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Help With Meth Pshycosis For A Recovery Relative
Amanda






Posted: December 16, 2017, 11:51 PM
Really need help and advise. A family member who is recovering from being a meth addict (clean a year then relapsed about a month ago, but clean again 3 weeks now). He believes with everything in him that he has a tracking device implanted in him and the people who want to kill him sees everything he sees watches him through TV, hears him on the phone, etc. They are wanting to kill him, mock him and degrade him. He hears their voices clear as day constantly. He was starting to get a bit better before the relapse other than anxiety issues. He felt safe in my home. Now he belives they have followed him to my home, they are constantly watching him at the fence line, at his window, across the streat. He will not turn his phone on, watch tv, etc. because he can also hear them on the phone, he is extermly paranoid and is constantly hearing them. He was fine the first 2 weeks and now the 3rd week of being back this started. He is starting to scare me, he is getting too paranoid, angry, mad, thinks we are making fun of him, etc. He is not socolizing with us. He is extermly depressed and did attempt to cut his own wrist the other day. He never smiles and is so sad and cries. I came home from work today and he just hugged me and cried. He was always laughing, etc. before. He wants help but doesn't believe anyone can help him unless the device is removed. He has been seeing a theraphist and nothing is working. He is just getting worse. Believe me he is not on drug now, 100 sure. I feel that I cannot leave him alone because he is not thinking clearly and may try to kill himself or hurt someone else. I am all he has and I cannot turn my back on him. I feel he had some damamge from doing so much meth before but it had looked like he would be ok. After the relapse he seems to just getting worse. He was in and out of the hospital when on meth. He has seen professionals. I don't want him to go to a psycho ward and he does't want to go either. If thing get worse he may have no choice. I want to get him help. I was reading on this site and I see there are so many others expiancing what he is. Is there any help out there? Any recommendations. I told him I read about it and this is common and he jump up and thought he was going to hurt me for the first time and said "They are real! Not in his head." he ended up storming outside had a smoke and came in and went to bed. I am really worried and my husband isn't going to put up with much more. Plus I have a kid here. I don't want to have to send him away. Advise please.....


Posts: 640
Joined: April 4, 2016


Posted: December 18, 2017, 12:35 AM
Warm & loving welcome Amanda! So sorry that you are going through all that you are. Sending hugs & love.

My daughter's drug of choice is heroin. But one of my close gf's son's DOC is meth. This mom has described the same breaks with reality with her boy that you described in your post. Her boy hears voices that no one else hears. Sees things that no one else sees. Is paranoid. In fact, I think I recall her telling a story of her son being so high on meth that he laid out on a busy street and was not afraid of the cars whizzing by.

It seems that addiction and mental illness are a chicken and egg story. It also seems that once our kids are full-blown addicts, addiction and mental illness are Siamese Twins. I truly believe that you can't treat one without treating the other. Why? Because addiction is more than just taking dope . . . it is also a mind set, behavior patterns, a life style and a coping mechanism. Some people use drugs to self-medicate their pre-existing mental illness.

I know that as Moms it is in our genes to try to fix or help our loved ones. It sounds like your relative is schizophrenic in addition to being an addict. Will he attend a dual treatment program? There those professionals will deal with and treat both diseases. However, I've learned with my daughter that unless and until hubby & I changed there was no incentive for her to change. What incentive did she have to change when hubby & I were providing her a weekly allowance, sending clothes, buying food, paying for Ubers? Our enabling our child made us feel good . . . like we were doing something to help. But for her? Our enabling prevented her from desiring recovery/remission . . it kept her from feeling the consequences of her addiction . . . we kept her from hitting her rock bottom.

I am much more concerned about you and your family. Your post makes it sound like you all are walking on egg shells . . . living in a war zone . . . afraid that something you do will set him off. You are right to be worried. I am worried about your safety. Please do what you have to do to guarantee your safety!! Your relative is not in his right mind. His mind has been hi-jacked. His morals and values have morphed. The meth and/or his mental condition may cause him to hurt you . . .unintentionally. Shoot . . . he may not even remember what he did because his brain is scrambled. Don't create a situation where your unconditional love and devotion may lead to you or someone else in the household getting hurt.

How can you help your loved one? Focus on what you have control over. I'm sorry to tell you that you don't have control over him. You didn't cause his addiction. You can't cure it. And, you can't control it. Likewise, you can't control whether or when he seeks help for his mental illness. Or, if he seeks help, you can't control whether he takes his meds or sees his doctors. But here's the good news!! You do have control over something. You have control over YOU. This is not to say that you kick him to the curb and say, "Adios!" As a loving relative, we can never stop loving our family . . . no matter what. As a caretaking relative of an addict, we never stop having hope BUT we must make sure that we love ourselves as much as we love our addict. We have to take care of us to make sure that we don't get not only a front row seat on their roller coaster of addiction but also an invitation to actively participate (which results in us losing something . . . our minds, our sense of peace, our health, etc.)

My advice? Keep coming here for love, support, encouragement, advice, cyber hugs or just to vent. Read on this site the following posts: Ways Family Members Can Help, Will You Learn to Say No, What Not to Do. (I'll try to bump them up so you can find them.) Google detaching with love, co-dependency and enabling. Help yourself first. Regain the peacefulness and happiness in your home. It's time for you to go into recovery to help him.

Sending more love, hugs & prayers.
Lynn

This post has been edited by hurtingmom on December 18, 2017, 12:42 AM

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I forgot to read the fine print, when i signed up to be your Mom. I thought it would be smiles & hugs and quite a lot of fun.

I didn’t see the part about addiction, mental illness, pain, hopelessness or despair. I didn’t know life could be so flipping unfair.

But I now see something in the fine print that I didn’t see before. It also says to survive your addiction, I must love me more.


In Loving Memory of my angel, J. #forever21 #ihateaddiction #foreverloved


Posts: 521
Joined: August 28, 2016


Posted: December 18, 2017, 12:41 PM
Amanda--

I am the mom of a 47 y/o meth addict. The paranoia symptoms you listed are very common with meth addicts. My son was living with a non-drug user girlfriend and became so paranoid that he nailed all the windows shut, put cameras up on every door, and removed all electronics . He also believed that someone (mostly cops) was out to get him and were watching him day and night. He would be up all night patrolling the house and yard and watching for them. At one point he though a cop with a camera was outside the door and taking pictures through a small window at the top of the door. My son took a picture of what he thought was outside. He posted it on facebook because he was so convinced. The pic was blurry and you couldn't see anyone in it. He showed his GF and she said she couldn't see anyone. He threatened her until she agreed with him!

Finally she couldn't take it anymore and they moved and broke up, but the day they were moving the GF's father showed up to help and my son punched him and knocked him down. Cops came (for real) but just warned my son.

I broke contact with my son 6 months ago because he started threatening us and wishing were dead and said he would "pi---s on our graves. He then left and drove across our lawn and tore it all up while yelling out the window at us that we were sorry MF___ers! His violence was escalating and we needed to protect ourselves.

I can't express to you enough the danger you could be in. Meth addicts are not rational nor in control of their mental state. You have a child in this mix and you need to protect him or her and your family ASAP! Your addicted relative could snap at any time and harm all of you!

I would also recommend having the police involved when you evict him because he will not go without chaos! It isn't your responsibility to "fix" him or get him help. Your responsibility is to your family and it sounds like your husband has already had enough.

I am sorry if all this alarms you, but it should, as this is a serious matter at this stage of his addiction--

Prayers for you and your family--Lori


Posts: 384
Joined: October 25, 2016


Posted: December 19, 2017, 9:57 PM
My son is also a meth addict. I have been where you are many times. I don't have any answers but we have called the police and they hospitalized him at a psych hospital when he got really bad. He has to be a danger to himself or others. I have driven him to the psych hospital emergency room myself but quit doing that for safety. You can take him to a regular hospital emergency room but tell them it is a psych emergency and expect a possible fight from him. Unfortunately they only keep them 3 days to detox. After regular use of meth, this behavior is common. I don't know when it stops after they quit using .. not sure it ever completely stops but maybe gets better over time. My son only stops using for a little while so hard to tell. In our case, our sons behavior began to scare us and we no longer felt safe around him. We would not let him in our house and eventually stopped all contact. It makes me extremely sad especially during the holidays. He was often abusive, demanding, and delusional. Lied and manipulated constantly. Wanted money all the time. I never felt like he would intentionally hurt us but unintentionally became a concern. We needed distance after he got a gun for his protection. We were afraid to be around him after that. We were never sure what his state of mind might be when he came around.

I am hoping he can turn his life around. We have tried everything to help him and nothing worked. Maybe without us to fall back on he will decide this life is not what he wants.

This post has been edited by BugginMe on December 19, 2017, 10:03 PM

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BUGS


Posts: 733
Joined: October 5, 2015


Posted: December 19, 2017, 10:44 PM
Hi, I wouldn't think you or anyone else would be safe around this guy. He needs medical help and I don't think you know enough to help him. By the sound of the state he gets into with the paranoia, he's very dangerous. I would get in touch with his family or someone he may trust and get him out of your house. If he doesn't want them to help, then call the police and get them to help take him to the hospital. You have a child to protect. I couldn't sleep if I knew this guy was wandering about in my house. Your husbands right to want him gone. He needs professional help! Don't begin to think for a minute he understands you or you can reason or get through to him if he gets worse. He is sick! He needs medicine. Please be careful! Good luck to you. Mary.

This post has been edited by Mandm on December 19, 2017, 11:47 PM


Posts: 368
Joined: November 16, 2017


Posted: December 19, 2017, 11:40 PM
Wow, I am really sorry you are in this situation. It is shocking how many people are affected by these situations.

I agree with all the others. Please make sure you have a plan, and support, and protection...and, then, you must get him help and/or cut ties. It would be best if he thought you had as little to do with it as possible.For example, maybe his counselor could begin the process...

For his own sake, he needs to be hospitalized and placed on medications to control the delusions and hallucinations.

Stay safe. Keep sharing here.
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