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Checking In


Posts: 3
Joined: July 23, 2019


Posted: July 23, 2019, 8:44 AM
It’s been so long since I communicated on this site...but it WAS the first step in a long journey of recovering from a gnarly pain pill addiction. I’m so lucky I made it through to living a pill free life...
I don’t remember my “nickname” on this site...but I do remember how much wisdom, love and support there was here. It was a lifeline.

I got clean in 2006, just after my fathers death. I very naively opted for the “cold turkey” method and boy was I in for a ride. I lived and breathed this site, as I had no idea what was happening to me...physically or emotionally. But, I strung 28 days together and once I had 28, I just kept adding them.

I see Kat and 12 Stepper here, and Cowgirl...and I remember the support. Thank you! It’s 13 years later...and with humility and gratitude, I can say, I love my life. I’ve forgiven myself, and everyone else who ever harmed me. I am so fortunate...deeply, deeply, fortunate.


Posts: 32
Joined: July 16, 2019


Posted: July 23, 2019, 5:44 PM
Sara H:

It's great that you have come in from the cold! But I wouldn't expect that after 28 days that you were over, the guilt, shame and remorse over going back out. Frankly, so others don't get hurt by the wrong impression, it appears you are claiming more recovery than is possible.

Still, don't let that discourage your continued recovery.


Posts: 3
Joined: July 23, 2019


Posted: July 24, 2019, 7:44 AM
Hi Sober...
I think I clearly stated 13 years and that after 28 days, I felt I could do 29, and after 29, 30...and so on...and, the journey never ends! I’m still unpacking, still growing, still falling in love with myself a little deeper everyday.

And I’m still so incredibly grateful and humble that I never picked up again...because without sobriety I could have never gotten to “the work” of my issues. Sure I experienced guilt and shame, made plenty messes of things, but I was sober, so I could confront it, incrementally of course, but none of it would have been possible without day 1, or day 2, 3...

28 days was a real milestone for me personally and that milestone gave me hope. We must never give up hope.


Posts: 6300
Joined: May 27, 2005


Posted: July 24, 2019, 8:05 AM
*waving* Hi sayrah! Congratulations! on 13 years. It's changed quite a bit here since then but some things never change LOL

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१२ स्तैप्पैर!


kat11100@comcast.net

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you;
that is the principal difference between a dog and a man.
Mark Twain

Just because the monkey's off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town

Laugh because it shows people that you have what they want and what they need: a hope in things unseen, a peace that passes understanding, and a God of miracles who also has a great sense of humor.



Posts: 3
Joined: July 23, 2019


Posted: July 29, 2019, 11:47 AM
Hey Kat! *big huge waves*
Gosh, it has changed...no activity!?!

This site and the support I got here were so helpful to me...I’m sorry to see the drop in participation.
I was trying to recall the ladies name that gave such solid support and insightful help. I believe her name was Denise. She had a lot of clean time under her belt, and I always read her words intently. I moved out west and sort of lost touch, but I checked in once and her daughter posted that she had overdosed...it broke my heart. Do you remember this or her?


Posts: 6300
Joined: May 27, 2005


Posted: July 30, 2019, 8:11 AM
Yes I remember Denise. I knew her from the Pills Anonymous site many years ago. I even met her when she was here on vacation. We were all sad to hear of her death. Goes to show you relapse can happen to anyone.

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१२ स्तैप्पैर!


kat11100@comcast.net

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you;
that is the principal difference between a dog and a man.
Mark Twain

Just because the monkey's off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town

Laugh because it shows people that you have what they want and what they need: a hope in things unseen, a peace that passes understanding, and a God of miracles who also has a great sense of humor.



Posts: 6750
Joined: September 15, 2005


Posted: August 1, 2019, 9:57 PM
Denise was someone who helped me during a rough spot. She was fun to talk to. Not that I have to tell anybody but it’s an awful disease and we fight it each day.

Just got out of hospital July 5th. Had another stroke. Lucked out. But It’s very scary because they don’t know why they are happening. Sadly the board has gone its way but I have a lot of support thank God.

Hello kat.

Have a good evening.

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It is Just Not worth it.

"Inside every older person is a younger person
wondering what the puck happened."

One Day At A Time
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