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Posts: 1059
Joined: August 29, 2011
Posted: December 7, 2013, 6:01 PM
Well, it is getting closer to Christmas and the end of 2013. It doesn't seem that my biological siblings have decided to make contact with me. I was hoping they would, but I havent known for 60 years anything about them ,why would it be a big deal and bother me now?? I'd be happy with a picture. One stinking picture! Just to see who I resemble, my dad, my mom? Do I look like my sisters??
I am sorry they lived a hard life, who among us has had a perfect,ideal life? No one I know. Certainly not me. In fact I am quite sure I went thru more things in my life then they did. But they wont even give me a chance. Oh well, such is life. I hope they have a very Merry Christmas and a warm and Happy New Year. Thanks for the kind words Girl, they are indeed appreciated. granny boy, I sound a little angry, dont I? This post has been edited by Granny2 3 on December 7, 2013, 6:02 PM -------------------- I NEVER KNEW HOW MUCH LOVE MY HEART COULD HOLD UNTIL SOMEONE CALLED ME GRANDMA. STOP AND LISTEN TO THE BIRDS SINGING IN THE TREES. WHEN THE BIRDS ARE SINGING EVERYTHING IN LIFE IS OK.[FONT=Courier][FONT=Arial] | ||
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Posts: 1059
Joined: August 29, 2011
Posted: January 7, 2014, 11:38 PM
Well, the new year is here and gone and I haven't heard a word from my 3 biological sisters and brother. I guess they decided they don't want to meet me so,hey it's their loss right?? They said they lived a very hard life? Well,mine was no cake walk, so what??
I have lived my entire life without knowing them so I guess I will just wait til I pass to the big beyond, then we will meet. Too bad for them. -------------------- I NEVER KNEW HOW MUCH LOVE MY HEART COULD HOLD UNTIL SOMEONE CALLED ME GRANDMA. STOP AND LISTEN TO THE BIRDS SINGING IN THE TREES. WHEN THE BIRDS ARE SINGING EVERYTHING IN LIFE IS OK.[FONT=Courier][FONT=Arial] | ||
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Posted: June 7, 2014, 8:20 PM
Granny23 - Hi there... I have waited awhile to write this because I am concerned if it is appropriate. But if you are interested, I can tell you about my adoption experience (I was born in CA and placed for adoption). I found my birth parents on my own and it has been quite the life experience.
FULL DISCLOSURE: I am not an addict - I have experience with family members, friends, etc. I don't want to say anything inappropriate but if you want to hear my story, I would be glad to email you. Best wishes, T | ||
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Posts: 1059
Joined: August 29, 2011
Posted: June 23, 2014, 11:16 PM
add2minus1,
how nice of you to want to share your experience with me. Its been a full year and social services has not called me to say my siblings have changed their minds about wanting to see me. I sent in my DNA to Ancestry.com a few months ago and they found one 2nd-3rd cousin and one 3rd-4th cousin and a lot of possible cousins after that but so far I cant seem to get any response from either of them. really weird. Since my sibs don't want contact I was hoping to go around behind their backs without disrespecting their wishes. I am still waiting on the cousins to answer me. Waiting is nothing new, I didn't know I was adopted until about 9-10 yrs ago now. It took me another few years to even start to look. I cant miss what I never had right? Granny -------------------- I NEVER KNEW HOW MUCH LOVE MY HEART COULD HOLD UNTIL SOMEONE CALLED ME GRANDMA. STOP AND LISTEN TO THE BIRDS SINGING IN THE TREES. WHEN THE BIRDS ARE SINGING EVERYTHING IN LIFE IS OK.[FONT=Courier][FONT=Arial] | ||
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Posted: July 9, 2014, 1:02 AM
Granny - I just found your reply! Had a rough month with a "sissy injury" so I haven't been online a lot, but I am glad your reply.
IMO - We CAN miss what we never had - there is an unique situation to those of us who are adopted. We miss being told we "look like so and so" / we miss being told we have the same character traits of a special relative / we miss looking into the faces of our loved ones and not seeing ourselves. We may feel loved but there is something essential but never quite feeling like "we belong". We miss a TRUE sense of connection to our family members because our society /world make us feel marginalized because we are different. And forever feeling like we will always be different (because we are not "blood related") leaves a hole / mark in our hearts. If you are up for emailing, I would be willing to share my experience about siblings / cousins who deny us the opportunity to simply meet up in person. I admire your courage and strength and would welcome speaking further with you/ My email: add2minus1@gmail.com | ||
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Posts: 1059
Joined: August 29, 2011
Posted: August 19, 2014, 10:41 PM
add2minus1,
I think its funny you say we miss being told we look like so and so or someone in the family used to do "that" just like you. One thing that always stood out with me was the fact that one of my cousins was born the same year I was, me in June, he in August, which meant my mom (the older of 3 girls) and her younger sister would have been pregnant at the same time. I thought that would have been kinda cool. But whenever I brought it up the subject got changed or people would leave the room. I thought it was weird, it just added to my suspicions. It has been over a year, June 2013, since I talked to social services and she told me my 3 bio siblings didn't think they wanted contact, so oh well. I cant force them. As I think I mentioned, I am still trying to discreetly go around them by doing the DNA test and asking on ancestry.com with help from 2nd,3rd or 4th cousins. Not too much luck yet. I have come to the conclusion that, from the info my parents left for me with my adoption file that I take more after my dad because I am tall and my dad was, 5' 8.5", I have dark brown hair, as did my dad, and I have blue eyes, like my dad and we were both skinny as all get out, me at 105Lbs and him at 123lbs. Now my nose? Don't know who had that. My mom was short, 5'6", blond hair, blue eyes,130 lbs. I appreciate your offer and I will keep it in mind, I may just need it. No one who isn't adopted gets it, ya know? Everything is on hold for me at the moment because I am dealing with some family stuff. Thanks so much. granny -------------------- I NEVER KNEW HOW MUCH LOVE MY HEART COULD HOLD UNTIL SOMEONE CALLED ME GRANDMA. STOP AND LISTEN TO THE BIRDS SINGING IN THE TREES. WHEN THE BIRDS ARE SINGING EVERYTHING IN LIFE IS OK.[FONT=Courier][FONT=Arial] | ||
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Posted: October 21, 2014, 4:15 AM
Did you ever find any siblings? I'm iso of 4 older siblings in NY. I was born in 1966 and notice everyone is looking for "Older Siblings" No one seems to be looking younger ones (me lol) In my case they claim my natural mother died in early 1967 so ....I still could have younger half siblings. I'm going to register on DNA registries soon. I think that is the only options for those of us searching especially in NY and other sealed record states.
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Posts: 1059
Joined: August 29, 2011
Posted: November 23, 2014, 7:27 PM
No, I have not heard from any of my biological siblings. They obviously decided they don't want to meet me. I also haven't had any luck from Ancestry.com either. I really don't want to step on anyone's toes and I cant see how just a photo of my bio parents would hurt. I cant identify who they are by a photo. Its like my last ditch attempt to connect to a blood relative.
I have just let it go pretty much as far as my family tree goes, I have run into the last brick wall and have come to the end of my journey. I went through most of my 61 years not even knowing I was adopted (my siblings don't know that part) so I never knew what I had lost. I have a great adoptive family (and both parents are gone now) with aunts and cousins and the like that love me so I am happy with that. thanks for the thought, granny -------------------- I NEVER KNEW HOW MUCH LOVE MY HEART COULD HOLD UNTIL SOMEONE CALLED ME GRANDMA. STOP AND LISTEN TO THE BIRDS SINGING IN THE TREES. WHEN THE BIRDS ARE SINGING EVERYTHING IN LIFE IS OK.[FONT=Courier][FONT=Arial] | ||
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Posts: 1059
Joined: August 29, 2011
Posted: January 8, 2015, 8:00 PM
I finally cancelled the $19.99 a month that Ancestry.com charges to have access to a whole ton of stuff to find family members. I don't have any names or anything so I keep running into dead ends.
My adopted family has an open account I can use with that part of my family, but I have basically given up on ever finding anything about my biological family. Because they don't want to and I never wanted to interfere in or with their lives , it would just be cool to see a family picture to see how I "fit" into the whole scheme of things on this planet but they don't seem to want to help and it is their decision to make. Maybe the one 2nd cousin Ancestry found will finally decide to help me but so far they haven't answered any of my communications. Its been over a year. -------------------- I NEVER KNEW HOW MUCH LOVE MY HEART COULD HOLD UNTIL SOMEONE CALLED ME GRANDMA. STOP AND LISTEN TO THE BIRDS SINGING IN THE TREES. WHEN THE BIRDS ARE SINGING EVERYTHING IN LIFE IS OK.[FONT=Courier][FONT=Arial] | ||
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Posts: 1059
Joined: August 29, 2011
Posted: May 21, 2015, 7:07 PM
I was on facebook a while back and I got this request to "friend" this guy ,so I did. Wondered why he asked me...seems we are "distantly related". I thought there might be a slight chance he was my bio brother, he's in a wheelchair.....my brother has cerebral palsy, he's older than me...I told him my story and he suggested I not give up and keep looking, but so far it hasn't gone much further..
-------------------- I NEVER KNEW HOW MUCH LOVE MY HEART COULD HOLD UNTIL SOMEONE CALLED ME GRANDMA. STOP AND LISTEN TO THE BIRDS SINGING IN THE TREES. WHEN THE BIRDS ARE SINGING EVERYTHING IN LIFE IS OK.[FONT=Courier][FONT=Arial] | ||
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