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Laugh At Ourselves


Posts: 384
Joined: October 25, 2016


Posted: February 25, 2020, 10:28 PM
Posts: 631
Joined: April 10, 2006

Chuckles posted a few years back ...

How many NarAnoners does it take to change a lightbulb?
Just one , but.................. It really, really has to WANT to be changed.

What do you call a codependent who says 'no' and doesn't feel guilty? HEALTHY.

You're codependent for sure when you get kicked off jury duty for insisting that you're the guilty one.

Did you hear about the codependent who flunked geography? He couldn't distinguish any boundaries.

You know you're codependent if you find yourself in a rut -- and move in furniture.

What does a codependent have in common with God? They both have a plan for your life.

Why does a codependent buy two copies of every self-help book? One to read and one to pass on to someone who really needs it.

Why did the codependent cross the road? To help the chicken make a decision.

You know you're a codie if... you feel guilty, for not feeling guilty!

THE WIFE OF A NOT-YET-RECOVERING ALCOHOLIC visited a fortuneteller. The mystic stared into her crystal ball and proclaimed, "I have some terrible news. In the near future, your husband will suffer a hideous, violent death."

The poor woman was visibly shaken. "W-w-will I be acquitted?" she asked.

This post has been edited by BugginMe on February 25, 2020, 10:37 PM

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BUGS


Posts: 384
Joined: October 25, 2016


Posted: February 25, 2020, 10:38 PM


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cynical one
Posted: December 15, 2005, 12:46 AM


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Joined: May 11, 2005



Three people, one of whom was a codependent, were in line to be executed at the guillotine. The first person stuck his head in the hole, the rope was cut, and the blade fell, only to stop an inch above the person's neck. The executioners saw it as a sign from God and so decided to let the person go. The next person put his head in the hole, the rope was cut, and again, the blade stopped an inch above the person's neck. That person, too, was released. As the codependent walked up for his turn at the guillotine, he turned to the executioner and said: "You know, I think I know how to fix that."


How do you know when you are in bed with an codependent? They wake up, roll over, and ask, "Am I OK?"


What is the last thing to happen to an codependent before they die? Someone else's life flashes before their eyes.


How many codependents does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one - she keeps flipping the light switch repeating "_This_ time it will come back on"


How can you tell you're at an Alanon meeting? Someone spills their coffee and everyone gets up to clean it up.


What's the difference between a codependent and a toilet seat? When you s*** on a toilet seat it doesn't get up and follow you around.


What did one co-dependent say to the other co-dependent after they got done having sex? It was good for you, was it good for me?


Do you know the difference between a terrorist and a codependent? You can negotiate with a terrorist.


How many Al-Anon members does it take to change a lightbulb ? None. They leave it alone and let it screw it's self.


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BUGS


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Posted: February 26, 2020, 1:56 PM
Thanks, Bugs! Love it! <3


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Joined: June 27, 2016


Posted: February 26, 2020, 9:10 PM
yes, thanks for the laughs!
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