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Posted: September 18, 2012, 2:59 AM


Posts: 224
Joined: May 23, 2009



Hey guys/gals. How is everybody?

Think I'm goin to Pasadena Recovery Center..Scared about it. Is this a mkstake? Always feel foolish before goin to rehab. Love you guys

Just found out they can't detox me fully, so maybe I'm not going there afterall..crap! I could still go, just have to drink "effectively"...but...that sounds like controlled drinking.

This post has been edited by Dodsworth on September 18, 2012, 4:03 AM
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Posted: September 18, 2012, 5:22 AM


Posts: 5150
Joined: January 5, 2008



HI dods.. I was happy to read that you were going to reab then disappointed that maybe you aren't . what do they mean drink 'effectively"? I hope and pray you get to go. Seeking recovery is not a mistake Adam . I pray that you will get the help you need and recover so you can live a normal life............sending support and love your way..............your friend always .M

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Thank God for what you have. Trust God for what you need
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Posted: September 18, 2012, 6:06 AM


Posts: 224
Joined: May 23, 2009



Hey, Pirate. How's things?

They don't take vitals and don't do nothin really...give me an Ativan maybe...I am curious to know actual medical stuff- like liver enzyme, etc....sounds like they don't do that.
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Posted: September 18, 2012, 6:11 AM


Posts: 5150
Joined: January 5, 2008



Hey dods ativan is a no no for alkies.. what kind of reab doesn't do detox? I don't get it.


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Thank God for what you have. Trust God for what you need
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Posted: September 18, 2012, 6:20 AM


Posts: 224
Joined: May 23, 2009



Ativan is pretty common for low-budget detox...there has to be a drug component for it to be considered "detox".
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Posted: September 18, 2012, 6:25 AM


Posts: 224
Joined: May 23, 2009



They ought to give us anti-seizure meds..
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Posted: September 18, 2012, 7:20 AM


Posts: 5150
Joined: January 5, 2008



I agree. are there other reabs you can look into other than this one?


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Thank God for what you have. Trust God for what you need
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Posted: September 18, 2012, 7:54 AM


Posts: 224
Joined: May 23, 2009



Yea, been lookin at a place in Oregon, and a place in Texas. To get real medical, ya gotta go to a quasi-hospital...I could always get my liver n blood checked out separately later I suppose. Would like to know though where I stand, cant be good. Places that do that cost an extra several Gs.
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Posted: September 18, 2012, 8:26 AM


Posts: 5150
Joined: January 5, 2008



Hi. I feel for ya dods. it must be frustrating..are there any reabs that would be covered under some kind of social assistance plan for someone who can't afford it? . I sent you an email but don't know if it is under the correct email addy. if you still have mine email please.

This post has been edited by pirate on September 18, 2012, 8:27 AM

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Thank God for what you have. Trust God for what you need
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Posted: September 18, 2012, 8:41 AM


Posts: 3961
Joined: July 18, 2006



Hey, Dods.
Good decision. I hope you're scared. If you're just using it to clean up you probably won't take it seriously, so try to pay attention to the honesty component of recovery. Simply finding new friends to share black-outs with isn't recovery though it may be entertaining.

Unending supply of narcotics and mood altering drugs to a tapered zombie state unto Librium? The good news is that you'll be drug-free eventually; the bad news is that you'll still be an untreated addict/alcoholic. I get that fear--absolute chaos in the brain with no tools to shut it off? Keep sight of the spiritual aspect of recovery--if you're like me it's probably the ONLY thing that's going to save your a** now. Try being honest, first--the kind of honesty that's scary and deep. If you don't know how, just presume everything you say first is a lie--and watch others being honest.

"Seek and you shall find." God, whatever your perception of Him might be right now, doesn't make difficult the path for those who seek. Ask yourself, "What would My Higher Power have to be in order for me to allow Him/Her/It to help me?" Doesn't really matter what you call it, just get one.

Go, Adam, and take their suggestions. Don't quit moment before the miracle happens...

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Faith is not belief without proof, but trust without reservation.
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Posted: September 18, 2012, 10:48 AM


Posts: 224
Joined: May 23, 2009



Shane,

thank you for talking with me.
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Posted: September 18, 2012, 11:28 AM


Posts: 3961
Joined: July 18, 2006



I thank YOU for finding the humility to call. I know how hard that was and I applaud you for trying something different.

We are not that different, you and I. I understand how you feel. Nobody in my life could understand what went on in my head and it wasn't until I came here and went into the rooms that I found people "suffering" from the same Thinking Problems I was. I don't count it as suffering today, though. As awful as it was, I'm grateful to be free of it every single day.

Call me later.
S

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Faith is not belief without proof, but trust without reservation.
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Posted: September 18, 2012, 12:44 PM


Posts: 9142
Joined: December 1, 2005



Adam,

Go. Take what is offered and trust God to do the rest. Teachable, willingness, and enough honesty with myself is what it took to begin for me.

I'm praying for you, kiddo. The dis-ease has got it's hooks deep into you, and I know because I was there and all the negative & fear will disapate, one day at a time, when you walk through it without the drugs & alcohol, but it does take time.

I'm with SKG, don't leave before the miracle happens. It is possible for you. I promise.

xoxo
Stacey

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Happiness is not in the bottom of a pill bottle. It's inside you.
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Posted: September 18, 2012, 1:17 PM


Posts: 5150
Joined: January 5, 2008



Adam I am so glad that you got in touch with skg.. and I will repeat what has been said here.. don't leave before the miracle happens... praying for you.

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Thank God for what you have. Trust God for what you need
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Posted: September 18, 2012, 2:54 PM


Posts: 224
Joined: May 23, 2009



Pirate & 24Gordon: love you...no matter what happens. Fearing my first sober days in 9 months, but like skg told me, just gotta do it...alternative? Death or worse: drunk for another year. You all keep telling me it isn't easy, and f***, you are right! Best wishes to you all, my friends xoxo
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Posted: September 18, 2012, 4:23 PM


Posts: 9142
Joined: December 1, 2005



And I love you, Adam, no matter what happens but deep down, truthfully, I want you to live and your way is killing you.

Today you give me hope.


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Happiness is not in the bottom of a pill bottle. It's inside you.
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Posted: September 18, 2012, 5:32 PM


Posts: 5150
Joined: January 5, 2008



Love you too Adam and as Stacey said today you have given us some hope.. you have friends who love you.. you can do this.

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Thank God for what you have. Trust God for what you need
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Posted: September 19, 2012, 1:31 AM


Posts: 224
Joined: May 23, 2009



f***...even though I'm drinking, it's not enough! Still have withdrawal. Going crazy, I underestimate this s*** sometimes. Skin is crawling!!!! f*** this.

Has to be liver, stomach feels ok. Maybe it's lingering H withdrawal, but I think it's booze.

Omg, this sucks, what we go through, huh? Can't stop moving my legs. This is Hell. There is no salve for this. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry for everything.

This post has been edited by Dodsworth on September 19, 2012, 2:28 AM
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Posted: September 19, 2012, 4:35 AM


Posts: 224
Joined: May 23, 2009



Rough...crawling walls! Why so stupid. Alcohol ought to ha e easy remedies. Hate life. bulls***
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Posted: September 19, 2012, 4:48 AM


Posts: 746
Joined: August 11, 2012



hang in there man it gets better.
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