Crossdressing Addiction
Posted: January 6, 2013, 11:11 AM

my name is shaun and im a crossdressing addict. i want to get away from doing it because im in recovery and i know its just another way for me to try to change how i feel about myself on the inside by changing the way i look on the outside. i need help and support with this. i want to stop. i cant seem to let go. please any advice and support would be most appreciated.
Posted: January 7, 2013, 11:46 PM

Posts: 2347
Joined: March 29, 2005

im so sorry sweety.if this is what makes you happy,and it feels rite,than its ok.but if you feel not so good with this.than seek help.ok.someone who cares.poopie

just remember we are here to hold your hand..
Posted: April 26, 2013, 10:54 PM

Hi Shaun,

I just posted this message on another page, I hope you forgive me for just copying and pasting but it applies here, too, I think.

What are your beliefs or attitudes about the idea of God? I myself never appreciated the bible thumping "Jesus loves you but knock it off" crap and therefore ended up searching everywhere else for answers because I didn't want to be condemned for something I couldn't control. It wasn't until all other measures failed that I relented and sought after honest truth on my own directly from the source Himself that things turned around. And I'm not just talking addictions. Deep, dark things I have never told anyone else but Him about.

You mentioned how dirty and ashamed you feel because of it, and I can definitely relate to that.

There is a story in the gospels of a man who sought Jesus out, I believe he was a leper, and fell down on his knees and said, "Lord if you are willing, you can make me clean." And Jesus told him, "I am willing. Be clean." He wasn't telling him to go get clean, he was commanding His will into reality, and immediately this man's "uncleanness" left Him.

I can tell you from personal experience, I wasn't raised in some churchy environment by any means, He is willing. But it takes someone seeking Him out with every fiber of their being.

Anyway, I hope this isn't out of place and I hope no one feels like I'm swooping in like a vulture trying to rack up tally marks for a trip to heaven or something. That truly is not my intention. And most if not all 12 step/recovery groups will suggest you at least be open to a higher power's existence and willingness to assist you. This is the only thing that worked for me. I don't feel like I'm just resisting or suppressing urges all of the time, just trying to white-knuckle it to the finish line. I truly am free.

I sincerely hope you find some peace. I know it isn't fun to be tormented by these things. Best wishes.

Posted: May 28, 2013, 11:35 AM

Why do you want to change that part of you cross dressing there is nothing wrong with that you are not hurting anyone and it isn't illegal so why do you want to stop if you enjoy it? If it's because what other people think then get new friends who will except you as anyone who is nasty to you because you like to cross dress is not worth knowing if you are worried about what people may think of you don't be it's a different day and age now look at all them famous cross dressers there are why don't you go to some different gay clubs where there will be other cross dressers and have a laugh why not you only live once and there are worse things you could be doing trust me!
Posted: October 11, 2014, 7:20 AM

QUIT telling people to accept and embrace cross dressing!!!! It IS WRONG! I am addicted to it and yes, I love it, but it is IMMORAL! It also controls your life and hurts those you love whether they know about it or not! If you want to embrace it, that is your decision. But anyone wanting out should be helped…not talked out of it. You are just trying to make yourselves feel good about a part of you that should never be expressed. It is very difficult to stop but I do not buy this "its who you are" crap! It's who you have allowed yourself to become in response to things in your life that make you want attention, acceptance and many others! I fully intend to wipe this demon from my life and I applaud others who can see this deception for what it is.

Steve (formally Stephanie)
Posted: March 3, 2015, 11:10 AM

Look at:

The author survived crossdress addiction and give great advice.
Posted: March 11, 2015, 11:01 AM

Posts: 574
Joined: February 25, 2009

"You are just trying to make yourselves feel good about a part of you that should never be expressed."

Why would you want to repress something that makes you YOU?

I go to church with so many men and women who were told their "born and created and loved by God" homosexuality or transsexuality was wrong - a sin. And so many of them became addicted to drugs and alcohol because they were trying so hard to deny who they were and deaden that pain of self-doubt.

But now they're living full, open lives full of love and happiness because they finally accepted themselves and surrounded themselves with OTHERS who accept them as well.

It's OK to be who you were created to be. YOU'RE OK as you were created to be!

You might want to read Jenny Boylan's book about her struggles with this:

Also, I will now quote "The Velveteen Rabbit."

"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in your joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand. But once you are Real you can't become unreal again. It lasts for always."

Posted: May 27, 2015, 10:39 AM

I also am addicted to crossdressing, and have been for over 30 years. I am straight, have a wife and a grown son. I just cant seem to stop. In fact, the older I get, the more I embrace this other side of me. It is addiction that needs refueled nearly everyday. The trick is to control it so that I does not control you. I will get all dressed up some days, other days I will just slip on a bra for a few minutes. I brings me some inner piece. Like most others like me, I wish the rest of our society would accept this behavior, but that is not gonna happen. Just take it to a level that you are comfortable with, and no more, and you should be fine!
"Miriam's" wife
Posted: October 26, 2015, 8:46 AM

I think "Miriam" has become addicted to crossdressing and although I initially supported and helped her become publicly presentable, she is now destroying our marriage.

I don't know where to seek help for "her" or us
Posted: December 14, 2015, 2:55 PM

Hi all. Can I ask how many are still connected to the question here. I'm looking for similar help, obviously as I found this thread
Posted: June 4, 2016, 4:54 PM

Hello all, I am also into crossdressing and feel I am addicted. To me it feels like a compulsion that is difficult to control; like alcohol or drugs. At this point in my life it doesn't really feel like it's just putting on women clothing, but it feels even when I don't think it's appropriate, I want to do it. This is an addiction. Does anyone else feel the same?
  top of page  Top