Effects Of Long Term Meth
WA Dad
Posted: April 13, 2018, 7:48 PM

Was hoping to hear from persons with recovery from meth.My daughter started using meth when she was 16 or so and she’s now 36. She was clean for about 5 years after her last treatment (5th treatment attempt) Relapsed and fell hard. The State has her daughter and since this is the 3rd time, likely won’t get her back. Things are bad. I hear she is selling herself for dope and living where she can. We have not spoken in a while since I won’t give her money. Both Meth sure makes the user mean. I never thought my own child could speak to me like that. It hurts but I understand it’s the drug talking. I go to support meetings for myself now. People say they notice their loved one may get clean from meth but stay “changed” Never really finish maturing. May stay mean. I’m reading the same warning in several sources. Seems bleak that I’ll ever see her recover and have a relationship with her. Any advice please?
Posted: April 14, 2018, 1:44 PM

Posts: 97
Joined: January 21, 2017

WA Dad... glad you reached out. I just learned from my son recently that he started using meth in high school, he is now 35. He has said and done some nasty things over the past two years, when things really went off the rails if you will. Homeless, jobless, desperation on every level. I remember clearly mourning the fact that I would never have time with my son, the one I knew before, ever again. He now has two jobs, and a small and very humble place over his head. And I do occassionally see those bright eyes and kind disposition. They can and do recover, but on their time as we know. You are so brave to cut off your daughter's money supply.....and also bear the pain of having your grandchild with the state. Keep going to your support meetings, and posting here. There are so many smart, kind, compassionate people. Our tribe. I am hoping Lolledee reaches out.....she is in recovery, and tells it like it is...but is living proof that things can turn around. Sending peace, Libby
Posted: April 14, 2018, 1:46 PM

Posts: 384
Joined: October 25, 2016

I wish I could tell you everything will be ok but I think only God knows whether your daughter will ever be the same again. My son is a Meth user and about the same age. Luckily he has no children. He does get mean and crazy. I am sure he has some irreversible brain damage and a mental illness (caused by drug use?). He has been clean for intervals in his life but always relapses so I can’t tell you how he is after recovery because he may never be completely sober. He has virtually nothing ... he has lost it all. I am not sure where he is living right now and I know it is so hard for parents to cope with everything. You have to find away to let it go. There isn’t much parents can do when their child is determined to self destruct. I fought against it for years. It is not easy to detach and it is a daily struggle for me. Some days are easier than others and a group or counseling should help you.

I can say I worked with a woman that stopped using Meth some years ago. She didn’t use as long as our children but she made a full recovery and seemed perfectly normal. She did have a good relationship with her parents. I have seen glimpses of the way my son used to be but it gets harder to see as time goes on. Maybe it is because of permanent changes in him caused by the drug use or changes in my perception of him due to the long term psychological trauma to me caused by his abuse, manipulation, lies and the many disappointments / mistrust built up over the years.. that I am going to have trouble forgetting.

There are many reasons why ever having a normal relationship might be hard. Everyone associated with the drug use is forever changed by it. Can we ever truly forgive them and will they forgive us. Lots of water under the bridge and hurt feelings all around.

This post has been edited by BugginMe on April 14, 2018, 1:50 PM

Posted: April 14, 2018, 9:39 PM

Posts: 521
Joined: August 28, 2016

Bugs--your story and mine are a mirror image! My Chris at 47 is the same and will probably always be. I pray and wish it was different,but only God knows! That is where my faith and hope lay at this point in our relationship.

I know He is directing all this and I know in my heart that I am doing the right thing as difficult as it may be.

I pray for all of us and ask for direction and strength through all of this!


Posted: February 5, 2019, 1:48 AM

Posts: 5
Joined: February 5, 2019

I am a meth addict myself...my boyfriend introduced it to me a couple of years ago. I had never used a needle before but had been using one for about a year now..my boyfriend changed dramatically..he used to be very loving and trust worthy. He started lying..stealing from me my family our friends .hiding his phone...having multiple phones and numbers.even trying to get money from a guy known for trading money for sex..I am not sure if he actually did have sex for money he has alk kinds of dangerous behaviors .my boyfriend became very abusive physically and mentally...he gets delusional and sees things that aren't there...talks to himself. ..I have contracted Hepatitis B from him and was recently tested for HIV..and am waiting on the results for that. .my.health and my mental health is very poor. .I have lost my home. .my job..I had been living in a tent with him since March...he is now finally in a treatment program but I need to go to one too..my family doesn't know that I am still using so I don't know how to get help.
Posted: February 5, 2019, 2:01 AM

Posts: 5
Joined: February 5, 2019

Continued from last post. ..I don't know if my boyfriend will ever be the person that I fell in love with.. we both had jobs and a home. I don't know if I will ever feel normal again either..I have aged about 10 years in 2 years..people don't recognize me. .I am losing my teeth...I have been hospitalized 2:times...my heart is week..while I was in the hospital on a heart monitor and had had a mild heart attack due to my meth use..I was there for a week.. my boyfriend left me up there alone after the third day. not knowing if I was going to live or die...because he needed to get meth for himself...I found out that he and some other guys were making home made meth called shake and bake while I was in the hospital...I talk to him every other day and he thinks I am not using but I still have been..I don't steal or sell my self to get it..I have sold personal belongings and traded food stamps and things like that...I want to get clean. .I want my life back but it seems next to impossible...how will I ever trust him again....I have tried to distance myself from him but I know the man that he is inside bu because of the side effects of meth I don't know if he will ever return to himself or if I will either....
Posted: February 5, 2019, 6:17 AM

Posts: 478
Joined: November 9, 2018

Shanalee I'm sorry for everything you are going through. My opinion is you need to focus on yourself and not him. You have to get well for you. You need to put all the energy you put into him and apply it to yourself. I really hope you can find the resources to help you because we all deserve health and happiness. Please take good care of yourself and please get the help you need. Thinking of you, Sallyanna
Posted: February 6, 2019, 11:05 PM

Posts: 1745
Joined: June 27, 2016

Thank you for sharing your story. You can get help by going to a hospital detox and rehab. From there a social worker will find housing for you at sober living or facility of some sort depending on your insurance. be determined to live where ever they can find a bed. being sober in a hospital is better than impaired in a tent. forget about your bf. do what you need to, let him do what he needs to. the complications of the two of you together will not be good for successful recovery.

if you have any choices in location choose a place where you don't need a car to find a job.

This post has been edited by NyToFlorida on February 6, 2019, 11:05 PM
Posted: February 7, 2019, 12:18 AM

Posts: 326
Joined: December 23, 2018

Yes, I agree with NYtoFl & Sallyanna - first things first, get away from him & get into treatment for yourself!!
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