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Posts: 5
Joined: August 19, 2012
Posted: August 19, 2012, 3:19 PM
I had no idea Tramadol dependency/addiction was such a RAMPID thing until i began to do some research based upon my own problems I was experiencing.....My story just about parallel to everyone else who became hooked on "the little white pill!" Placed on it for a shoulder injury/pain then surgery 3-4 mo's later - that was 2009. I have tried 2-3 times since to get away from these things & have never gotten very far. I always end up so very ill that i go back to them. This time has to be different - in some ways it already is. My hubby began to put some things together & confronted me 6 wks ago - I broke down & ended the madness. He has been the most supportive, understanding, "were in this together & we will do whatever we need to do to find an end to this" man ever. I don't deserve this kind of forgiveness based upon my antics since 2009 - but i have it unconditionally! I've never been strong enough to taper correctly - maybe i wasn't doing it right. I've now read how it should be done. We've checked into seeing a Drug addiction physician vs. a reg. MD & have found out that not only is the cost estronomical (no one files this ins.-cash upfront) but meds like Subtex & Suboxone are far beyond (and more serious) than is used to treat Tramadol addiction. Further research has also verified that. I have seen alot about Clonidin (sp?) being used to combat symptoms/withdrawals & have read alot about "Withdrawal Ease" non RX med available. I am currently in the process of deciding which way to go here - see a drug addiction dr (feeling very guilty about the $$ expense) or trying on my own to do an effective taper w/the use of either Clonodine, WD Ease - or both. I have support now i didn't have before. i cannot explain to you about my severity w/these WD issues & my inability to function for wks - no sleep for nites on end w/a job where i must be "on my game" 9 hrs a day/5 days a week. I have no "time off" avail w/my job @ present & we are in agreement under no uncertain terms can i loose my job - it pays very well & I carry my family's benefits 100% - it took me years to get where i am. So I have got to choose what is going to work for me w/ the least possible life "interruptions" I am very distressed anticipating either way i go. I feel like i am never going to be happy, feel good or be the same again. This med has not caused me huge issues by it's abuse - i have functioned @ 100% for 3 yrs despite & my life is good.but the expense is not fair to my family & i know nothing good can come of this continued usage. I 'm 45,happily married x 26 yrs and have 2 teen-age boys. I have worked my way up to anywhere from 18-24 50 mg pills a day over the last 3 yrs. Any insight would be appreciated while i am in the process of making decisions about what path is right for me to take @ this point. I have to do it this time.
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Posts: 133
Joined: August 10, 2012
Posted: August 19, 2012, 3:56 PM
I can't believe that it would not be possible to do this on your own, but then, although I took Tramadol for a while years ago, it never did anything for me so I just quit.
I know someone who may have an Idea; I'll see if I can get here on here. | ||
Posts: 76
Joined: August 14, 2012
Posted: August 19, 2012, 5:01 PM
I took Tramadol and it didn't even feel like I took anything, so I just quit taken them. I didn't know that they could be apddicted. Hope you find some help. Good luck!!!
-------------------- Don’t let the fear of failure stop you from trying! | ||
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Posts: 5
Joined: August 19, 2012
Posted: August 19, 2012, 5:50 PM
Thank you Guiyana: I would really love to hear from someone who has been where i am & how they conquered this ferocious stuff that has it's grip on you before you even know it! Anyone that's a few steps ahead of me that could offer up what path they chose, what they did, how they did it, etc. All responses are appreciated except those who tell me tram is not addictive (wanna bet?? And no - i am not referring to the other response above in any way) or those that are gonna tell me that tram wd's are "no big deal" (you have no clue!!LOL) I am someone who prior to 2009 never took any meds of any sort - much less pain pills! Went thru a full hystorectomy w/out so much as even getting the Rx filled! Back in the days when all my peeps were smoking pot in high school, drinking beer, etc - i never even wanted to do those things so i didn't! (i am just trying to illustrate here that i've never been one to seek out a "high" just for the hell of it. LOL) thanks~
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Posts: 76
Joined: August 14, 2012
Posted: August 19, 2012, 6:00 PM
hi lasdds,
I'm not sure about tramadol, but I can assure you I do know about addiction. I am battling one myself and I must admit that it is the HARDEST thing I ever had to go through. If I would have known I would be going through this today, I would have never swallowed the first pain pill. I have started attending NA meetings and they seem to help. Although after only been clean for 4 days, I slipped, but tomorrow is a new day and I will try again. I will not give up until I have this beat! I really wish you the best in this and I will add you to my prayer list. Good luck and God Bless!!!!! -------------------- Don’t let the fear of failure stop you from trying! | ||
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Posts: 133
Joined: August 10, 2012
Posted: August 19, 2012, 6:58 PM
Actually lasdds, I DO know they are addictive. I think my body was just conditioned by stronger stuff so Tramadol didn't help or give me a "high".
You might try a community (if they still have it) on drugs.com. At the site "community" is on the bar below the logo, then you go to "forums". It is a huge site with, as I remember, lots of threads on Tramadol addiction. You can read, I believe, without signing up. | ||
Posts: 7
Joined: August 19, 2012
Posted: August 19, 2012, 10:41 PM
Yes, some folks can and do become addicted to Tramadol without realizing it. It is somewhere in the fine print of the material the pharmacy gives us every time we get a refill. Buried way deep inside the fine print.
You really, if possible do not want to use another drug to get off of this one. However, if you are 'up for it' you can 'TAPER' on your own. It will be slow, but you can do it. See how many a day you are taking. Decrease that dose by 1 pill and 1 pill only for 1 week. Then the 2nd week you can decrease by another pill. Now when you decrease by the 1 pill. Spread the remaining pills evenly over the 24 hour period. By doing this one week at a time, your body readjusts to 1 less pill in a 24 hour period. BTW anything over 8 pills a day is over their RECOMMENDED DOSAGE. Example: IF you are taking 15 pills a day, the first week you will only take 14 pills a day. Those 14 pills will be divided as equally as possible over the 24 hours. Second week you will only take 13 pills a day. etc What this does, is allow your body to compensate, without hardly any or no discomfort. The 'trick' is to STAY WITH IT. Be consistent. Don't stop. Continue the taper week by week. Yes, it will take TIME, but will be a lot easier and less expensive for you than going to an addiction doctor and buying the very expensive, also addictive medications the 'addiction dr will want to give you. Just my humble opinion. Love and hugs, This post has been edited by laurie6781 on August 19, 2012, 10:45 PM -------------------- Laurie | ||
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Posted: August 19, 2012, 11:19 PM
I'm posting this video for the 5th time today! -------------------- “Beliefs are big on earth. People collect them. Some of these beliefs are helpful but others just keep you running around, following rules that others have laid down. They don’t have a lot of personal meaning. It’s a good idea to sort through your beliefs now and then and throw out the ones that don’t serve you.” ~ The Afterlife of Billy Fingers | ||
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Posts: 5
Joined: August 19, 2012
Posted: August 20, 2012, 12:35 AM
Thanks so much - i will watch the video, too! Can you share more about how your son went about coming off this stuff? (i.e. method, length of time, etc) & he used nothing in the way of medical intervention/Rx's to combat w/d's, help him get some sleep, etc??? I know your experience will be really useful to me as i begin this journey back home! :)
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Posted: August 20, 2012, 3:08 AM
Mostly, he got the luck of the draw, of getting me as his mother. There was no freaking way I was going to lose a kid to drugs. I knew there was a real fix and I hunted it down. Nutrition just made the most sense. Really what else does a body need, besides the obvious things; real nutrition, clean water, sleep, exercise, fresh air and sunshine? Certainly it isn’t deficient in Suboxone or Methadone or Psych Drugs for depression or meetings or whatever else is out there. -------------------- “Beliefs are big on earth. People collect them. Some of these beliefs are helpful but others just keep you running around, following rules that others have laid down. They don’t have a lot of personal meaning. It’s a good idea to sort through your beliefs now and then and throw out the ones that don’t serve you.” ~ The Afterlife of Billy Fingers | ||
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Posts: 133
Joined: August 10, 2012
Posted: August 20, 2012, 7:18 AM
My best advice? Follow Laurie's program. I know her, she knows her stuff and we will hang in there with you. Get your husband on board, write out your plan, and stick to it.
Those sub Drs. make waayy too much money in my opinion and while I think it has a place with heavily addicted people (if they find a good doctor) I know too many people who get on subs and are on them for years to the tune of $$$$$$$$, and then have to go through withdrawal from that. Listen to Laurie, and I will be here in the bleachers rooting for you! Many hugs, Giyana | ||
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Posted: August 20, 2012, 10:35 AM
I think tapering is fine too. There is an Amino Acid I posted about in a couple other threads, that should help you do that faster. -------------------- “Beliefs are big on earth. People collect them. Some of these beliefs are helpful but others just keep you running around, following rules that others have laid down. They don’t have a lot of personal meaning. It’s a good idea to sort through your beliefs now and then and throw out the ones that don’t serve you.” ~ The Afterlife of Billy Fingers | ||
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Posts: 183
Joined: December 22, 2011
Posted: August 20, 2012, 1:35 PM
I had some addiction problems with Tramadol. I used them for a cheap high when I couldn't afford the bigger stuff. I am a recovering heroin/pain pill abuser for about 10+ years.
I can tell you this - the Tramadol withdraw is one of the worst I've experienced. Reason - ANXIETY. The anxiety from this particular withdraw is horrendous. You want to crawl out of your skin and up the walls. I've been there my friend, it's not fun. (((((hugs))))) I remember watching movies trying to come off of that and I was so sick and anxious I couldn't stand it. I've withdrawn over the years from many different types of opiates. Tramadol is a synthetic opiate and is very dangerous in my opinion. It causes seizures and messes with the brain. I remember once I was actually unable to urinate. I had to but could not push it out. I was pretty scared. Also, the constipation sucks just as if you were on painkillers. You know when someone tells you that you are a "full of sh it?" - well, opiate addicts usually are. Literally. Lol. I had an X-ray done at a Med Express one time where all the docs were staring at it in surprise. I was literally sick from not being able to go. Finally, I drank 2 bottles of some digusting lemon stuff and spent about 24 hours parked in front my bathroom. If you take enough Tramadol, the high reminds me a bit of acid "trippin". It's bizzare and makes you dizzy and if you are driving on it, you should NOT be. You can seize out from this stuff...especially the high doses you are on!! The most I ever took at once were 8 pills and then maybe an hour later, 3 more and so on. My ex, I've seen him take 15-20 at a time. VERY dangerous. He ended up having a Grand Mal Seizure and dropping his child. Thankfully, she was not hurt but that finally scared the crap out him. I'm away from him and have been for quite a while. My Tramadol dabbling habit ended when things ended with him. Those things are easy to get too. I spent $$$ thousands $$$ buying them online and having them Federal Expressed to my house, or my job..wherever I happened to be. I seriously have taken 8 bags of heroin that didn't have that weird effect Tramadol did. Of course it was pretty crappy heroin..I think half of the smack I was taking was actually Morphine. Who knows these days....they cut it with lots of different things and mostly addicts are mice that are experimented on. Thankfully, I was a snorter, and never got into the needle. Anyway...Nutrition alone isn't going to kick your habit. Magik's got great advice and I think she speaks a lot of truth but you need more than just good food and exercise. Honestly, go to an addiction specialist . Pay the money. Get in therapy. If you need Subs, follow the doctor's directions to the tee. Hey, if you have insurance - USE IT. Your job won't have details about the "why" you are using your health plan. This is a disease, if you had cancer or diabetes would you hesitate to use your healthcare? NO. I'm sure you would not. Stop thinking that you are this horrible person who did all of this yourself and now should have to suffer! You don't. And yes, while you did do this to yourself, it is part of the addiction - which is part of the disease. Remember you have a disease and since you have the support of your husband, use it- you will need him. It is absolutely wonderful that he is in this with you and being so supportive. If he hasn't read up on addiction, my advice is to tell him to do so. He will be so much more understanding and supportive if he knows what he is exactly dealing with. Men love to solve problems, but this is YOUR problem to solve. Make sure he knows that. This IS about you. Your addiction, not his. You will have to do the work to see "why" you used and what is making you continue to use. Yeah, yeah...the high felt great, blah blah blah...but later on, when it doesn't feel so great you are still using it. A great shrink will help you figure out what happened or what you are running from. Why do you need a pill (or many) to keep you happy? This is the key - figuring that out. I use my health insurance and I work at a big corporations, my job is also the higher paying one in my relationship. Almost all of my relationships have been where I make more money than him. But I didn't hesitate to use my company's program. The program is very confidential and they referred me to a great specialist and now I see a therapist once a week. I am feeling better than ever and my life is what I call "healing". I'm still dealing with some scabs that need tended too (spiritually wounded) but I am at least addressing them. It hurts sometimes but it's still a good thing. I had no idea how very much pain I hold inside...until I started treatment. Plus, I pay no co-pay on at least one of my scripts per month (I get 2 weeks at a time). So, I'm paying about $18 a month for my entire month's supply. My insurance covers the rest. I'm on 8 milligrams a day. And, I'm tapering to 6 in 2 weeks. I"m excited instead of scared...I have had a long time (8 months) letting my brain heal from all the damage I did. Hey, I guarantee you have damage too. But, seeing the large doses you are on scare me for you a little bit. Be cautious...I worry you will seize. My old PCP stopped prescribing them...he had a patient (a women my age -40) who became addicted to them and began havins seizures all day long. He's still treating her and she's a mess. Her's is an extreme example but still, I swear they don't know enough about this drug..very dangerous. Be careful. Let your husband read my post if you wish to show him that you've found someone whose been through this. I'm a professional woman too, got originally addicted from surgery on my teeth and ever since I was an addict. One thing I can promise you if you work at this and get off these...there will come a wonderful day where you'll feel like "you" again. You won't be sick or tired or achey or anxious. You'll be just you and it feels amazing. This summer has been amazing for me. It's like waking up after 10 hellish years. It seems impossible. You think you'll be bored without them...trust me, you won't be. Things you forgot you were intersted in will begin to come pouring back. It's wonderful and I feel like a great gift has been given to me, and it has. I went and got it myself though. The gift of soberity is a beautiful and wonderful gift I give myself. I deserve it. And I'm telling you...so do you!! Good luck and lots and lots of (((((((((hugs)))))))))) YOU CAN DO THIS and WILL. Have faith...keep posting and never give up! Love, Melissa -------------------- "If some great catastrophe is not announced every morning, we feel a certain void. nothing in the paper today , we sigh.” Paul Valery “Self-love, is not so vile a sin as self-neglecting.” William Shakespeare "Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself." George Bernard Shaw “If we couldn't laugh, we would all go insane.” Jimmy Buffet | ||
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Posts: 133
Joined: August 10, 2012
Posted: August 20, 2012, 6:42 PM
So you got a variety of opinions here, maybe more to come. I guess I just never took enough to get high from them, or to kill the pain. One thing I am sure you need to do is talk to your physician (he/she is giving you the script for the pills?) and discuss this frankly. You need some f2f time with a medical source (hopefully one who can at least recommend a trustworthy "specialist").
Melissa makes a good point that if you have insurance, use it. Employers would rather help than have a trusted employee in trouble. Or if it is your husband's insurance, same thing. | ||
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Posts: 5
Joined: August 19, 2012
Posted: August 20, 2012, 7:31 PM
thank you ALL for your replys......
*MAJK: thanks for providing links but as far this statement: "I think tapering is fine too. There is an Amino Acid I posted about in a couple other threads, that should help you do that faster. " Can you tell me in what other threads perhaps that you'd mentioned Amino Acid - which community/discussion might that have been??? thnx My husband is def on board - and we both agree tapering is the way to go - or for me and our/my situation @ present anyway. I am scared $hitless (LOL - no pun intended indeed!!) about this whole process period. But from what i've read, the way the body reacts/adjusts to the tapering method is sort of comforting in the middle of the storm - so to speak. I am now to the next point as far as making the other decisions about klonipin and something for sleep like Lunesta - not AMBIEN - that's all i need: something else to get hung up on!! LOL I understand how/why/the way Klonipin works - and as long as i can SLEEP nightly to face the new 9-hr work day the next day - i think i can manage somehow. I guess my question now is: at what point - if you were under medical advisory during a process such as this - do you start TAKING those things if you are merely tapering? You'll just know when the wd's kick in? Or more than likely when you get down to low #/none period pills???? I can only imagine the move from even .50 to a flat nothing is def. going to be the worst.....at least i sorta know what to expect this time! LOL | ||
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Posts: 5
Joined: August 19, 2012
Posted: August 20, 2012, 7:58 PM
MelissaLynn: Thank you for all that - now i have identified w/someone who knows and can tell me what's up - when to expect perhaps - how long, to what extent, etc. I've ever tapered b4 - only ct a handful of times when i ran out - once got a "bad" batch of nothing but placebo/sugar pills the very last time i ordered overseas - went 7 days w/out and it was H3LL!!
I shared the decisions/choices on the things i have narrowed down to thus far w/my hubby last evening - he is completely on board, realizes tapering is a long method in the way of time/months and for time being i have to keep orders going as needed - but as he says "it's a step in the right direction & the only thing worse than you being on this crap for 2 yrs is for you to be on it 2 yrs. and one day." He is so correct, too! : ) Here's the deal w/the insurance: Co-incidently i work for a very LARGE and very well known US insurance company based in Little Rock, Ar - which is where we live. They do have a service but i didn't know this till today - so i am going to read and investigate more on this tomorrow during break/lunch as it is only avail on our in-house enterprise site. But - of all the calls i have made to dr's offices who treat substance abuse - DO NOT take or file insurance. You pay cash up front ev time you walk in the door and it is HEFTY!! and you also pay full price for the Rx (what ever treatment meds they propose you start) they supply and you pay full price to THEM- which SUX b/c i have $7 copay and have EXCELLENT insurance w/$10 copay and no deductable - my husband says cost doesn't matter! However i beg to differ - i have dragged him thru the poor house paying for my "fix" all these years - thus my desire to find the most effective but yet cheapest method that will work for me. I am encouraged to potentially work w/my company's behavior medicine program as well - and can't believe i didn't even consider that as an option until stumbling up on it today. I will keep you all posted. | ||
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Posted: August 20, 2012, 9:32 PM
Sure. My thread is Amino Acid Therapy for All Mental Illness’ in the Family/Partner Forum. I'll warn you in advance that you will need to do a bit of navigating to get just information- there's plenty of skepticism sandwiched between the helpful parts. -------------------- “Beliefs are big on earth. People collect them. Some of these beliefs are helpful but others just keep you running around, following rules that others have laid down. They don’t have a lot of personal meaning. It’s a good idea to sort through your beliefs now and then and throw out the ones that don’t serve you.” ~ The Afterlife of Billy Fingers | ||
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Posts: 133
Joined: August 10, 2012
Posted: August 21, 2012, 5:23 AM
Sounds like you are formulating a plan with your insurance, and I still believe you can do a taper. But see what advice you get from talking to the insurance people. I am so leary of this sub route. I know too many people who have been on it forever and then if they try to get off there is withdrawal there too. For heavy multi-substance abusers, maybe, but if I read you right it is only the Tramadol?
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Posts: 20396
Joined: February 12, 2004
Posted: August 21, 2012, 12:54 PM
Like Melissa, withdrawals from Tramadol were the worst for me. I took such high amounts..to get that high. My husband was/is addicted to it as well and started having seizures from taking too much. That's very common so be careful.
For awhile, drs loved to prescribe this because it was marketed by the drug companies as non-narcotic. While it may be non-narcotic, it is highly addictive. Especially in older people, seniors. You would spend your last dollar to get high..spend as much if not more to clean. Go to the addiction specialist, be willing, tell the truth and let them help you. Then find a meeting. NA/AA..women's meetings are best for newcomer's (women newcomers). You are very lucky to have your husband, he sounds like a lovely man, but he's not enough. You need as much face to face support as you can get. You do deserve this..don't ever say you don't. You aren't some bad person trying to get good. You're sick, trying to get well. -------------------- I used Drugs to forget, I got clean to remember. | ||
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Posts: 183
Joined: December 22, 2011
Posted: August 21, 2012, 1:44 PM
Please don't say "only Tramadol".
It diminishes it, and Tramadol is not something to fool around with. Tapering for you right now to me seems stupid, frankly. And I've been through this withdraw, several times in fact. It's horrendous and the OP is right to be concerned about her work status, etc. This is what I'd do in your (OP) scenerio. See what kind of programs your company offers for opiate addicts. That would be first. If they have one that seems good - call and talk to them...see what it's all about. It might be perfect for you. Second, I'd research until I found the best Addiction Specialist I could find. That's ridiculous that they don't take insurance but see if you can find one who will. I can't believe you are having that much trouble! That sucks! If you are on Medical Assistance, a lot of the programs around here are practically free. And same goes for the prescription. I know someone on the Medical assistance program (welfare) and he pays a total of $3 bucks for his sub script. Most of the addicts I'm in group with have jobs but there are several on medical assistance and they really don't pay anything for group or one on one (face to face) therapy. Anyway, it's all a moot point considering where you live. Move here, lol, Pittsburgh is obviously a good place for addicts in recovery. Just reading your posts I can tell that you are very much in active addiction and rationalizing and secretly trying to figure out a way to continue getting high...hoping you will from the smaller doses but knowing you won't. I just don't want to hear about you driving down the road and fading out. Because Tramadol does that when you take large doses. I'm sure you know that. Cripes, I know myself I caused no less than 2 wrecks of my own car (once I misjudged cuz I was stoned and ran into my own apartment building with my car and the other, a giant Escalade pushed me over to where I curbed my car and damaged my ground effects.) I was stoned to the gills for both of those ON TRAMADOL. Thankfully, no one got hurt and it was only my car and my pride that had damage. I was so embarrased. I don't know if you experience this, but I never got used to that awful taste that Trams left in my mouth. There was an aftertaste to them that I hated. My ex and I used to call taking Tramadol "trammin". We figured we had some great secret and found a way to semi-legally get high all the time because we could buy the pills right online. We didn't have to go to the streets to get them. I had a script, he had one, and let's see.....I can't even tell you how many names we used to get them. It was quite a bit though. I'm sure you know..you did this type of thing too. Even the online pharmacies would only provide you script for a month's worth. And some of them were connected so you couldn't try and pull a fast one and order more from another site. So, I learned my way around all of that, and I know you probably did too. All of this horrible addictive behavior is bleeding over into your "get clean by tapering plan"...I just see you setting yourself up to fail if you go this route. You need to stop and admit you are an addict and stop thinking you have any control of yourself whatsoever. You don't. At all. First see the Addiction Specialist. Attempting a slooow withdraw will not work in my opinion. Even if your husband dolled out the pills, I think you'd still seek and find a way to get some. Maybe order them and have them delievered to work, unknown to him. I know all the tricks, I did them too. Since I've been on Subs I'll tell you this - once you start taking them and they start to work. Your brain begins to heal. you will see things much differently in a few short months. Not even, it sort of happens pretty fast especially if you are serious about quitting. You will not feel pain and misery, you will feel normal. And it will give you time to get rid of that "stinkin thinking" that you have going on in your head. It will give you TIME. That's a gift - TIME. You need time to heal and talk and figure some things out without the fear of withdraw holding you hostage. This is just all my personal opinion and personal experiences I've had with Tramadol. I know of one other addict around here that has experience dealing with this, I believe she had a husband addicted to them. It's a brutal drug and coming off of them doesn't have to be absolute hellish. I think you need to get your butt into see someone right away. I hope to read that you've made an appointment. Of course cost is an "issue" but is it really? Remember this - THIS IS YOUR LIFE. It's way more precious than money or any luxury you might have to "give up" in order to kick this. Please do not take offense to anything I've written, I'm actually rooting for you and think you can kick this. But I think you need to address the underlying issues most of all. Stopping is hard, I won't lie - it's weird and hard and you will have moments of doubt and temptation. But don't give in!! You are stronger than you think. You have no power where the drugs are concerned though - think of it like Superman with Kryptonite. He's wonderful and powerful beyond belief....but he comes into contact with Kryp, he can die. It sucks all his energy away. So think of Tramadol like your Kryptonite. You don't want to die right? Good luck and many (((((((hugs))))))) Love, Melissa -------------------- "If some great catastrophe is not announced every morning, we feel a certain void. nothing in the paper today , we sigh.” Paul Valery “Self-love, is not so vile a sin as self-neglecting.” William Shakespeare "Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself." George Bernard Shaw “If we couldn't laugh, we would all go insane.” Jimmy Buffet | ||
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