| < prev | post replypost new topic |
Posts: 22
Joined: February 5, 2015
Posted: February 21, 2015, 6:05 AM
Day 6 no H day 4 no sub
Maybe on a pink cloud but not sure. Feeling prity good and im optimistic. Love not hurting every morning its the best feeling !!! Dont ever think you cant change your life for the better. You can change you just have to want it more than breathing and especially sleeping, cause im barely sleeping as it is. Gonna take hot shower then try and rest. If anyones reading this please post feeling little lonely on this thred | ||
Posts: 674
Joined: August 17, 2014
Posted: February 21, 2015, 2:26 PM
Hi NOnchal - well done on 6 and 4 days- you should be proud- be careful of the pink cloud- we can all fall into that trap thinking we have beaten this disease - you gotta stay vigilant- its a marathon not a sprint - dont worry on the sleep front - thats normal - your sleep pattern will return- may take a while- be patient- the more you worry about it the longer it will take to come back- stay strong- remember you are not alone in your battle - we are all in the same boat- stay strong- one day at a time- best of luck -
| ||
|
Posts: 22
Joined: February 5, 2015
Posted: February 21, 2015, 10:43 PM
7 days no h 5 days no sub !!! One day at a time. Thanks for the post traveling man :)
Feels good to have support. Feel like everyday is a new chance to prove to myself how hard i have to work in order to life the way I want. Ill be returning to work in couple of days and im hopeing I can function and not look like a tired depressed maniac. Haha Been staying busy and getting stronger so i hope its enough. Sleeping 3 to 4 hours a night and exhausted threwout the day. I feel like im no fun anymore to be around. Im trying to be myself but i dont feel like myself i feel empty and lost. If i stay on the recovery path i will find my way again once more. Lifes a b**** but ya cant live without her .. | ||
Posts: 42
Joined: February 22, 2015
Posted: February 22, 2015, 3:09 AM
How are you holding up???
| ||
|
Posts: 22
Joined: February 5, 2015
Posted: February 24, 2015, 4:23 AM
10 days no h 8 days no sub
Tired as all hell motivated mentally just phisically exhausted . Feel good about myself just tired. Like the kinda tired thatsvmaking doing day to day tasks seem like hugs challenges .. gonna sleep, sleep has gotten better | ||
Posts: 1
Joined: February 26, 2015
Posted: February 26, 2015, 12:39 PM
Just scared to go thru the withdrawal process of suboxone because I have no help with my 3 kids and they are too young to take care of me or themselves. Been on 1-2mg once daily of suboxone film for over a year and sometimes skip a day just to see if I can do it but my anxiety and depression overwhelms me. (I have anxiety & depression issues anyway). I have read about the Thomas Recipe and thinking of trying it. I do not have a single person to confide in or rely on so that is why I am here. I know nobody who has dealt or is dealing with this because I have either cut ties with fellow users of the past or they have overdosed and...yeah are dead. I just do not like the idea of taking anything on a regular bases because I am not fully in control. I am on what I consider a low dose but yet once I approach my last film I go into a small panic and once again the anxiety and depression consumes me. I also feel guilty spending the money going to the clinic to get my prescription because with no other type of financial support from my ex husband that money should be used on my kids. I also worry that the clinic will realize I am not in compliance to their dosage recommendation, even though I take ALOT less, and kick me out. (1 visit a year supports my habit with the dosage I am on) Maybe I just need some encouragement or maybe I need to admit myself into a recovery in-house center, out patient would never work because I would not stick to it. I don't know what to do but the main concern is what will happen to my kids in the process...who will cook, clean, play with them? No family or friends to depend on just me and my kiddos and you would think that would be enough to motivate me to stop the small dosage I take but when the anxiety kicks in I freeze and cant be mommy. I have been on anti depressants and anti anxiety medicine in the past and I absolutely hated how they made me feel and never want to go on those again, plus withdrawal from those gave me brain shakes and violent outbursts and I am surprised I never went to jail with the temper the withdrawals from the antidepressants and anti anxiety meds gave me. I had no boundaries or inhibitions ON those meds...I did really crazy dangerous things and I do not do things like that on the 1-2mg suboxone dosage. It is like a catch 22 the small dosage gives me the energy I need to work long hours and still come home and be mommy but I would love to find that in something other than suboxone. I have started Yoga and meditation but when the anxiety and depression takes hold I am useless. Any sincere suggestions would be appreciated.
This post has been edited by LUV2bCLN on February 26, 2015, 3:34 PM | ||
|
Posted: February 28, 2015, 7:35 PM
Hey there, im glad to find a site where people are talking specifically about cleaning up off of subs, Ive been using it IV for a long time - as in years, and although i did get fully cleaned up 3 times im currently back at it again.
In the beginning I thought the stuff was magic, but just like all the other drugs, after about 4 months i started needing more. Heres the thing - there is no easy way to stop...we all know that, and im so used to being numb, that when the withdrawls or even the feelings start happening, it comes as a shock and I keep on thinking that it should`nt be that way. Both my sister and I are addicts, when she got clean her sponsor had to actually sit down and explain to her that life aint about feeling good all the time. Its time for me to stop, and I know that from past experience and present that stopping subs is scary, and that i may as well accept that Im gonna be feeling physically and mentally bad for quite a while, but over time it will get better. I personally need support, I am letting my doctor who is propperly informed control the reductions There are going to be alot of times where all i can do is sleep or at least try, but i need to push myself to get out there and keep busy, do things and let my mind realise that i can do all the things i need to without being on stuff. I know these are silly things but just basic stuff - drinking lots of water, taking a walk, avoiding coffee etc, eating right, vitamins - they all help, but honestly I am scared, guess cause it feels like im alone in this...but i aint. Just wanna experience life free of drugs, and give myself a chance. Well done for u guys who are trying and doing it, its encouraging to me and you should feel proud. | ||
|
Posted: March 3, 2015, 4:59 PM
I have used subs after 20 year opiate addiction, I was going to taper off and be done with it!! 6 years later, im still on subs, tried many times to kick them cold turkey, but all 4 attempts failed! The last time was the longest period without any drugs, and after 12 days I couldn't take it anymore! It seemed to have been a crazy assistance roller coaster ride! Many highs and lows, but days 2-8 were horrific! No sleep, skin crawling, to this I wanna add!!!! IT CAN BE DONE!! Hang in there! I have seen a few people I know come off of them, Brother, Dont spend the next 20+ years trying to figure out how to come off!! Minexperience was bad(and after 12 days I caved and am back on subs, but I think it is in part due to my numerous years being medicated! I will try and get down to 1/2 sub for 1 month then to 1/4 1 month then 1/8 for 2 weeks, and IL, try once more!!!!
| ||
|
Posted: March 3, 2015, 5:12 PM
One more thing I wanna add!! As far as me, it seemed to help ease muscle pain when I soaked in hot bath! It usually last a good 30 mins, which when going through hell, 30 mins of somewhat easement of muscle pain , its all I looked forward to! I have red articles on kicking subs and some offer different suggestions but only hot bath worked for me!! I hope I did not disappoint you with my first post, but I wanted you to just know that the longer your on them, the harder it is to break free! I look forward to seeing your next post saying your doing better than the day before, and finally that you are FREE!!
Your Brother In Life , | ||
|
Posts: 22
Joined: February 5, 2015
Posted: March 14, 2015, 9:22 AM
Been a month now havent posted ive been too busy working and saving up to get my little 1 bedroom studio apartment. Recently been living here and there in car and at shelter. Ive been clean for over 30 days from heroin and suboxone. Hate those damn opiates they were the hardest thing ive ever kicked. Feeling super proud of myself im a functioning member of society now and i dont wake up hurting everyday its the greatest gift ive ever. However i oped to use some clear, chris, dope, ice, s*** whatever you wanna call it. The last 7 days to be able to function at work. I know some of you will think thats a terrible idea, but i figure that with my low dopamin levels and lack of energy 1 hit in the morning to help me work isnt a bad idea. I grew up in a surf comunity and 1 hit of clear is kinda a way of life for alot of people . It gets a bad stigmatism because of those who abuse it. For example i eat sleep and drink water regularly while useing. If you need to kick an opiate addiction and youve used it before i say it makes the jump 60% better. Still will have depression and anxiety for awhile but i have no opiate addiction and i can function and provide for myself and not starve id say im blessed for being given a new life. I Have no problems quiting chris personaly dislike thw sunken eyes and mental and phisical toll it takes on you.
| ||
|
| post replypost new topic |