Groveling At The Bottom
Posted: October 22, 2011, 1:33 AM

Posts: 9
Joined: October 22, 2011

I started taking vicodin for back pain and shortly went to oxycontin been to 3 rehabs and most recently started heroin in Feb. of this year. I have lost my biz, my wife, and sold my harley, boat and everything else I owned. I have lost my dignity and self respect. I have recently started using meth to get off heroin have not done heroin in 7 days, but now I am seriously considering death as a way out of this madness. I am so depressed, I have alienated myself from all who cared about me. Please someone give me a reason to live.
Posted: October 23, 2011, 12:41 AM

Posts: 3458
Joined: January 12, 2005

Dude, Your in a dark place, i can see. The money I have blown on dope is staggering as well, I mean STAGGERING. Could have bought and paid for a house, a nice house.. all wasted.
But the reason to hang on is that you can come back from this, alot have, and have rebuilt what they have lost. I am in that process as well. And at first it seemed unsurmountable, but I am getting there. You can too, it takes time though. Hang on brother, just hang on, there has to be one thing you can focus on that can get you through to the other side.

Posted: October 23, 2011, 11:33 AM

Posts: 20
Joined: September 26, 2011

There is always something to be grateful for....
Do you have someone you can talk to about this ?

user posted image
Posted: October 24, 2011, 12:53 PM

Posts: 20396
Joined: February 12, 2004

Mike..are you there?

If you are still feeling like this, please call 911. You need help sweetheart. If you want to talk to us, post, check in..we're here. But if you feel like hurting yourself, please call for help.

There is hope. And where there is hope, there is life. Do you have a friend you can call?

I used Drugs to forget, I got clean to remember.
Posted: October 24, 2011, 2:50 PM

Posts: 2616
Joined: January 4, 2008

CG...he's working on it and doing ok...he checked in.....cant tell ya where for nefarious medical;ll have to take our word...very GRATEFUL he made it thru the nite though.....

Posted: October 24, 2011, 3:51 PM

Posts: 9
Joined: October 22, 2011

Hey all the lights came back on. Im ok, and have not used today. I am extremly worn out however so going to bed. Thank you for the encouragement.

Michael J.
Posted: October 24, 2011, 4:34 PM

Posts: 267
Joined: September 22, 2011

Good to see you back Mike
get some rest, go to NA
You still may need DETOX

Best wishes

Dr. Irab
retired psychiatrist
freebaser of cocaine for 2 years +alcohol
c/s 12 yrs thru 12 step.
Former Medical Director:
Methadone Maintenance Clinic.
Posted: October 25, 2011, 1:31 AM

Posts: 5418
Joined: September 12, 2004

Hi Mike,

Go to NA and reach out, you need help. There is hope.

Meditation: It's is not what you think.
Posted: October 25, 2011, 3:34 AM

Posts: 1067
Joined: November 19, 2005

Hi Mike and welcome. TCCME said it best. "Hang on brother, just hang on". Chase recovery like you chased you drugs. Please find an NA/AA meeting and GO. JUST GO. So many here have been in your shoes. As addicts we like to have things change overnight. It is a one day at a time and when you can focus on recovery-the sky is the limit. Please don't ever give up hope.
Keep coming back. Let us know how you are doing.

[FONT=Arial]I am an addict. I can not use any mind or mood altering chemicals successfully.[COLOR=purple]
Posted: October 25, 2011, 12:40 PM

Posts: 20396
Joined: February 12, 2004

I saw where you guys had him on the heroin board Con..thank God.

So glad you're doing ok Mike. Gotta lot of people here rooting for you.

It's going to be a bumpy ride, so don't let your butt fall off.

I used Drugs to forget, I got clean to remember.
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