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Going To Treatment For The First Time


Posts: 5
Joined: September 24, 2016


Posted: September 24, 2016, 8:48 PM
I have been using cocaine for 15 years now, I have now been clean for 30 days, and about to enter a addictions treatment program on the 3rd. I was scared to walk away from my kids, my girl, my family and my career, and I lost them all anyway. I am terrified, can someone please tell me any of their experiences(either good or bad) with treatment? I have signed up for a 16 week program and I do not know what I will do to cope.....


Posts: 1906
Joined: October 23, 2011


Posted: September 24, 2016, 9:50 PM
I attended a 90 day recovery program in 1989.

I was scared as #ell to go and after the 90 days I was scared to leave.
After the 90 day program I committed to AA/NA and attend regularly today.

Life has never been better.

All the best.

Bob R

--------------------
Serenity Prayer
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.


Free copy of AA's Big Book on-line: http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/alcoh...olics-anonymous

Free copy of NA's Big Book on-line:
Copy & Paste coastalcarolinaarea.org/literature/books/b_t.pdf


AA's HOW IT WORKS:
Copy & paste www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-10_howitworks.pdf


NA's HOW IT WORKS:
http://www.na.org/admin/include/spa...0it%20Works.pdf


----------------------------------------------------------------

--- driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity.

---there are those too who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest.

... I need AA more than it needs me.

--- I fight recovery tooth and nail....
I'm not used to being sane, it just doesn't seem natural.


...... According to the great spiritual teachers, ignorance does not result from what we don’t know; ignorance results from what we think we do know.

---Some think that 2+2=5 and believe it.
Some know that 2+2=4 and can't stand it.


--- I didn't have a very happy childhood
but I sure am having a long one !


---Dry since 1989
working daily on getting/staying SOBER.


---If you want to drink, that's your business
...If you want to quit, that's AA's business.


... Tell me, I'll forget;
... Show me, I'll remember;
... Engage me, I'll understand.


---Most problems are psychological.
Most solutions are spiritual .


"If we try to change our ego with the help of our ego, we only have a better-disguised ego."
--Richard Rohr


WWBWD (What Would Bill W. Do)


Posts: 5
Joined: September 24, 2016


Posted: September 24, 2016, 10:17 PM
Thank you Bob


Posts: 288
Joined: October 12, 2006


Posted: September 25, 2016, 9:22 AM
Can you be more specific about what your fears are?

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JEN

I have not been given a spirit of fear but of power,love and a sound mind.


Posts: 5
Joined: September 24, 2016


Posted: September 25, 2016, 2:27 PM
Jen - I guess the fear of the unknown? I am a chef by trade and drug culture is everywhere in the industry, so counsellors have suggested looking for new career. I am worried I have caused to much of a void with my kids and my family and that it may be beyond repair. I know I am doing to right thing, I need help, but I have been an addict for so long, I just dont know what kind of person I will be when all is said and done. And I worry about the post rement triggers, and I pray I am strong enough to overcome them.
Soberturtle






Posted: September 25, 2016, 3:03 PM
Hey

Congrats on 30days!!!!

You have been using for 15 years. You do not even know what it would be like to be "normal".

What is normal- i do not know. But we used for so long- we do not know anything different then living "the addict life" every single thing we did, where we went, our relationships,our work, our bank account, our reactions every descision we made were according to our addiction.


Believe me, it feels good to be free. To get rid of those chains. Give it some time. Feels really good to be free. We were in prison.

You need a permanent daily program of recovery as well- we have a disease which lies.

Are you planning on going to NA CA? Working steps witha sponsor?


Posts: 5
Joined: September 24, 2016


Posted: September 25, 2016, 3:27 PM
I have been going to meetings, and will continue while at treatment, haven't found a sponsor as of yet because I have done my 30 days in a different city then I live and where the treatment center is, so Im waiting untill I start on the 3rd to find a home group, thank you for the kind words I find talking about what I am feeling is helping the most.
Soberturtle






Posted: September 25, 2016, 5:06 PM
Keep posring then- and we will keep replying :)

Remember big will- we are sick and a sick mind cannot heal a sick mind..that is why we need a program of recovery ...a daily one..... i found mine in AA/ NA ...with a great sponsor and working my steps.

The easy part is getting clean then comes life.....

Remember .... your brain can tell you lies. It can tell you just once more....it can tell you that you are healed.

Here is my favourite from AA:

"We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago."

You like writing- why don't you post all the negatives that happened in your life because of your addiction and how it is starting to feel different.

I agree and most will- writing and sharing is such a powerful tool!



Posts: 288
Joined: October 12, 2006


Posted: September 26, 2016, 7:58 AM
Bigwill......first things first. Try not to project too much into the future. NO ONE knows that you will need to change careers ...sometimes its a good idea but I know many in recovery that still bartend and waitress ect , and are always around alcohol and they do ok...in fact for them its a good reminder of how they DONT want to be. That decision can be made later and only YOU will know whats best. Also maybe you WANT to do something else...something you always dreamed of doing...who knows? But NOTHING is really possible until you get the monkey off your back so start with that...get a good foundation!

I have thoroughly enjoyed treatment. We RARELY get a chance in our lives to "get away from it all" and REALLY focus on only OURSELVES.The outside pressures of the world are gone for a short time. Use it to your advantage ...get the most out of it by being completely present and open minded. It REALLY is a chance of a lifetime!

We are getting chance to COMPLETELY start over...its seriously awesome as hell!

If you keep putting one foot in front of the other and doing the next right thing there is a VERY good chance that friends and family WILL come around. Its our ACTIONS not WORDS they are looking for.

Its all about perspective....Its really helped me to look at the situation as IM NOT GIVING ANYTHING UP, IM GETTING EVERYTHING....when we put down the drugs we GAIN SO MUCH! This is the time when you simply have to TRUST the process ..it can be hard sometimes but we really have to believe in ALL the people that "trudged this road of happy destiny" that it can, does, will, GET BETTER. There is absolutely no motivation for these others in recovery to blow smoke...there is NOTHING in it for them to lie about such a thing.

I hope this makes sense...

--------------------

JEN

I have not been given a spirit of fear but of power,love and a sound mind.


Posts: 5
Joined: September 24, 2016


Posted: September 26, 2016, 8:32 PM
Soberturtle and Jen-

Thank you so much, youve both given me a very positive perspective, to the point where I creid happy tears. I does help so much to know that I am not alone. I was/am so scared about what the future holds, but taking it one day at a time is all I can do, I plan on posting my progress(good and ) as I go, and just knowing there are people who have fought and are still fighting the the battle I am, its very calming.

Thank you all for this!


Posts: 288
Joined: October 12, 2006


Posted: September 27, 2016, 7:01 AM
You are very welcome! Please keep posting and know we are all pulling for you!

--------------------

JEN

I have not been given a spirit of fear but of power,love and a sound mind.


Posts: 5
Joined: September 24, 2016


Posted: September 28, 2016, 1:40 PM
I will keep posting! I go in on the 3rd and I will update whenever I can


Thank you all


Posts: 288
Joined: October 12, 2006


Posted: October 8, 2016, 1:06 PM
Bigwill I just wanted you to know Im thinking about you and hope you are doing well!


--------------------

JEN

I have not been given a spirit of fear but of power,love and a sound mind.
bigwill






Posted: October 23, 2016, 10:49 AM
I am doing great!!! treatment has been much better then I ever thought. I am going to 5 meetings a week and have a sponsor, I has also applied to a few post treatment housing programs, Ill be out on January 3rd. 2017 is the first year of the new, sober, healthy me, and I couldn't be more excited!! thank you all for reading and your support :)
Soberturtle






Posted: October 23, 2016, 12:27 PM
Great news Big Will!!!
Keep it up!!!

Congrats :))

Keep telling us about your journey and spread the hope


Posts: 288
Joined: October 12, 2006


Posted: October 24, 2016, 7:42 AM
Oh GREAT!!! Im so glad you answered back....Im SO happy for you!


--------------------

JEN

I have not been given a spirit of fear but of power,love and a sound mind.


Posts: 529
Joined: October 15, 2016


Posted: October 28, 2016, 11:11 AM
Well done, well done indeed :) i took coke only few times really but did have crack addiction for several years until one day i sold my music, every record and cd i had i sold it and no need to tell you how awful i felt day after when crack was gone and money too... that day was my last day i ever smoked crack , this was about 9 or 10 years or maybe 11 years ago, i dont think i dont crave and i dont count that is why i dont know exactly when i stopped i just know i been saying i am free 8 years for few years lol so by now must be 10 or so. Must say stopping crack maybe wasn't that hard because i still had heroin?? I stopped together with my partner , we first didnt use for several days then had some then it was 1 week then had some then few weeks and after on and off for about 2 months we stopped all together and of course it wasn't easy, i use to dream about pipe and taste ... but with time passing it does get easier and easier until you forget how it is to be under the influence, you forget the feeling and that is what i wanted to tell. Good luck with your recovery, all the best :)

This post has been edited by Bonnie5 on October 28, 2016, 11:13 AM
bigwill






Posted: January 23, 2017, 12:20 PM
Just wanted to let everyone know that I am out of treament and doing great, thanks for all the support!! More to come


Posts: 3
Joined: January 26, 2017


Posted: January 26, 2017, 11:39 AM
Hi,

i am a recovering cocaine addict, i have recently started the 12 step programme with CA.

Its hard but the benifits on the other end are so much more worth it.



Posts: 433
Joined: December 14, 2009


Posted: January 26, 2017, 5:07 PM
Now there's some happy post, great to hear about people doing well.

Keep it up.

Be Well,
Larry

--------------------
All gods send their drunks to AA

My story.. https://www.addictionrecoveryguide.o...ST&f=16&t=63644
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