Xanax And Muscle Relaxers Are Ruling My Life
Posted: April 11, 2014, 3:41 PM

Posts: 1
Joined: April 11, 2014

This is my first time posting. My daughter suggested a message board. I'm completely hooked and abuse Xanax and muscle relaxers. Have been for many years. I have chronic pain, had two back surgeries, but I could go cold turkey with my hydrocodone. No problem. I don't drink. My husband does. Not to excess. But he makes me feel like I'm a junkie, hiding my dirty little secret while he can drink out in the open. No judgement (he says). I have some major stressors in my life. I'm a person who wants to be in control about my family but I'm a hypocrite because the punishment/payoff are the pills. I'm afraid to reach out to my doctors. I'm very afraid of withdrawals. I feel like I'm going to lose my mind. Climb the walls. I nearly overdosed a few months ago. I thought that would end it. Before too long I was back taking the pills. I'm tired of the stigma that my family puts on me. "Just be happy!!" "Why,is it so hard?" "Just put them down!" They have no idea. I've gained weight. My family is very fitness oriented. "Just workout!" "Just start running!", "Don't eat this or that!" Are you kidding me???? I can't even believe they say things like that!!! I'm at the end of my rope. I don't know what to do from here. Help?
Posted: May 6, 2014, 3:01 PM

I was on xanax for more than 12 years. It started out slowly but revved up from .25 mgs to 6 mgs and sometimes much more very quickly. I often mixed alcohol with xanax. It is a very difficult drug to put down. I started using the pill because I felt crazy and xanax took away all my worries and problems. Not feeling like a lunatic was complete and beautiful euphoria. Then the little b****** pill will turn on you and there is no telling as to how much you will lose. My story is probably unique but then again benzo users are all playing with fire. I had to go in patient for 8 days to detox because there is a risk of seizures during withdrawal. The part they do not tell you is that you are still crazy which is why you were on xanax to begin with in the first place. Therefore, you must go to an AA meeting and talk to people about what you are going through because you are a drug addict, make no mistake about it. You can not put down that little pill and you know it. I tried everything to get away from xanax and it just did not work until I went the full distance. If you find out you do not belong in a 12 step meeting you can always stop attending. My heart goes out to the "still suffering" addict.
But, there is definitely hope. It sounds like you have had enough pain and when it hurts so bad that all you want to do is crawl up and die...You may be ready and if it hurts enough you will do anything to stop the misery and pain. I hope and pray that you find an answer and I hope that my message helped.
Posted: September 8, 2014, 11:31 PM

Hey everyone...just wanted to check in and Let you know that there is hope....just fighting!!
Posted: November 28, 2014, 11:36 AM

Question regarding an addiction to anti depressants and crystal meth. I know the difference in the 2 drugs. I understand one may be prescibed and the other is not. Addiction is addiction correct? Having a compete breakdown, threatening to kill yourself, having your son stay with you afraid that something will happen is not considered an addict? If I can hear from just anyone regarding this matter and if someone could explain the difference in addictions I would really appreciate it.
Posted: November 28, 2014, 12:59 PM

Posts: 1906
Joined: October 23, 2011

I find that Alcoholics Anonymous describes alcoholism/addiction quite well in their Big Book.

HOW IT WORKS in Chapter 5 talks about the blindness, stubbornness and mental/emotional problems that we deal with to some degree .. all of us.

My recovery began in 1989 in a recovery home that treated all addictions. We were all mixed together in groups and I soon saw that once the drug of choice was removed that we all suffered from the same thinking/mental/emotional/spiritual problems .

An AA friend put it so well recently when he said there was only 2 things he couldn't tolerate:
1) The way things are.
2) Change

I find that most of us can identify with that.

All the best.

Bob R

Serenity Prayer
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.

Free copy of AA's Big Book on-line: http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/alcoh...olics-anonymous

Free copy of NA's Big Book on-line:
Copy & Paste coastalcarolinaarea.org/literature/books/b_t.pdf

Copy & paste www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-10_howitworks.pdf



--- driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity.

---there are those too who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest.

... I need AA more than it needs me.

--- I fight recovery tooth and nail....
I'm not used to being sane, it just doesn't seem natural.

...... According to the great spiritual teachers, ignorance does not result from what we don’t know; ignorance results from what we think we do know.

---Some think that 2+2=5 and believe it.
Some know that 2+2=4 and can't stand it.

--- I didn't have a very happy childhood
but I sure am having a long one !

---Dry since 1989
working daily on getting/staying SOBER.

---If you want to drink, that's your business
...If you want to quit, that's AA's business.

... Tell me, I'll forget;
... Show me, I'll remember;
... Engage me, I'll understand.

---Most problems are psychological.
Most solutions are spiritual .

"If we try to change our ego with the help of our ego, we only have a better-disguised ego."
--Richard Rohr

WWBWD (What Would Bill W. Do)
Posted: December 4, 2014, 7:16 PM

Posts: 4
Joined: December 4, 2014

Thank you for posting this! Its been so long since I've read this or even picked up an as or an book. This brought me to tears because I remember when I was clean and sober and I want to get back to that place of happiness. I've got to go back to my meetings. I stopped going and now I'm in worse shape than I was I know now that I need them
Posted: February 9, 2016, 10:36 AM

Posts: 3
Joined: February 9, 2016

I bonded out of jail my grandson who is addicted to Xanax and pain killers. He is confined to our area at this time. He is still using and a problem for everyone. His dad thinks we should let him go and of course that would be the easy way to solve the problem. My question here is , when he goes to his hearing and if he is put on probation, will we still be financially responsible for his actions? That is one reason for taking care at this point, we don't want to be slapped with the fine if he gets into trouble.
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