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Posted: June 26, 2020, 11:27 AM
I made it another month. Why does it feel like really forever ?! I guess I have done this a few times. I dont think "I got it" not by a long shot. Ive gained about 10 pounds which I thought I might. I like to swap small piece of chocolate for smokes. They add up. I feel ok. I am feeling stronger all the time. The obsession has been removed and I only have some cravings that are strong. They are going away quickly. Im grateful I have stuck with it this long but totally realize I only have today. I can't have even one puff. I get angry a lot which I hope will subside its crazy how angry I get. Hopefully it will give way to tears. Hopefully I will soften.
I am grateful for the amazing program of AA and working the steps again Codey steps with an AA sponsor. Its helping I am writing out a step 4. We are meeting every week on Sunday. I go to a virtual meeting with her every week. We have just clicked and I knew God would bring me someone. Its been almost a year. I feel like I am finally begining to heal. Thank you God AA and asponsor and my previous sponsor I love her so much she helped set a strong foundation. I met her here and she has a permanent piece of my heart. We dont talk but she is always there tucked inside my heart & mind. Full of gratitdue and humble heart for what i have been given. Love, Jane -------------------- My success story Beliefs have the power to create and the power to destroy. Human beings have the awesome ability to take any experience of their lives and create a meaning that disempowers them or one that can literally save their lives. - Anthony Robbins Sometimes I lay awake at night and wonder where I've gone wrong. Then a little voice inside my head says, "This is going to take more than one night." "Ring the bells that still can ring. Forget your perfect offering. There is a crack in everything. That's how the light gets in." -Leonard Cohen ![]() |
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