My 18 Year Old Addict
Posted: July 11, 2016, 4:01 PM


Posts: 1
Joined: July 11, 2016



my son is addicted to weed and I'm sure he is on more than that I have just found out he has stolen ps3 games out of the house to sell for money.he broke my hand a week ago when he went off on one and jumped threw his bedroom window and left home sleeping rough we found him on the sunday and he came home. his attitude stinks we have tried to help him my husband wants to throw him out but I want to give him another chance
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Posted: July 12, 2016, 9:25 AM


Posts: 22
Joined: June 28, 2016



I don't know how long this has been going on, and I don't want to sound negative, but I am guessing this is not all new. I have never seen anyone act erratic (jumping out of windows) because of weed, or stealing things from home for that matter.

If this is new, he won't think there is any problem, and won't be receptive to your advice for seeking help. Worse yet, you will be in denial that there is really a problem, and you will talk, talk, give another chance, and another, and another. Just my experience.

Read many other people's stories on here. They are hauntingly familiar. If the PS3 games are the only things he has stolen, you are lucky. There will be more. Things you didn't even know were missing.

I would consider giving him choices. You and your husband decide what those choices are and then you have to stick to them...together. A mama's love is great at having hope that things will change, even when you keep doing the same things over and over with no different result. I love the quote that says something about you won't change the things that you are willing to tolerate.

I hope your son is just "going through a rebellious phase" but don't be blind or pretend everything will be just fine. I did that for way too long. It will consume you.

Good luck...read, read, read!

This post has been edited by momof9 on July 12, 2016, 9:27 AM
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Posted: July 13, 2016, 9:34 AM


Posts: 1573
Joined: June 27, 2016



I am going to be really blunt. He broke your hand. Put him out of the house. Sorry.

It will not get better. My son was not violent and he could not get away from the drugs on his own. Your son needs Rehab to stop. The only way to make it stop is to put him out. Do not give money.
Tell him where the state hospital and shelters are.

The sooner he gets help the better, getting clean will go on for years after they have stopped. So you are in for a long run.

Save yourself at this point. after he is a few years clean you can help him.
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Posted: August 20, 2016, 10:54 AM


Posts: 304
Joined: August 3, 2016



Beatrice
I wanted to say hi and see how things are going with your son?? I hope he asked for help.
Praying for you and your family.
Paula
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Posted: August 21, 2016, 7:27 AM


Posts: 635
Joined: April 4, 2016



Beatrice-

I'm so sorry that you are going through this and he is only 18. I understand and comprehend your feelings. This disease is horrible in general, but when it comes to young adults -- those who are barely or newly legal -- words cannot describe. My heart goes out to you. My daughter first started using pills and alcohol when she was 15. She became clean and sober for about 2 years. Went to college on an academic scholarship, too. But she found heroin while in college. She dropped out last December and now at the ripe old age of 21 is living in FL, looking for a job and allegedly going to treatment.

First, that's not plain vanilla weed he is smoking. I've NEVER heard of anyone getting violent or having mood swings from just smoking a joint or blunt. Nor have I ever heard of anyone pawning stuff for a nickle bag. Maybe it is synthetic weed or K2 or spice. In NYC not too long ago 30 people smoked the synthetic crap and had to be rushed to the hospital. Maybe he is buying the weed already laced with something. At one point in time, they were using embalming fluid to "enhance" weed. I think I also heard of using horse tranquilizers. Or, maybe he is mixing the weed with coke or something. In any event, it is NOT plain old marijuana.

Not everyone believes in snooping. I do and did, figuring it is my house, I pay the bills, I wouldn't get the truth from her if I asked and I needed to know. When she was in college or just living with us, I tossed her room regularly, went thru her purse, etc. Just call me Snoopy!! What kind of stuff are you finding? My bet is that he has more than rolling papers, bong, pipe, grinder. . . things you use for weed. You may find Straws, Spoons, Needles, Foil, Rolling Paper, waxy paper, money. This may help you know what he is using.

I know that he is young. He may or may not have graduated from high school. He may or may not have a job or other means of supporting himself. Your mama instincts probably want to protect him, to keep him in the nest as long as possible, to love his addiction away. I KNOW it is hard but you are now the Mama of an Addict. So make rules, set boundaries and be ready to enforce them. But don't let your mouth write a check that your butt can't cash. If you threaten to put him out for X and he does X, you have no choice but to put him out.

For my hubby and me, after she sold all our jewelry (including my wedding band), it was a no-brainer. We gave her a choice: rehab or the streets; But she was leaving our home in 24 hours.

This is not an easy journey. I am so sorry that you are on this path. My thoughts & prayers are with you and your son.

Hugs,
Lynn

--------------------

I forgot to read the fine print, when i signed up to be your Mom. I thought it would be smiles & hugs and quite a lot of fun.

I didn’t see the part about addiction, mental illness, pain, hopelessness or despair. I didn’t know life could be so flipping unfair.

But I now see something in the fine print that I didn’t see before. It also says to survive your addiction, I must love me more.


In Loving Memory of my angel, J. #forever21 #ihateaddiction #foreverloved
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Posted: August 21, 2016, 11:01 AM


Posts: 304
Joined: August 3, 2016



Beatrice
I understand your pain. My son is young also and all we want to do is fix it. After 8 years of trying I know I can't. Please get to an Alanon meeting and stay on here. It truly helps.
My son has been in rehab 9 days and I'm already thinking about 21 days and him getting out. I have to stop and refocus on me.......no enabling!!
Good luck
Prayers
Paula
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