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Posted: May 19, 2017, 9:02 AM
He got served today. He texted me begging to come, please don't yell at me. I got caught up trying some new stuff.
Long story short, a few hours later, he tells me to f off because I told him to check into detox. He finally showed up. The police right behind me. Said he never threatened me, etc. They let him take a few clothes before he left. He kept saying your tripping to me, you dont love me. I ignored him. Had a hard time leaving. Told the police he is using. We could have handled this on our own. I talked to one of his daughter's tonight. I told her everything he has done to me. Sneaking off to his drug *****, still talking to her behind my back after I told him to stop talking to her. Didnt find out what exactly has gone on between them until she sent him a snap chat asking to make live tonight if I get a hotel room. I will give you drugs if that is what you want. He said he doesnt do anything with her. His daughter said I wouldnt put up with his butt either. You should have called me. Try to see what I could do to help. You know he isnt going to hurt you. I told her he is using badly, and some other things he has done, I dont trust him right now. | ||
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Posted: May 24, 2017, 3:53 PM
His daughters' and the youngest one's(the one who hates him) boyfriend and his friend came by yesterday to gather his belongings. They are very ticked off about this whole situation. They are storing his things at their house, which they don't have room. She hates one of his dogs. They are not paying a storage unit for him. Her boyfriend said he is sorry he did this to me.
They didn't rent a big enough U-Haul, and didn't realize how much he actually had here at my home. They cleared everything out of the house and garage. The younger daughter is letting me use the couch I have stored here until her friend moves into her apartment. Her boyfriend said I will even bring it in the house for you. What are you to going to sit on? They didn't have room to take it. When they looked in the shed, and realized they had no room for those belongings, they were livid. Didn't know what to do. How to get everything out of here today and where to put all of this stuf. I said if you want to come back and get them after your trip, I can hold on to it. The boyfriend's friend said, works for me. The older daughter said, well you wanted it all out of here, so we are here. I said how are you hauling it out? The younger daughter said we can come back and go through it when we get back into town. I know the younger daughter didn't mean to snap, she is just hurt and angry right now. She said when looking in the shed, "he can't even be here to get his own stuff". I didn't say anything. The older one said he should have gotten his stuff out of there the 1st time. Yesterday morning, they texted me saying, "if you want the stuff out, today is the only day we can do it". I thought that was strange. I thought we decided this on Saturday. We all thought it was a form of manipulation on their part including their dad's to see if I am really going through with this. We also feel he was hoping maybe I would let him come back home and this was another way out for me to drop it and let us carry on as usual, because they are tired of him, don't want to deal with this, and he doesn't want to leave town. They probably don't want him back home either where they are flying him to, but everyone feels stuck. It would have been the same thing different day for me with him. I don't think so! Nobody brought up the order, on what I decided to do. At this point, I am letting it be. If he has the balls to challenge it, let him. It would only open the door for him to be able to contact me and harass me. I don't want to hear it. Two nights after he got kicked out of here, my son's father's van was egged during the night. a few days later, an older pickup truck drove by his house very slow and followed him out of the neighborhood. My ex made an immediate u turn to see what they would do. They did the same thing and kept on going. We don't have proof this guy is involved in these events, but it is coincidental. I want to say this guy didn't do it because he has been stuck at his daughter's place all week and has no car. But it doesn't mean he would give somebody his address to go do something. They had no room in the car to take the dogs. They asked if I could keep them for the night. I said yes. They will be by today to pick them up. Last night when I was cleaning the bedroom, I found a backpack behind the entertainment center. I never saw it before. I opened it up. There was a pair of women's lacy underwear(used and lightly stained) along with a black camisole. Nothing else. I was like, uh, huh, liar. This wasn't from the last time he disappeared last week because he came home empty handed. Locked outside until served. Last month when he came home, he was empty handed too. I am saying it is either that drug ***** that he still talks to or someone else, he may have met online. When his daughters' come for the dogs, I am showing this to them. He told them he stopped talking to that chic. He isn't doing anything, or wasn't cheating on me. Yeah right! So glad he is gone! Wish I would have had the strength to do this a long time ago! My bad! I feel played. If and when he should contact me, I am not going back to him. Even if he has his act together. I will lay this all out on the table. He may love me like he tells me and everyone else, and wants to marry me down the road, but this is not a way to treat someone you LOVE. Addiction or not! I am so angry. Not even as his friend. The reason I said the above paragraph is because I met the older daughter the night after I tossed him out. She said, do you even want to talk to him? You can't because of the order. He is going back home out of state for 6 months to have a place to live, and work. Save cash to come to town and get settled. But he isn't going back to your house. I said he isn't. I told her, I don't want to live with a man, any man, unless I marry them. She said tell him this. I thought this was very strange. I know you are extremely angry at your dad for what he did to me. I just left him high and dry and he is your problem. Why would she say this? Trying to feel me out for possible reconciliation when he should return back here? I don't trust him! | ||
Posts: 733
Joined: October 5, 2015
Posted: May 24, 2017, 10:18 PM
Hi Sunny, Good job! They will be desperate for you to go back with him. Then he will be once again your problem and your worry, not theirs! Whether he loves you or not...your better to be done with him and thank your lucky stars you got away and didn't marry him. If you read other posts on here you'll see women who did marry addicts and had children and don't know what to do because their devastated. It's heartbreaking! Time heals all and you'll eventually meet someone nice who will treat you good. Be wary now and whatever you do don't go back with this guy. If you can move house, I'd move and don't let any of his family know where you go to? It might do you good to get a fresh start away from there anyway. Spring clean him right up and out! Stay strong! I'm proud of you!! Good luck. Mary💜
This post has been edited by Mandm on May 24, 2017, 10:43 PM | ||
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Posted: May 26, 2017, 2:14 AM
Last night, one daughter told me he that she wanted wanted me to know he apologizes for everything, for a lot of things he did.
I just wanted to let you know he actually took a chance and reached out to me this morning. He legally can't because of the order, but I did tell her he can only if he can be civil. If not. lose my number! He texted me on a friend's phone. He said he is sorry for what he put me through. He seen all my text going back a couple months. Saying how I wanted help for him. I just pray that you can forgive me. I never lied about loving you. He feels like crap because you know I don't like cops. And on that message that said f o**, that was a typo(sure, when I told him go to detox). I would have told you over the phone, but no answer. Are you going to answer? I told him I would but no more drama. You hurt me in a bad way. He said he is really sorry. He realizes he is more messed up than he thought. Mad at himself for his weaknesses. He is supposedly back home now. Hopefully, this is what he needs to pull himself together. We shall see. I am NOT initiating ANY contact with him. Time to move on from this ;) | ||
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Posts: 733
Joined: October 5, 2015
Posted: May 26, 2017, 8:16 AM
Hi Sunny, Boy he has a nerve! Yes he's sorry until the next time! They don't just quit drugs and the next week their better. I'm into this drug addiction with my daughter 18 yrs, soon to be 19 yrs!! I always thought she would quit and get better but now I don't! I try to live my life as best I can. It's all we can do because living with a drug addict will kill us before it kills them. That's how I think now. It's not good but it's what happens after years of broken promises and heartache. Don't put yourself through this. Find someone like yourself who doesn't come with all this guys baggage. His daughters are more than happy to try get you two back together. They don't want the burden of him coming to them, and they are a burden! Don't fall for it! The very same ones wouldn't put up with a boyfriend like their father. Your a smart girl and you don't need this guy. There's someone else out there for you. Change your phone number and get away from that whole family as quick as you can! Start a fresh new life! Good luck Sunny you deserve to have a good happy life. Don't settle for less because life goes in fast and it's shorter than you think. Take care of you! I wish you well. Mary💜
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Posted: May 26, 2017, 10:26 PM
Sunny girl, your story isn't mine but the outcomes are similar.
Needless to say, after many chances, my ex *coke addict" violently attacked me. Thank God for these ladies on this board giving me guidance and support. I listened to everything except the restraining order. This happened a month ago. I've had one one-sided convo with him. He apologized, he cried, he begged, he pleaded, he wants to get married, he LIED. Like you, i screamed 3 words to him "You hurt me" i caught myself, i felt 2 things, myself becoming weak for his lies and him getting everything off his chest so he could try to live with himself. After i came back to my senses a slammed down the phone, blocked my numbers, deleted and blocked him from FB, changed gyms. I did a double take when i read what you wrote about him contacting you, it was like a deja vu moment. The ladies on this board warned me that he would try to contact me. They've been on point about it all. I suggest you listen. They are right, you NEED ZERO contact. Let him go about his merry way. You let him back in, the lies, drug use, cheating will begin within 2 weeks or less. Heal your heart and keep it moving. It was the best advice given to me. Yes, i have many lonely days but guess what i am at peace, and dude is still on drugs, although he said, he's clean now and goes to church 3x a week, yeah right. That's what i get for picking up the phone and listening. I have ZERO contact. You don't need him as a friend. Friends like them, who needs enemies. Again thank you ladies, i am healing and making myself the priority. -------------------- Last days | ||
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