When Things Are Good ...
Posted: November 5, 2019, 12:57 PM


Posts: 32
Joined: March 20, 2018



Do you find yourself waiting for the ball to drop?

My son has been good, and I mean really good, for the last 20 days. No substance use, happy, going to the gym, spending lots of time upstairs with us, seeing good friends that we all know. He's calm, we can converse - kind of like the son I know and love best. He's got a job and has had two pay checks, with $ left in his account too. His skin is looking so much better and he's a-ok with random testing too. Many a battle to test when he's using, so much of a battle that we didn't need a test to know the results. I am so proud of him now. He even has goals.

The only problem is that I find myself waiting for signs, any sign, that he's back using again. It's like I don't want to feel too happy because something always happens and we end up in that downwards spiral again.

Does your level of happiness stop before it hits 100% ?

Just needed to talk to someone who understands.
xo

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I read all the parenting books, we played together, they played with friends. I was there for them before and after school, they played hockey and soccer, we went on holidays. I thought I was doing it right.
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Posted: November 5, 2019, 1:22 PM


Posts: 192
Joined: July 6, 2018



I understand completely. My daughter is also doing well,but yesterday she sneezed a few times.
Where most people might think it's cold and flu season,I immediately think oh she must have been using opioids. This is what happens when she starts to go through withdrawal.
I am always looking for signs of use. That's my addiction.
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Posted: November 5, 2019, 2:25 PM


Posts: 478
Joined: November 9, 2018



My daughter has never been off drugs long enough for me to answer your question. I wish I could. If you don't mind sharing, how did he stop and what is his DOC? He sounds like he's doing really well
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Posted: November 5, 2019, 7:27 PM


Posts: 208
Joined: December 23, 2018



My son hasn't used since June, but every time the phone rings (or DOESN'T ring) I worry. He is working & is happy with his location & job. He was able to move 4 hours away from his druggie friends & the place where he'd get arrested all the time & wants to stay there. He's working on 2 different jobs to stay up there. He knows & we know that if he returns he will be in jail & using again really quick. He SAYS he's going to meetings, but I really don't know.
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Posted: November 5, 2019, 7:29 PM


Posts: 208
Joined: December 23, 2018



So yes, your feelings are normal - they've put us thru hell & we really have no reason to trust them yet because they have proven time & time & time & time again that their judgment sucks... :( I HOPE she keeps up the good work!!!
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Posted: November 5, 2019, 7:30 PM


Posts: 208
Joined: December 23, 2018



Oops, sorry MomFail - HE keeps up the good work!!! I still don't like your avatar name, you did the best you could!! :)
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Posted: November 6, 2019, 1:24 AM


Posts: 32
Joined: March 20, 2018



Sallyanna, my son is a coc user. A high functioning, not even rude or disrespectful, user. We were fooled for a long time.

I don't know what changed, other than he knew we were done and there would be no more money and no family vacation until he's at least 100 days clean. So far, he has done this on his own. I think he just woke up and said I can do this. So one day at a time because one hit will put us right back where we started.

My ears perk up every single time he blows his nose. My eyes check for open wounds, his major withdrawal symptom - he's a picker; my heart aches and my mind wonders when I will wake up.

But, tomorrow will be three weeks and I will take it.


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I read all the parenting books, we played together, they played with friends. I was there for them before and after school, they played hockey and soccer, we went on holidays. I thought I was doing it right.
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Posted: November 7, 2019, 4:47 PM


Posts: 208
Joined: December 23, 2018



YAY!! Mom Fail!! # weeks is good!!! Congratulations!
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Posted: November 9, 2019, 8:05 PM


Posts: 32
Joined: March 20, 2018



Mtnmom, THANK YOU xo
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