post replypost new topic
Still Here. Still Hoping.


Posts: 28
Joined: March 23, 2012


Posted: June 4, 2013, 5:22 PM
I held true to my word. I broke up with him and put him and his brother out of my place back in February. I still talk to him through text or what not every now and then. Even see him once in a blue moon

All he does is tell me how good he is doing and how much he misses me, loves me and wants me back. That he would do anything I wanted or needed him to do.

I just don't know if I can. Or if I will ever be able to. My friend keeps blasting all the negative stuff to me. She knows I love him and what he put me through. But I know the good times. And the stuff I do miss.

I'm not saying I want him back, but over time if he changed wouldn't it maybe be worth a second chance? That's what I think about.

I know I am the only one who can make that decision.

Opinions? Advice?

I'm still working on me. I don't worry about him and everyone one says I seem happier and free. And I feel it but I do miss him.

Hope everyone is well!


Posts: 10
Joined: March 18, 2013


Posted: June 5, 2013, 10:58 AM
Hello

I read your post and it sounded almost parallel to what I have been through. That is very good that you have stuck to your word and kept at it.

I think that it is wonderful that so many people have told you that you seem happier.

I stopped all contact over a month ago, no replies to his messages or emails, however - have only seen him a handfull of times before April. I left in February.It has been difficult as he has also said the same things over and over to me,how good he is doing, how I am the only one, how he loves me and how he will never stop fighting for me.

Your friend is doing exactly that .. being a friend. And she knows what you went through she saw it from the outside. She obviously cares about you alot. I know that if it wasnt for my friends and family, I may not be here now.

I came to a desision myself that I love him and always love him, however there is so much more that goes with love, that is respect , dignity and trust. One thing that always scares me is what if..... If he did stay clean and relapse later....what would I do then.... what if I had children with this person.... I know it sounds horrible, however I keep a list of the wrong doings in my head to remind myself, not little things but things that broke trust, respect and dignity. Then there are times that I can only run through messages and emails, photos and remind myself off the good times.

What I do know though .. is that I still have my dream of what I want out of a relationship and unfortuntaly he isnt the one going to make my dreams come true. This is something he has been struggling with way longer than I have been told and I feel so guilty that I am so negative towards all the "changes" however that is my gutt telling me that I have trusted before and been hurt badly by what he has chosen to do.

At the end of the day it is a personal choice that we all make, and none is wrong and none is right, it is dependant on an individual.

I hope that this helps in some sort of way.


Posts: 1706
Joined: August 22, 2005


Posted: July 4, 2013, 6:06 PM
I've always asked one simple question.

Does he make my life better?

Take the addiction out of the equation we have people in our lives, friends and lovers to make our lives better, if they don't, if they actually make them worse then they are not good for you.

Don't ever have him back because you love him, it's not enough.

Get on with your life enjoy and embrace it and if he's meant to be a part of it, a part that enriches it then it will play out that way. But for now only look forwards not back.


--------------------
[COLOR=blue]

Stay Strong

post replypost new topic