Posted: February 18, 2015, 2:06 PM
Hi. My name is Chris. I wouldn't even have been able to sit up straight enough to type this yesterday, and it prob would have been incoherent. Anyways, in an effort to help someone out there, let me tell my story. My experience with opiates started mundance enough after a couple surgeries back in 04, enjoyed the sensation and how productive and confident it made me feel, and then graduated to oxycontins, morphine sulphate, china white (so cal available), and fentanyl patches and those wonderful loli-pops (lol...how they justify those I'll never quite get)! Anyways, the problem evolved quickly becasue I had a good business clearing land with heavy machinery and the jobs were rather well paying. Money makes a bad habit, a terribly dangerous one. After several years, of this by around 2008, I was wiped out and felt my tolerance was going to kill me one night in my sleep. I tapperd a litle, and sat around in a chair in my garage for two months, losing 20-30lbs, mainly muscle i'm sure.Depression and absolutely horrible lower back pain was relentless. After a couple months, a friend suggested suboxone. I foudn a great doctor, a dr. Stillion in cali. and he took great care in helping me through the induction process. Within a day or two, I was my old self again and for three or 4 years got married, had two beautiful little babies and all was good. Then losst my insurance and due to some hardships with my daughter needing three heart surgeries, I went to the methadone clinic in PA. My wife hated the mood swings she claimed I had and the stigma of me going to a clinic was too much for her and my family to swallow. Once again made the switch back to suboxone after getting ins in PA. but made the switch far too quickly and went into the most wild, painful, psychotic precipitated withdrawals one could imagine. Bed was soaken wet, bucket for crapping and throwing up in next to th e bed becasuse at times I wouldn't even make it 15 to the toilet. Horrible, and I felt so alone in misery. Two to three days later the suboxone started to take the spots in the synampses of my brain and I started to get some life back into me.
Fast forward, what, four years now, I've been on 100 mg of methadone for almost two years now and was very complacent with this for quite soem time, and would even defend the benefit to myself quite ferociously to anyone who would question what I was doing. My brain doesnt produce neurotransmitters like dopamine and such, and I know this is what creates my intense affinity for opiates. Divorced earlier in the year, an injuction placed on me by my exes boyfriend who didn't like I would help the kids with homework at the house, i know have reached a terrible low. I have my 4 and 5 year olds every weekend, thank god, but I have been ----growing increasingly disappointing at the methadone's diminishing effectiveness . To get to the point, because i'm gettign wiped out here, last friday was my last 100mg methadone dose, in which i took my take home dose as well--like an idiot figuring I'd better get rid of it so I don't try to take it later when feeling s***ty. The doctor for suboxone gave me 50 of the 10/350 norocos, all of which were gone by monday night. tues went and got my first suboxone dose, took a half 8mg strip later that morning and a diazepam to help with any discomfort, and sure enoguh, I didn't get any relief; instead Ive been aching and moaning in been in bed ever since Be careful not to take suboxone too soon after methadone, especially a rather high dosage like myself.