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5 Months

Posts: 3075
Joined: January 11, 2006

Posted: June 26, 2020, 11:27 AM
I made it another month. Why does it feel like really forever ?! I guess I have done this a few times. I dont think "I got it" not by a long shot. Ive gained about 10 pounds which I thought I might. I like to swap small piece of chocolate for smokes. They add up. I feel ok. I am feeling stronger all the time. The obsession has been removed and I only have some cravings that are strong. They are going away quickly. Im grateful I have stuck with it this long but totally realize I only have today. I can't have even one puff. I get angry a lot which I hope will subside its crazy how angry I get. Hopefully it will give way to tears. Hopefully I will soften.
I am grateful for the amazing program of AA and working the steps again Codey steps with an AA sponsor. Its helping I am writing out a step 4. We are meeting every week on Sunday. I go to a virtual meeting with her every week. We have just clicked and I knew God would bring me someone. Its been almost a year. I feel like I am finally begining to heal. Thank you God AA and asponsor and my previous sponsor I love her so much she helped set a strong foundation. I met her here and she has a permanent piece of my heart. We dont talk but she is always there tucked inside my heart & mind. Full of gratitdue and humble heart for what i have been given.

My success story

Beliefs have the power to create and the power to destroy.
Human beings have the awesome ability
to take any experience of their lives
and create a meaning that disempowers them
or one that can literally save their lives.

- Anthony Robbins

Sometimes I lay awake at night and wonder where I've gone wrong. Then a little voice inside my head says,
"This is going to take more than one night."

"Ring the bells that still can ring.
Forget your perfect offering.
There is a crack in everything.
That's how the light gets in."
-Leonard Cohen

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