He's had 10 years to be responsible and take the help which was offered. He's 30 years old, a grown adult. Its not your responsibility to compensate for his bad choices. It would be totally different if he was 15 but he's 30. Even being there for him is not helping him. Its very hard however I would 'cut the cord' and start living my life again. At this point he's a bottomless pit. If he does drugs, gets addicted its his responsibility and desire to get sober not yours. My daughter is currently homeless with dozens of offers for help and she doesn't reach out and take it. Why I'll never understand. Of course, as her mother it's heartbreaking. However, it's her life not mine and she's choosing not to take the help. I love her and care about her however I won't allow her addiction to take my life too.
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Posts: 341
Joined: December 23, 2018
Posted: May 2, 2020, 10:51 PM
Longevity, my hubby & I are also in our 60's. I would like to suggest that you contact Narcotics Anonymous or a therapist so you can talk to a professional so you can come up with a plan for yourself & your son. You should be able to move to a place where you can be happy. You & your husband need to care for yourself first because your son will continue use, continue to go into the meth fueled psychosis, taking your money, joy & life until you have nothing left.
Please talk to a professional & someone who specializes in addiction & the problems that go with it. I wish for the best for you & your family | ||
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Posted: May 3, 2020, 9:28 PM
Thanks for the support it really has been helpful. I need to hear it's ok for my husband and I to go ahead with our lives. Sometimes I feel so helpless. It lifts my spirits to hear that it is ok for me to seek happiness even if it means leaving son to fend for himself. I keep going between staying here to take care of him forever or seeking my bliss. I was having a really dark day the last day I posted thinking my life was over and I was stuck taking care of him till I die. (I know over dramatic), but that is how I was feeling. The replies are helping me move forward and for the moment I'm feeling more positives, thanks again. My son seems to be pulling out of the psychosis, but as stated this could just keep going on and on. He has gotten clean so many times over the last 10 years just to relapse that I think it's time for me to move on, even though its painful. Again thanks for making me feel like I'm not a monster for trying to move on.
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Posts: 341
Joined: December 23, 2018
Posted: May 4, 2020, 10:48 AM
Longevity, we have all been in those dark hours, days, weeks... Sitting there wondering how this all happened, when will it end? What will he do when the money runs out? What will you do. Sometimes they will get better when forced to make a decision & sometimes they just go deeper & deeper with all the help we offer.
Do not feel guilty for someone else's actions, haven't you always been there for him? Offering love & support? When he's a little more stable, have a deep talk with him & ask him if he trusts you? Explain you cannot continue living like this & give him some deadlines & offer to love & support him, but not financially. Good luck sweetie | ||
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Posted: May 5, 2020, 8:28 PM
Longevity60,
I also have a son who is a meth addict. We are not sure how long he has been a user. The last few years have been awful. Like your son, he is paranoid And thinks he is being watched and recorded. I can give him all the logical reasons for the noises and voices. The worst part is how much he believes his own scary thoughts. There is no reasoning with him. I spend a year trying to help him, and finally came to the conclusion he has to want the help. I give him places he can go for help. I know in my heart of hearts I have done everything to get him on his feet. Truck for shelter which he destroyed looking for cameras and recording devices. Storage unit to keep his stuff in, he has been kicked out of 3 of them. Phone to help him find work. Think he has been through 6 of them. Finally gave up on the phones. He was destroying everything around the house. Doors from slamming, the gate to our back yard several times. He was living in our motor home and broke everything in it, and when we kicked him out of it, he almost set it on fire. He has been homeless for the past year and a half. We had to get a restraint order against him, because he was getting violent. He spend a few weeks in jail, but never made it as far as rehab. He doesn’t have a problem according to him. In the state we live in, you would think we could get him help. Even with all the police reports we have and restraining order. If he does not want the help, officials can not force him to get it. He is 43 years old. Like you, we are getting ready to retire at the end of the year. Our plan is to move out of state. I’ve told him we are moving and if he wants any financial help to move on with his life, he has to get help. I am ready to walk away and leave him to fend for himself. As a mom, it kills me, but I have to get my life back. I have lived in total fear for a long time. It wasn’t an easy journey to get to this point, but his life needs to be separate from mine for now. I can only hope he reaches out for help on his own. In my mind, that’s the only way he will get clean. I’m so sorry you are dealing with it. People here listen and don’t judge. Been awhile since I have posted. I do come in and read posts. Yours caught my attention. You’re not alone, just having the people here who can relate is a huge help. Good luck! | ||
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Posts: 341
Joined: December 23, 2018
Posted: May 6, 2020, 1:39 PM
great reply Momtomethhead. My 45 y/o son is a meth addict too. Past 2 years were the worst ever but he is stable now, but didn't go back to rehab & isn't attending meetings now. He's working but I still worry so much. Fortunately he does NOT live with us. I retired 8 years ago when my mother was dying. A couple of years after her death, we had a small window of opportunity to move to another state & we did and we have never regretted it.
My son still overshares stupid crap he is doing which scares the hell outta of us. Because we have exhausted any available funds we HAD helping him after he got this job. My husband is an AWFUL enabler & will not listen to my instincts & it cost us greatly. The constant stress worry & anxiety that our children put on us is seriously harmful to our physical & mental health. Both my husband & I are on High Blood meds now because of this mess & we both take anxiety meds.... So you MUST safe yourself because no one else will | ||
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