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Posted: July 24, 2015, 6:50 AM
I have been married less than 5 years. We have a 4 year old. I knew he had a past using but when we started dating he stopped, got rid of old friends and got a great job. Within the past 2 years I've watched it all fall apart. He lost His job, stopped being home, and began hanging with the old "friends". There were nights he didn't come home- other times up til 3-4 am. I knew he was using but he convinced me it was pills not meth. I guess I tried to believe him- i don't know why- in hopes he would stop- keep our family together maybe? I've since found out that the pills were a lie. I've heard he was unfaithful (not sure if that's true)- I never thought he would cheat. He holds it together for a few days but then will be out late and up all night. He just got a new job and is begging for one last chance (I've given a million). I guess I need reassurance that even as a not daily user- he has and never will quit permanently without serious help. I know leaving is the right thing to do and I have support but I still worry about him and I start questioning breaking up my family. But I am afraid for my daughter and Her future. I guess I just need strength to know that walking away is the right thing to do. He promises to get help then backs out. I'm so new to this- but I have been living a hellish roller coaster for 2 years. All trust has gone. He lies, steals and can be horribly verbally nasty (not physically). But then he pleads and my heart breaks. I'm sorry this is all over the place- that's how I feel.
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Posted: July 28, 2015, 7:46 AM
Hey Needstrength. Yeah i totally can relate to your story. I have a almost turning 3yr.old daughter and wife who went through the same thing you are going through. I know it must be really tough. Its a good thing you are trying to seek for answers and are seeking help and support by coming on here. Actually the first time i came on here i was still using heavily. But i knew i wanted to quit. I went to rehab for one year. After 1 month of finding this site. Hang in there Needstrengh it is a hard decision to decide to get help on your husbands part. It takes your push and support as well. If you cannot find a center for him to enter for whatever reason, definitely suggest narcotics anonymous as a starting ground for the both of you. If he is not interested, it may be a good idea to go first to help you cope, but keep trying to help him to take a step towards wanting to get help. And if after failed attempts at this and no progress. Keep praying for another plan thats best for you. My wife never gave up on me and thats the reason why im so grateful for her being so tough on me last year. She pushed me to go to rehab. I started last may 2014 and finished may 2015. It was the hardest thing ive ever been thru in my life even more than graduating bachelors in nursing. Hes gotta really want it as well. What makes me think that u guys have a chance to pull thru is the fact that he said he wanted to get help but backs out. Ive done the same exact think 100 times before i finally wad fed up and let go of my pride. This is my first tome posting here. Im all over the place as well so dont feel so bad lol. Rehab in the states is expensive. I got help abroad currently living abroad as well with my wife and daughter. Is it possible your husband can join a rehab where your from?
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