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Posts: 1
Joined: April 10, 2015
Posted: April 10, 2015, 3:47 AM
I have a 21-year old son who has struggled with various forms of substance abuse for a couple of years. We let him move home after an accident left him in a lot of pain. We thought we could give him a fresh start and, a year later when his drug use and irresponsibility got worse, we made him leave. This was a few weeks ago. Now that he's alienated all his friends and family and has zero money and no place to stay, he's reached critical mass--meaning he's totally despondent, hopeless, and suicidal.
He has officially "hit rock bottom" (in my opinion, anyways) but doesn't seem any closer to admitting that he and the drugs are responsible for his miserable life. In fact, he has taken zero responsibility for any adverse events in his life (traffic tickets, loss of job, failure to get through a single semester he begins in college, a recent arrest for possession, and getting kicked out of our home.) This is the same kid who got a job at 14 and saved up enough for a car by 16--who cared for others more than himself--who had tons of wholesome friends and acted with caution and responsibility...and who was always respectful and honest. Drugs have taken these things away one by one by one. It's sickening to watch--and even more sickening to hear him blame it all on everyone and everything else. But I digress...my real question is: Is threatening suicide common for addicts? I feel like I'm watching a train wreck and I'm immobilized--he's put us through such a huge amount of chaos for so long, I'm at the "can't take any more" phase, and now that he's out of the house and I have the chance to recover, his threats of suicide are increasing. I've heard to take all threats of suicide seriously, so I know I should act. But he's a legal adult and refuses to be taken to a hospital or rehab. I have several texts from him that mention suicide. Is there a way for me to get him admitted? If he's truly suicidal, does he need to be in a psychiatric hospital or rehab? He's been quite delusional and psychotic at times, and I wanted to get him evaluated (by a real doctor--not the one he goes to for the Adderall and Xanax), but he refuses to go, refuses therapy, refuses to take antidepressants (even though he's supposed to be taking Zoloft for depression and anxiety). He says he knows more about psychology than psychologists. He's such a huge, stubborn pain in the butt! What should my role be at this point? How should I deal with the suicidal behavior? If anyone has any advice, I would REALLY appreciate it. | ||
Posts: 674
Joined: August 17, 2014
Posted: April 10, 2015, 1:30 PM
Hi Momlisa, addicts love drama and being the centre of attention, you are not responsible for your sons addiction, he has refused all the help you have offered, this is his choice, he needs to realise that all his actions have consequences. you need to take care of you, look up your local Narcotics Anonymous they have a group for family's of addicts- there you will meet other parents with similar concerns. they will welcome you, as for your son until he decides he wants to quit, nothing will change- i dont know where you are in the world, here you could have him sectioned- but that is only a temporary solution- he has to decide to reach out for help- you said he was in rehab before- it doesent work unless you want to get clean/sober really badly. All these decisions are down to him-you cannot fix him so concentrate on taking care of you- all you can do is hope that your son hits his "rock bottom" and reaches out for help- best of luck
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